A Pagan's Blog

A Pagan's Blog

Empathy, Understanding, and Agreement

posted by Gus diZerega | 1:01pm Thursday June 18, 2009

Franklin Evans in commenting on the last post suggested I host a
discussion of what these words mean because he says they are often
confused by people.

Perhaps they are.  Let’s see,


My own perspective, put somehwat briefly is this:

EMPATHY is the
ability to put oneself in another’s shoes, either other people or
myself at a future date because that future ‘me’ is different from ‘me’
right now.  This means one cannot act in one’s long term self-interest
without the ability to epathize – to foresee future effects of our
actions and to care abut them.  We care when we empathize. 

In my view empathy is the foundation for moral action – as was seen by Hume and
Adam Smith – and its lack is the defining characteristic of sociopaths.  Our
ability to empathize with others  different from ourselves, as well as how deeply we empathize, comprise sliding
scales towards of our ability to enter into “Thou” relationships. 

It has a lot to do with some kinds of understanding and nothing much to do with agreement.

UNDERSTANDING
- ‘Understanding’ is very complex. In our society this usually this
refers to a logical process by which we can see what a claim means and
the reasons behind it or it can take a more ‘gestalt’ form of seeing
the meaning of a situation.  Understanding the message of a deity takes
this form in my experience. 

Understanding can bleed over into
relying on empathy as well, for to understand another’s motives we
often need empathy. Thus, understanding is very contextual as to how it
is applied.

I can understand an argument and not agree with it. 

AGREEMENT – seems to me obvious, and there are degrees of it.  I hope you agree.



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Franklin Evans

posted June 19, 2009 at 12:59 pm


The difficulty I see (first amongst several) is the internal filter many people have. I do not mean to imply “problem” here, because internal filters are what keep us sane.
Empathy is an adjunct to imagination. Its accuracy is based on practice, feedback and reinforcement. Unfortunately, it is not the sort of thing one can develop and bank on. It requires constant maintenance.
Understanding — by which I refer to its value in human interaction — is largely intellectual. One cannot jump from feeling bad for a person to understanding why that person feels bad. The rational thought processes have to work in between.
Agreement is too often attached (like a leach) to empathy and understanding in the minds of people with agendas. Allowing a person’s feelings to project into our awareness (empathy) or projecting ourselves enough to see the facts and follow the thought processes of others (understanding) is seen as a risk that we will automatically agree with the other person despite how we natively feel about the issue or topic.
In short, fear is the primary motivation for assuming agreement.



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xiananarchist

posted June 21, 2009 at 6:56 am


I believe that empathy and understanding are elements/agents of identification. Empathy is an emotional resonance, and as such is the primary way that “feelers” connect with others. Understanding is an intellectual resonance, and as such is the primary way that “thinkers” connect with others. Ideally, we work toward the strengthening of both in ourselves.
I must have missed the conversation this is based on, and I don’t know why agreement is in here. I don’t see it related. It is possible to say “I understand what you’re saying and I feel your pain, but I don’t come to the same conclusion that you do.”



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Franklin Evans

posted June 21, 2009 at 10:23 am


In the Spirituality and Empathy thread, I posted to Gus the following:
“In my travels, I’ve encountered basic misunderstandings of these terms: empathy, understanding, agreement.
In general, people seem to mean all three at the same time regardless of which one is being used and often regardless of the context.”
Gus generously took up my suggestion and created this thread.



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xiananarchist

posted June 21, 2009 at 10:25 pm


Ah. Thank you for clarifying, Franklin.



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