Interesting. Thanks for the post!

The e-book version of The Story of a Soul by St. Therese is available for free on Project Gutenberg http://www.gutenberg.org/etext/16772

I had this same bewildering disease, only my realization came at the foot of the cross. This is not a sermon but my own personal testimony, I became good at having an escape clause for everything except myself so when my life took a downward spiral I believed it was the worst thing that could ever happen. Nada!, it was the best thing to happen to and for me, it was in this dark dungeon of”I’ll never get out” I found LOVE as I had never known existed, it was God’s merciful LOve and goodness that not only saved me but ultimately turned my life around! I still have days of “ho hum drum” the difference is now They don’t overshadow who I am or what my purpose is, I only have to call or think upon my Lord and Savior and I am renewde to that place of tranquility, peace and thanksgiving. I have learned even in the process of going thru I am okay! As I said this is my testimony! God bless you to reach for Him in the darkness of your despair

Life can surely throw curve balls that immediately causes questions related to frustration and depression. I’m there. My mom is sick and I’m treated as though I’m an only child when there are 3 of us. My marriage is a total mess and I’m trying to stay afloat with my bills. I know God is there but my prayers feel unanswered. I know there’s a blueprint that he designed before he put life into me but the struggle is difficult and this path is hard.

I love this blog!! Struggled for years with depression until I; like Diva1; found a heart relationship with God. It has made all of the difference in the world. One of the reasons that I was so depressed was the lack of congruity in what I knew was right and my actions. Have found taking the right action will lead to the right feelings. Now surround myself with friends who are open, vulnerable and oozing with unconditional love. If there was ever a time that this old world needed people who can pass on their faith with encouragement and a smile it is today.

I hope this goes thru as I need to express my feelings and need advise. I had been living with an addict for 16 yrs and I finally made him move out-even tho he is an addict he treats me like gold. He is always there for me, takes care of me when I am sick conforts me when I am upset eveything u would want in a man but he has this addiction. We have been back together for about 1 yr now and he is back at it. I just can’t take it but I don’t want to be alone either-I have a 2nd appointment with a clinical phys. next week hope that she can help me-I do not do drugs and I am a chrsitian. Any one can help me with what I am going thru I hate that I am going to have to go thru the pain all over again. Needing help in Memphis.

Lisa, Al-Anon is a great resource and probably there is an Narc-Anon also. They are a very supportive group for family members and friends of those suffering from addiction. Don’t give up on him; from personal experience in my own addictions know that change can come all it takes is Honesty, Openness and Willingness. This are also a time to put that personal faith of yours to practical work. That’s what moves it from head knowledge to the heart.

Great post!

Interesting story. Please interview Senia from Senia.com she has some amazing information on happiness that is easily integrated and works on a deep level. Her website has lots of information and ideas for free as well. She studied Positive Psychology and it shows in her work. Thanks

I always read Beyond Blue but have never commented until today. It is easy to relate to everything you are writing about and I always go away with some bit of inspiration that I can use in life to help me with my anxiety and depression. Thank you for sharing your insight.

Therese! You’ve done it again, by introducing us to Gretchen. She is truly beautiful, inside and out. I particularly enjoyed her Twelve Commandments, but they leave out “love yourself,” the most important. And, Lisa, I lived for 3 years with an addict, and knew then that I was addicted to HIM! He, too, treated me like gold, and he had such a way about him, that I miss him to this day. He died at 35 of poison gas in his apartment, while trying to block the outlet. I lost my first husband about that time, too, at 35 of a massive heart attack – two tragedies that formed a major depression. What I and Richard are trying to tell you – your partner CAN be saved through your love and care. It is difficult living with someone with addiction – Narcanon can help. If he is good to you, then he CAN be saved. God Bless you all, and keep on “blogging!”

Dear Theresa, I too have suffered from depression. I have Migraine headaches,fibromyalgia,arthritis, and several other problems. I lost my husband suddenly in 2005. It has been a real struggle to be left alone.I know the Lord knows what is best, but there days I want to die. I have two children ages 21 and 24. My life will never be the same. I am depressed but I am taking medication for this. I do appreciate your article and pray you continue on with this.

