A Moment of Change

Sherry Gaba LCSW, Psychotherapist, Life & Recovery Coach is featured Celebrity Rehab on VH1. Sherry is the author of  The Law of Sobriety which uses the law of attraction to recover from any addiction. Please download your Free EBooks from Sherry™s Enrich Your Life Series. Contact Sherry at sherry@sgabatherapy.com for webinars, teleseminars, coaching packages and speaking engagements. Listen to Sherry on A Moment of Change with Sherry Gaba on CBS.

We make choices all day every day and, for the most part, the choices we make are relatively minor in our lives. Do we have pizza or salad? Does the blue shirt look better than the green or do I get this project done today or rush through it tomorrow? For those working on their journey in recovery the importance of choices is much more relevant. Simple decisions can either create the opportunity to move forward or can result in a return to addictive types of behaviors. “The Law of Sobriety” focuses in on the way that choices impact recovery and how intentional decision making is a skill that is critical for change.

In order to make intentional decisions that promote recovery, get rid of the negative and bring in positive energy and opportunities there are three important steps to take. Using these steps as a model for big and small decisions and choices will ensure that you are not reverting to negative behaviors and thoughts.

Step 1: What options do I have?

Most decisions that we make are not yes or no options, there is a whole range of possibilities. It is just easier to break everything into its simplest possible form, which may be forcing you back into negative thought patterns and decision making models. Instead look outside the box to determine what options are out there.

Step 2: What are the pros and cons of the choice I am about to make?

This is the reality check part of the intentional decision. Most choices have potential positives and possible negatives. Understanding the risks and the benefits to the decision takes thought and careful consideration. Looking only at one side or the other may close doors or limit our decision making to things we have already done before.

Step 3: Will this decision move me forward in my recovery and positive lifestyle change?

If the decision has positives, but those positives aren’t moving you in the direction you want, they aren’t really positive for you. A promotion that requires you spend more time on the road, more time away from your support system or adds stress to your life may seem positive from a financial point but may not be positive overall.

Sherry Gaba LCSW, Psychotherapist, Life & Recovery Coach is featured Celebrity Rehab on VH1. Sherry is the author of  The Law of Sobriety which uses the law of attraction to recover from any addiction. Please download your Free EBooks from Sherry™s Enrich Your Life Series. Contact Sherry at sherry@sgabatherapy.com for webinars, teleseminars, coaching packages and speaking engagements. Listen to Sherry on A Moment of Change with Sherry Gaba on CBS.

If you are a person who struggles with addictive behavior you know that your own biggest enemy is looking at you every time you stand in front of a mirror. This applies to those who are shopping addicts as well as to those who are drug addicts or alcoholics

People who have addictions to any type of substance or behavior are their own biggest problem because they cannot let go of the negative stigma that the addiction has created internally. Being able to let go of those negative thoughts about yourself will free you from their restraints and allow you to thrive, grow and change into the person you want to be.
There are four questions that you need to ask yourself to find out if your own negative thoughts are creating a quagmire for you to get out of before you can start to change. They are:

• Can I list my positive traits as easily as I can list all the faults that I have?
• Am I a good person who has made some bad choices or a bad person who only has one choice in how I react?
• Do I honestly see the options I have in making decision in my life or do I seem to be a one-way track over which I have no control?
• Can I list the positive attributes I want to have and why they are important to my own personal growth and positive change?

If you had to stop and think about these answers, or couldn’t answer at all, then negativity has definitely invaded your internal sense of self. This internal perspective about your lack of positivity is projected into the world around you, bringing in negative energy, interactions and experiences.
My book “The Law of Sobriety” talks about the often-rugged mental path that needs to be taken in order to get over the mountains of negative thoughts we have developed about ourselves through an addiction. Working with an addiction therapist or counselor is critical in being able to clearly see the path to a better, healthier self.

Working with people of all walks of life and with all types of challenges I have found that getting over this hurdle of negative self-thoughts often brings about amazing results. The world

Sherry Gaba LCSW, Psychotherapist, Life & Recovery Coach is featured Celebrity Rehab on VH1. Sherry is the author of  The Law of Sobriety which uses the law of attraction to recover from any addiction. Please download your Free EBooks from Sherry™s Enrich Your Life Series. Contact Sherry at sherry@sgabatherapy.com for webinars, teleseminars, coaching packages and speaking engagements. Listen to Sherry on A Moment of Change with Sherry Gaba on CBS.

