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I loved this story by Beyond Blue reader Melzoom on the combox of my post, “Dear God: Come All Who are Weary”:
My second suicide attempt was not immediately severe enough to put me in the hospital. My husband came home to find me bleeding all over the bathroom, but with my first aid training and virtually all the butterfly bandages in the house, we “fixed me up.” He told me we had to go to the hospital. I refused. Both of us felt very scared. Each of us completely alone as we cleaned the bathroom and then held each other.
The next morning, he said we needed to go for a drive. And what a drive it was. He drove me from Ohio to Virginia Beach, checked us into a hotel on the waterfront, and walked me out to the beach. We sat there for a moment. It was cold and the air was damp, no spring-breakers, the beach was completely empty. Watching the waves, I felt everything well up inside me and started sobbing. I sat in the sand, arms wrapped around my knees, mascara staining my jeans, and my husband sitting beside me, legs outstretched and arm over my shoulders. I gave it all: the pain, my pride, my silly insistence that I could do it ‘on my own’ to the breakers crashing onto that empty beach.
After about an hour, as I started to compose myself and breathe he said, “I hoped the ocean would help you see.” We went to dinner that night, drove home the next day, and the following morning I checked into the hospital.
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Therese J. Borchard writes the daily blog, Beyond Blue, on Beliefnet and is a regular contributor to the award-winning blog, World of Psychology, on Psych Central. Therese is the author of Beyond Blue: Surviving Depression & Anxiety and Making the Most of Bad Genes and The Pocket Therapist: An Emotional Survival Kit. Subscribe to Beyond Blue, visit her website, or follow her on Twitter @thereseborchard.
Meet others on the journey in
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Therese J. Borchard writes the daily blog, Beyond Blue, on Beliefnet and is a regular contributor to the award-winning blog, World of Psychology, on Psych Central. Therese is the author of Beyond Blue: Surviving Depression & Anxiety and Making the Most of Bad Genes and The Pocket Therapist: An Emotional Survival Kit. Subscribe to Beyond Blue, visit her website, or follow her on Twitter @thereseborchard.
posted July 15, 2008 at 12:25 pm
Eric LOVES you. You are Blessed.
posted July 15, 2008 at 4:25 pm
i agree with m… You are Blessed.
posted July 15, 2008 at 5:12 pm
*blushes*
yeah… my husband is pretty awesome.
i’d better remember to tell him that.
we have this silly routine where i say, “I REALLY like you today.”
he says, “That’s good.”
Me: And I love you more some days than others. Guess what?
Him: What?
Me: Today is one of those days.
—melzoom
posted July 15, 2008 at 5:52 pm
What a very wise and compassionate man you have there. God Bless good timing and you Eric!!! May your angels watch over you both!!! (\o^o/)
posted July 16, 2008 at 7:17 am
Melzoom:
There’s nothing “silly” about your little routine that affirms your love for your husband. How wonderfulthat you can say that you like him as well; they’re quite different emotions, you know, It’s WAY too eay to get caught up in life’s framas and forget to say those things out loud; your routine is a clever way to keep tt from happening to the two of you.
posted July 18, 2008 at 10:00 pm
You are a very blessed lady, to have a husband that is capable of giving you his love and his concern. For myself, and many other people that suffer from depression, our mates are usually not capable of that type of love. I ask myself, so often, what has brought me to choosing men that aren’t available to love. Seems to be a life time path for me.
Sparkleewater