Please help me, I love this man who I have lived w/ for almost 2yrs now. He wants to get married but, has a problem talking about things that need to be discussed, like his children & their needs. I have doubts of getting married because he can’t seem to see that I have some needs also. I feel its so unfair to marry if we argue more than we get along. We are struggling w/ finances, and fixing to lose our home. He & his children have had some rough times, & I want to change that, but, I need him to be there for me. I stand beside him with all his dreams, and how can I get him to stand beside me? Someone please help! Tell me what to do, he is a good man other than his anger, which his son has a problem w/ anger also. We all deserve happiness. I am tired of taking antidepressants to help me, when its not just me. He needs to learn life can’t go on like this.

Thanks for being real! For a good part of my life, my M.O., or method of operation, has been to be so terrified of being “discovered imperfect,” that I hid out a lot. Lived in Nat’l Parks in remote cabins for five years at a time, while of course, working in high drama jobs. My career choices supported my need for privacy: DV/SA Counseling, criminal justice, Social Services Investigator, etc.. I created an alter person and have lived as I wanted to be known. I AM this person but I wish I had discovered an antidepressant medication in my teens. I look back and recognize many of my life decisions were made from emotion rather than reason. All the time RUNNING from my need to be perfect or to heal fear of abandonment issues. WHATEVER!! At some place deep within ourselves, either in response from desire to be a good parent ( single mom of two successful women), or because to carry the burden of craziness and self doubt; we get just plain tired. I finally made a commitment with myself to 1) never place myself in a position where I need to disown who I TRUELY AM, 2) to honor my deep needs such as to: choose peaceful surroundings, friends, places, and my menmtal attitudes, and to 3) treat myself as special as I do clients, others on this planet. To anyone out there who feels hollow or drowning in inner pain: speak to a caring woman doctor or rare male doctor who believes in you and try medication. Stop blaming your own self. Live simply without high drama. Continue to seek out inspiration which mirrors your philosophy. I appreciate Melody Beatty, Nathaniel Branden, Carl Rodgers, Elizabeth Kubler Ross……………….Just be the love which we all have been given before we may have been distorted by events in life……..start today!!! Love, Cindy

Hi Lisa* Honey, being cared for and loved, is our deep, deep, desire. After codependent relationships and violent relationships for half of my own life; I was so beaten down emotionally, that I had no choice but to move on. I can remember the struggle to tear myself into shreds to leave the good , which had becomne distorted due to my own dependencies and strive for the sane l, I knew I deserved. Relationships which drain usemotionally,no matter, if the sex is great, tender ( manipulative) and moments happen every once in awhile…YOU NEED TO HEAL from this one. I became a DV Counselor and learned that shame happens to many of us. That we CAN still LOVE and TAKE CARE OF US. I am reaching out to you with a big hug. Life does NOT have to be hard. We do NOT have to earn love. Being spiritual is comforting. Continue studying Lisa with trusted friends. WE ONLY HAVE LIMITED LIFE FORCE…….your lovers journey is HIS NOT Lisa’s. Cindy

Therese and Gretchen, Thanks to both of you for your new project and being willing to talk about a subject that still seems to be somewhat taboo. I have dealt with depression for over 6 years now and have been recovering for the last 3. After a lot of soul-searching and experimenting with different methods of self-help, I finally feel that I am in a much better place. The trick for me was that I was unable to take anti-depressants due to some horrifying side effects, and I didn’t have the great advantage of medical insurance to cover any treatments. I had to do everything on my own, and I had to become very creative in my ‘self-treatment’. This has taught me a lot about what really makes happiness. I have learned so much in fact, that I have become a life coach helping people with the same challenges that they face from this debilitating disease ( ONLY after phsychotherapy and/or regulated medications, of course.) People who suffer from depression have goals and dreams like anyone else. Some have the one main goal which is to just be happier, and that is a process that is learned. We just shouldn’t confuse happiness with joy. Happiness can be a fleeting thing, where as joy is the everlasting feeling that comes from deep inside your self. Good Luck to you both, and God bless. Dorraine

I am truly grateful for this website, it has really helped me. I suffer from recurrent depression, and it is probably genetic since my family history is FULL of mental illness and alcoholism. I also have fibromyalgia, so sometimes it is hard to tell which is worse, the physical pain or the mental pain. I told my doctor that I can deal with one at a time but both together are a bit much! I take comfort in the words of Mother Theresa, who said “I know that God will not give me more than I can handle, I just wish he didn’t trust me so much.”