“The Law of Sobriety” was written not only to help addicts recover from alcohol and drug addictions but also to create a different, positive and supportive frame of mind to shape the recovery and your life after recovery. Changing thinking from negative to positive allows an entirely new outlook on life, one that welcomes in the positive energy around you to sustain your recovery into the future. It is not a specific goal directed recovery; rather it is a way to become spiritual and connected rather than isolated and disconnected.

While this is a wonderful perspective and a positive change for the addict, there is still often a huge issue for the family, friends, spouses and partners that have been hurt by the addiction. These people need to also be able to move forward, to give trust and understanding and also to support the addicted person’s growth and change. In situations where co-dependency is an issue the co-dependent person needs to go through his or her own recovery program in order for the relationship to continue to be positive and possible. A life coach, addiction recovery therapists or a counselor may need to get involved to help both people understand the addiction and co-dependency issues in the relationship.

Addicts need to be able to understand the addiction from the family or friend’s perspective before they can truly begin to make the steps needed to strengthen and rebuild those relationships. Putting yourself in the other person’s shoes is a great exercise that will enable you to see things in a different light. By being able to take on a universal view of the addiction behaviors, not as a negative beat yourself up process but to gain understanding, you will receive a powerful message. By having the ability to empathize with your loved ones and friends you can get goals and look for positives that will allow you to build and rebuild the relationship.

We all have behaviors that we use to deal with issues in our lives that are not constructive, rather they are ultimately destructive. However, because the behavior we choose is meeting some immediate need we continue to use them. These behaviors may be in the form of addictions such as a drug or alcohol addiction to avoid dealing with depression or a sex addiction because we are having difficulties with boundaries.

There are other types of behaviors that we all have to allow us to mask a problem or escape from facing truth. These may not reach the level of hard core addictions but they certainly rate up there as really bad habits or soft addictions. These soft addictions, if not addressed, can create bigger problems in our lives that then start to negativity impact our world. This, by very definition, then becomes a true addiction.

The three top life wasting soft addictions that are all around us include:

1. Negativity – always nagging, always complaining and always looking for why sometime won’t or can’t work is the hallmark of a negative habit. This waste of our time in life leads to ruined relationships, missed opportunities and a low sense of self esteem as we become more and more isolated and less and less involved in the world around us.

1. Escape from reality – while alcohol and drugs are an escape from reality there are at least two other major ways to avoid dealing with the world around you and reality. These two include spending time in cyberspace instead of living in the real world and avoiding people by spending time watching television. When these two activities become your social world or you put off spending time with real people to interact or watch virtual people or characters there is a real disconnect with a healthy social life.

1. Food – there are real food addictions that are very serious, but there are also people that use food as a crutch or a tool to deal with issues without becoming truly addicted. Food soft addictions are a life wasting behavior since this type of uncontrolled food use can lead to health problems that dramatically affect length and quality of life.

Talk to a life coach, addiction therapist or a counselor if you think that any behavior that you are using on a regular basis is negatively impacting your life. It is never too late to get on a positive track!

Sherry Gaba LCSW, Psychotherapist, Life & Recovery Coach is featured Celebrity Rehab on VH1. Sherry is the author of “The Law of Sobriety” which uses the law of attraction to recover from any addiction. Please download your Free EBooks from Sherry™s Enrich Your Life Series. Contact Sherry at sherry@sgabatherapy.com for webinars, teleseminars, coaching packages and speaking engagements. Listen to Sherry on A Moment of Change with Sherry Gaba on CBS

The Law of Attraction is one of those universal principles that works for whatever you want to bring into your life. If you are able to see yourself as that individual with what you want already in your life it will happen. It may not happen today, it may not happen this year, but little by little you will find that the opportunities to reach your goal are all around you. The Law of Attraction doesn’t say you don’t have to make sound decisions and work towards your goal, what it does say is that only by positively stating what you want and living with that as your reality will the universe provide the tools you need to get there.

Well, you may be thinking, what about wealth? Can I really think myself rich, living in a mansion, touring the world and spending my days doing only what I please? The answer to the basic question is yes, you can envision yourself as wealthy and live life to achieve that goal and reach your dreams through the Law of Attraction. However, there is a bit of a catch. And that catch is at the heart of the meaning of wealth. Wealth in itself is more than just a dollar amount or the value of your investments and stock portfolio. Wealth is also not always linked to success and accomplishment. There are many wealthy people that aren’t personally successful and have never accomplished anything in their lives other than being born into luxury. Wealth reaches into all parts of your life, your relationships, your sense of self and your appreciation for the world around you.