Hi, Im 18 yrs old. I been sent to a diff facility since i was 11 yrs old cuz my dad died and I tried to kill myself. So then was Hillcrest, 3xs, since but four DYS facilties. Got 45 felonies since 2003 cuz of stuff from my own house. And my Gma is a “not so nice crazy lady”. So Neway, I been had 2 yrs free since 11 and Im 18 so thats all I know is bein locked up in psych wards and rehab and boot camp, group homes, and Chalkville, (a juvenile prison B4 & I am just back since Feb of this yr so I liked your comment. Write back if ya like that to reply to. M Cooper

The best thing you can do for yourself when suffering from anxiety and despression is to stay on your meds for one thing. The second thing is to remember your are a soul in a body, not a body with a soul. Do try some form of meditiation. I tried Chakra. Believe me it works! I have now begun to heal from my “inner wounds” that have haunted me all my life. It will help you release all the negative energies within your body and it also gives you positive affirmations. I am now the person I should be, NOT the person I have been showing to the world all these years.
Another good thing to do is when a negative thought comes to mind, tap your forhead and say eject! Your subconscious will eventually get the picture! (This came from Sylvia Brown).
Good luck to all. I know how you feel. I’ve been there.

I am going to be quite honest here and say that I subscribed to this website and I forget why and since I have so much mail, I normally delete things. Well, today I opened it and boy, I wish I would have done that months ago.
This is my life. This is the torchure I have been facing for so long now and with no one to really get me. I opened this today looking for ways to be happy and wow, what an eye opener.
I am a 38 year old mom of an eight year old and a fourteen year old. Both are girls. I am married going on ten years and my life plain out just sucks.
I suffer from anxiety and depression along with a host of other problems like fibromyalgia, Epstein Barr, high cholesterol, PCOS and the list goes on a mile long. I have been asking myself WHAT IS NEXT? IS LIFE REALLY SUPPOSED TO BE LIKE THIS? WHAT AM I DOING HERE?
I have been very depressed lately and trying, myself, to wean off my antidepressant because my mother thinks it is making me more depressed. Did I mention that I am 38 and still worried what my mom thinks? LOL.
I am unemployed due to severe pain in my neck and back but I am ready to go back to work because I will go crazy if I don’t. I am in college as well making a 4.0 G.P.A. and still feel like a failure. I made the National Dean’s List Book which means I was one of the very few (1%) out of the entire countries college students that made this book and still, I am not happy. It can’t be real I think. I am depressed, anxiety ridden, unhappy, fat, miserable, unworthy and a loser so HOW CAN I MAKE THIS BOOK?
All I want in this life is live the rest of it a happy, satisfied person. I feel there is nothing more to be happy with and that scares me. I do not want to be rich or beautiful or anything, I just want to be happy and healthy. I want to WANT to wake up in the morning.
Am I off track here? I just commented on how I feel in hopes that someone else feels as crappy and lost as I do and can give me wisdom.
Thank you all for listening. I have more thoughts but too much to write about.
Nicole

Nicole,
Your comments moved me. I’m not writing because I have any special answers but because my empathy (not sympathy) goes out to you. You are better than you think. You have dealt with many debilitating issues in your life and you still manage to look for hope. I applaud you for that. My answer to happiness was answered years ago when I asked God to tell me and show me the truth. He brought to his feet and the feet of Christ. I am not a religious freak but a person on a spiritual journey who found solace in the Lord. This has helped my life tremendously. I learned of him and discovered that God wants the best for me and wants me to understand him and the scriptures.
I hope you find your “true happiness,” and yest it does come from within but we have to believe it and grab hold of it by changing our thought patterns.
Everything in life has a cost–but once you give yourself over freely to the one who created you–it will be well worth the price.
God’s peace and blessings be with you. “Seek and ye shall, find.” “Knock and the doors shall be opened.” For everyone that seeketh findeth.” May be misquoted but you get the point. Seek GOD!!
Write back if you choose.

Best thing I ever read!!!!!!!!!!!!

I
suffer from many birth defects in my neck and spine.Also fibromyalgia.
I am so sick of this pain. Doctors’s will only give me anti-inflamatory medication that makes me bleed.

Yes, this is a very helpful website. It helps to read that you are not the only one with problem. I got depression. I am overweight.. but i have been for like 15 years already i wasn’t depressed before. I am still not married and no bf right now. I was engaged in 2004, but in a few months, guy backed out without me understanding what is really his issues. Am i dumb or what? Until now this cause me pain. The guy has been my best friend for years. I felt so betrayed. I don’t see him anymore nowadays.And i guess it add to my frustrations. I also become distrustful of men who would like to be close to me. I guessed what makes me depressed is that i am just like sitting on see-saw.. am up and down am down again. It is hard. I cant seem to get out of financial problems because i have soft heart and would always prioritize other people’s needs before mine. I got a boss who pushed me against the wall to resign or I would lose a great opportunity of taking a higher degree and this does not help my financial situation. But I think what I really want to share is that, holding on to God and praying always, make things a bit easier. For some time i feel so bad that despite being a good person i get so many problems and many people not treating me good, but I realize that God is giving me many blessings too, I just dont acknowledge it. I have my family, good opportunities passing by and good friends. But then I hope i will be stronger and fight depressions off easily. Thanks to this website. I felt a notch better.

That all sounds very good, but let’s talk about #12. First you have to learn to accept yourself as you are. Then you have to learn to like yourself and believe you are a worth-while human being. Until you can do this #12 is not possible. When I was “down’” all I could do was sit and cry. I belong to a group, DBSA, which says if you can not hold your own candle someone will hold it for you. Now that I am better, I am busy helping others.

It is hard cause sometimes taking care of yourself means risking making choices. Right now I have to make a choice, yet when I do this, someone else will be hurt. I don’t want to hurt them, Yet I have to take care of myself.I have work hard to be where I am now. Yes, I slip back sometimes, but now I do my best not to fall in the Black hole as I call it. It has taken me a long time just to like myself & now I am staring to see Myself as a person of worth.
I have been looking at this web site & reading things that help & remind myself that I am not alone, unless I choose to be.Thanks for being here

I can truly relate to not being happy. I have found that no one can make you happy. This is something that comes from within. I have been with the same man (whose my husband) for 30 years and can’t seem to find happiness within our relationship. I have voiced this to him and he can’t understand why I’m not happy. Many times I’ve told him that I’m not happy with where I’m at in my life. He will tell me that I’m doing alright and that my friends aren’t doing any better. What I’ve come to realize is that I’ve always had great expectations and he didn’t. I’m always looking for opportunities to better myself and he doesn’t. We are not only on separate pages, but in two different books. I don’t blame anyone for my unhappy moments, but I do know that I have to take control of my life. If you are not happy with yourself, no one else can feel that void for you. So I thank you for writing about the Happiness Project and from this day forward I will be working hard on my own project!!

I so enjoy getting into my mail and reading daily topics on the beliefnet.com site. I find most all the information very helpful and guiding in my life now! Feels as though I have just been drifting through mid air most of my life, but now am finding, even though I am not financially self sufficient, that my worth as a human being in doing any good deed that I can, is a worthwhile cause-even just as one individual being, each is a contribution to some good along the way. I feel that I am stuggling with a depressive nature currently and the readings are of help! I feel we all need to self reflect more often than going off on anothers flaws, but find myself slipping here more often than I prefer to admit, and then this troubles me over and over again. I will continue reading and asking God for his guidance and at this time wish to Thank You for your words that are also of help. So much turmoil is happening in this world and I wish I had the ability to not at to it! Again Thank you so much, and may God Bless us all!
Linda DenHerder

I hate that so many people feel like I do, but it is a relief to see that I am not alone. I too am unhappy with many aspects of my life. I go through the motions, even just recently graduated RN program and passed boards. I worry too much about others. I have a grown child who lives with hubby and me. His girlfriend and her daughter also live here. I need to have them grow up and find a place of their own, but I continue to support their immature attitudes by letting them live here. I pray occasionally, but am ashamed to say not daily. I know I am truly blessed, and need to thank God more often. Does anyone have any suggestions on how to effectively set bounderies. This would relieve alot of stress in my life, as I have a very hard time saying no. I know I have to be responsible for my own happiness, I am better some days than others in my work toward that goal.

This is my first time reading Beyond Blue. I didn’t realize that my experience with depression and anxiety is shared by so many others. Now I don’t feel so lonely. I wish I knew people who I could talk to on a regular basis who experience depression/anxiety. I always feel as if I’m all alone in this and that just makes it all so much worse. Can someone please advise me as to how to build friendships with people like ourselves? For example, where can I go, who should I contact, how do I take the step to reach out? I am very motivated but lacking in ideas. Spirituality is mainly an untapped source for me at this time. I simply don’t know how to explore it, but I do know I’d like to talk to others about it and not experience it alone. Thanks and my heart goes out to all of you.

The only way to be happier is to live life to the fullest and enjoy it. This I know to be true because I am a breast cancer survivor. And find that I’ve been given a second chance to really enjoy and value everyday, my family, my friends and everything that surrounds me. Just being silly and and laughing makes everyday a wonder. So, everyone be happy and enjoy every precious moment that God gives you.