Wealth is a state of mind, a state of being, and it is individual to each person. Having money without happiness is not going to bring about a positive, fulfilling and blessed life. In a similar analogy having happiness and no money to do what you want to do is not desirable either. Therefore, it is really important to consider wealth as a multidimensional attribute in your life. Live life as you want to be wealthy in all aspects, including financial, and you will be amazed at the changes you will see.

Sherry Gaba LCSW, Psychotherapist, Life & Recovery Coach is featured Celebrity Rehab on VH1. Sherry is the author of “The Law of Sobriety” which uses the law of attraction to recover from any addiction. Please download your Free EBooks from Sherry™s Enrich Your Life Series. Contact Sherry at sherry@sgabatherapy.com for webinars, teleseminars, coaching packages and speaking engagements. Listen to Sherry on A Moment of Change with Sherry Gaba on CBS

Sherry Gaba LCSW, Psychotherapist, Life & Recovery Coach is featured Celebrity Rehab on VH1. Sherry is the author of “The Law of Sobriety” which uses the law of attraction to recover from any addiction. Please download your Free EBooks   from Sherry’s Enrich Your Life Series. Contact Sherry at sherry@sgabatherapy.com for webinars, teleseminars, coaching packages and speaking engagements. Listen to Sherry on “A Moment of Change with Sherry Gaba”on CBS Radio.

People in recovery, as I talk about in my book “The Law of Sobriety”, are often caught up in how everyone sees them. They are typically very pessimistic about their future, their ability to lead a clean and sober life and the ability to make positive decisions as to their future. The longer that these negative thoughts last and the more entrenched that you are in how you really see yourself the more challenging your recovery will be. This is because when all we see and experience is negative, that is all that we are able to process.

The Boomerang Effect

Think of life experiences like a boomerang being thrown away from you. No matter how hard and how far you try to throw the piece of wood is eventually going to turn around and come right back to you. That is very similar to how the universe works based on the principles in the Law of Attraction. The more negativity you throw into the universe about yourself and your life, the more that of that negativity that will come back all around you. However, you can reverse this, and you have the power to do so simply by changing how you see yourself and your life.

When you send a positive boomerang out into the world around you, you won’t have to duck, it will be a positive boomerang coming back. You will see opportunities that are present to allow you to move forward.

Sending Out Positives

One very important way to get rid of the negative images you have about yourself is to get to know yourself all over again. This means spending time alone, really exploring what is important to you and what you are all about. Then the next step is to see yourself as that person being positive, being progressive, being successful. Until you are able to send that positive image of you out to the world around you it isn’t going to come back to you either.

As you become more comfortable in sending that positive energy and positive self into the world around you opportunities will begin to appear that will help you manifest that positive self. It may not happen tomorrow or the next day, but it will happen as you become more confident and secure in your pathway through recovery.

Sherry Gaba LCSW, Psychotherapist, Life & Recovery Coach is featured Celebrity Rehab on VH1. Sherry is the author of “The Law of Sobriety” which uses the law of attraction to recover from any addiction. Please download your Free EBooks   from Sherry’s Enrich Your Life Series. Contact Sherry at sherry@sgabatherapy.com for webinars, teleseminars, coaching packages and speaking engagements. Listen to Sherry on “A Moment of Change with Sherry Gaba”on CBS Radio.

People spend thousands of dollars and untold hours per year trying to find that perfect match, their soul mate, or their better half. In fact, if you believe in a higher power in the universe that perfect person is out there, will come to you and will become the absolute match to your life. Unfortunately the things that you are doing may actually be harming your changes to make this amazing connection.

The Law of Attraction states that if you seek what you are looking for in the world around you the universe will provide. However, what the Law of Attraction doesn’t state is that you get to dictate the time line and all the details of that other person’s life. In our quest to find a mate we are often looking for more than just a person that complete us, we are looking for someone who is stunningly attractive, incredible wealthy or a combination of other factors. If we do that we are constantly seeing what other people don’t have, rather than what they are offering.

Negative thoughts about the people we meet send a powerful message outwards that creates negative influences on the world around us. When we are constantly looking for what people don’t have, we fail to see what they do have to offer. When we are constantly thinking about how we will never find that perfect match we are not open to the positive people that are right in front of our eyes.  Changing thinking from a deficit perspective in people that we meet to a positive and attribute based perspective can be an amazing opportunity to meet Mr. or Mrs. Right.

Of course it is important to realize that all things do take time. We cannot simply think one day that we will look for the good in people and expect to meet our heart’s desire. We do have to be consistent in ridding those negative, picky thoughts from our minds and staying focused on the attributes that we are looking for.

“The Law of Sobriety”, my latest book, puts the importance of positive thinking front and center in recovery from alcohol and drug addiction. If you can’t see yourself as a sober person you will always see yourself as a person with an addiction. This is never a positive self-image. It is negative, harmful and highly counterproductive in your recovery efforts.

Seeing yourself as sober starts with envisioning your life without an addiction. Ask yourself:

• What do I look like as a sober person?
• What do I do as a sober person?
• What are my goals as a sober person?
• Who are my friends and supporters as a sober person?

By developing a self-concept of yourself as a sober, positive and successful person surrounding by supporting, caring individuals you literally create a mental reality that is positive and meaningful. This is far different than that negative image of the addicted you that you have harbored in your mind for years. Opening up your mind to the positive you allows options in your life that you simply couldn’t see before. You negativity and looking back was blocking the positive energy from the world around you literally trapping you in that dark, gloomy place.

I firmly believe that everything you need to be a sober, successful person is already in your world. All you need to be able to do is change your negative thinking and positive energy blocking to open up your heart and mind to what the universe is providing. This transformation is possible for anyone; but it isn’t easy work. Talk to an addiction counselor or therapist that uses the Law of Attraction and positive energy to make changes and you will be amazed at how wonderful the world will be to you.

Join me March 6 with my co-host Cathleen O’Connor on CBS Radio’s A Moment Of Change – We open with author# Melissa Binstock who talks with us about her journey, struggles, and ultimate success in the face of mental health conditions documented in her book Nourishment: Feeding My Starving Soul When My Mind and Body Betrayed Me. Then we welcome #Sonia Ricotti, author of best-sellers Unsinkable: How to Bounce Back Quickly When Life Knocks You Down and The Law of Attraction Plain and Simple who shares with us her three step formula to overcome any life adversity and come out on top.http://sky.radio.com/shows/a-moment-of-change-w-sherry-gaba/

A Moment Of Change w/ Sherry Gaba & Cathleen O’Connor

sky.radio.com

A Moment Of Change w/ Sherry Gaba & Cathleen O’Connor

Sherry Gaba LCSW, Psychotherapist, Life & Recovery Coach is featured Celebrity Rehab on VH1. Sherry is the author of “The Law of Sobriety” which uses the law of attraction to recover from any addiction. Please download yourFree EBooks   from Sherry’s Enrich Your Life Series. Contact Sherry at sherry@sgabatherapy.com for webinars, teleseminars, coaching packages and speaking engagements. Listen to Sherry on “A Moment of Change with Sherry Gaba”on CBS Radio.

Sherry Gaba LCSW, Psychotherapist, Life & Recovery Coach is featured Celebrity Rehab on VH1. Sherry is the author of “The Law of Sobriety” which uses the law of attraction to recover from any addiction. Please download yourFree EBooks   from Sherry’s Enrich Your Life Series. Contact Sherry at sherry@sgabatherapy.com for webinars, teleseminars, coaching packages and speaking engagements. Listen to Sherry on “A Moment of Change with Sherry Gaba”on CBS Radio.

I am a strong believer in the role of meditation in making changing in your life. In “The Law of Sobriety” I discuss the importance of mediation for those that are in recovery from any type of addiction. Mediation is one way to focus, shift our thoughts from negative to positive, and learn about ourselves again. It is also a great way to experience life and learn to look at the details, beauty and world around us in a positive energy and light.

Mediation doesn’t require any special tools, techniques or training. Anyone can meditate on a daily basis, all you need is a quiet, distraction free environment and 10 to 20 minutes all on your own. Some people find that meditating looking at a candle, a flower or a blank wall is helpful while others find that closing their eyes allows them to focus. The key to meditation is to find the focus that allows you to clear your mind of all the negative chatter. In my book I refer to this as “monkey mind”, a common term for those that practice meditation. It is the jumping, chattering, random type of thoughts that run through your mind all the time and lead to impulsive behavior.

To clear your mind of those negative, chattery monkey mind thoughts start by practicing the following:

• Sit quietly and breathe deeply. Control your breathing and focus on taking a breath in through your nose, deep into your lungs, then exhaling through the mouth. Seeing and feeling the air move through your body will help in focusing your thoughts.
• See each thought as a balloon that enters your mind then drifts up and away. Once out of sight the thought is gone, leaving a clear blue sky.
• Think of a particular image that is pleasant to you. This is good option to use a flower, candle, blank wall, leaf or any other type of object to create a focal point that limits negative thoughts or chatter.

There are great meditation videos online plus you can also talk to a therapist or life coach to help you get started. A daily meditation will help you in thinking through issues, limiting impulsive behavior and finding true meaning and purpose in your life.