Yes, i can relate to all the letters on being happy. I have been a widow for 15 years now, and now that i am alone, i have asked myself what would make me happy. My husband made most of our decisions for 30 years, and now it is up to me. I find that very challenging, and
I am trying each day to find that happiness and love i so desire. I do love animals and they make me happy. I am now writing a book of poetry. so who knows what i may find?

I live by those rules, hard at times, but it opens my mind reading
about others living life to it`s fullest. Stay on track, it lefts
your spirtes ! And others who fell it around them.

Some times we must stand our groud, let our loved once know enogth
hard times for our self! it takes time to make a change, but it sound s like you need to start slowly with your self and your loved once.
but you need to start or it will never change ! things do really work !
When it seems hard, it just gets easyer ! have a great life, it`s great
God Bless to all of you.

I am a happy individual because I choose to be. Sounds too simple, right? Well, honestly it is simple. The day will come when you realize that you must be the priority in your life. If you are happy and peaceful, everyone you touch will be, too. If you are down…everything you encounter will reflect this sadness and lack back to you. Choose to be happy! Look at the positives in your world, don’t dwell on the negatives. When you change how you look at things…the things you look at change. Claim the beauty of self from within. You are glorious! Live your life to the fullest…go on take out the fine crystal and pour kool-aid in it!

The big apple.
On the path of life that we all share, we find one
apple that everyone longs for. Would it be just to share its nutrition ?
The Big Apple is where we all find ourselves. Who has the nutrition ?
Is the trail just ?
Will the trail adjust itself? Is life’s purpose to adjust it ?
Are you and I using the tools to fix our corresponding paths ?
If not, adjust yourself, and you’ll plant peace.
Happiness will be the fruit of your labor.
Are you a beast that feeds of the harvest of others ?
Humanity…. Where are you ?
Janai Vargas 1:50 PM 9/11/2007

Hi, I’ve been in a relationship for 22 years. I can say that I have been unhappy for about 20 yrs. Because of love, I remained in the relationship. Now, it’s so hard for me to get out of the relationship. I’m unhappy, my kids fulfill my life, they are my everything but the relationship has been dead for a very long time. The love is not there like it was 22 yrs ago. Love died for me. I know what I have to do, the question is how do I do it??

Smile! Yes smile thirty minutes a day and your life will change. Go to the mirror, smile and say I love you. Do that for thirty minutes and will chase the blues away.

I am a 26 year old, single mom of a 6 and an 8 year old (dad is not involved at all, nor does he pay C.S.) I work full-time and go to school part-time, and try to fit time in for my kids. I have no time to eat well, workout, or time for me and my friends-so I think it is hard to find happiness amoung all the muck. About 2 years ago, I discovered my love for cars, and that is where I found some happiness. Now, I’m going for a degree in automotive technology and will someday be a mechanic. I have found that I am so happy working on cars and feeling accomplished when I get the job done. So that ‘s what I think it’s all about, finding something that makes you feel satisfied, no matter how much stressful stuff you have going on.

Greetings:
Hi I am 30 years old. I am learning to be happy everyday because life is too short and we waste too much time complaining instead of being grateful that we have arms, legs, sight, the ability to taste the wonderful foods God has blessed us with. Most of my life, I was not happy or loved myself and this is why I cause tremendous damage to myself I have been a size 0 and a size 26 but now I have lossed some of the weight and I can wear a size 18. I am still trying to work the weight off but more importantly, I am learning to love myself and in doing this, I am learning to love my daughter and learning to love my husband. I have been in love with my husband for eight years now but I am learning to love him because when I didn’t love myself and I was in the mental ward three times, he nursed me back to health, he took care of our daughter, he made sure that I was taken care of, he was my protector during the storm and I thank God for him, through it all.
Allah is great and I hope through all of our journeys we get a chance to experience his infinite love.
Love,
Ninya

I’m a 48 year old black women, that have live all my life with gulit and shame. WHICH TURN INTO DEPRESSION.I have two children that feel that i never showed them love, i have been married twice, marry the first one to resuce me from all my inner pain, the second husband was kind, loving, and gentle until i went into rage, of fear of living. I constant live in fear , with or without medication,and therapy. I am afarid that i will die and never experience true love, and peace. I was thinking about relocating to another city to start over, but how does one statr over, when you have no real feelings of joy and peace please pray for me my children, i have tried for years to ask God to help me but the fear of freedom comes back there is so much to my story please pray for me and my family. Thank You