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In my video I mentioned Dr. Abraham Low’s organization, Recovery, Inc.
For those of you not familiar with Recovery, Inc., it is a somewhat old-fashioned but very effective mental health program for persons suffering from depression and other mood disorders. Founded by the neuropsychiatrist Abraham Low in 1937, the program has group meetings every week around the world, similar to 12-step support groups.
Low is sort of a grandpa (or great-grandpa) version of Dr. David Burns, bestselling author of Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy and The Feeling Good Handbook (which I own and use often). Low’s book, Mental Health Through Will Training, offers cognitive-behavioral techniques and methods for handling every day situations.
My great-aunt GiGi was one of the six numbers I kept in my pocket to call every other day during the horrible months of my depression. And Recovery, Inc. saved her life. Low’s book was her Bible. Each page is worn, with notes in the margins and underlined passages. I know this because it sits right next to my computer.
Like me, GiGi had a breakdown in her mid-thirties. She was hospitalized three times. For months, she sent her daughter to live with her sister (my grandmother) because she wasn’t capable of caring for herself, let alone another human being. In her early recovery, she told me that she’d study Low’s book for hours, practicing all the ways she could change her thinking. Thirty years later, she would immediately walk away from any conversation that had the potential to bring her down.
“Oh well enough of that, now tell me about so and so,” she’d say, changing the subject. She knew her limitations–that an ounce of negativity in her brain was toxic, just enough to get the snowball rolling.
“You got to work at it, honey,” she’d tell me every time I called. “The medication has to do its part, and you have to do yours. It’s hard, but eventually you’ll feel better.”
“Do the things that you like to do and are good at,” she added. “Try to stay as busy as you can.”
Her advice was invaluable. And thank God I recorded each of her suggestions. Because GiGi died last May.
My mom sent me GiGi’s Recovery book (Mental Health Through Will Training) last summer. The book–with her name and several addresses crossed out on the front cover–is better than a photograph to remember her by. Because all of the scribbling and the pamphlets and meeting schedules serving as bookmarks point to the sheer determination this woman threw at her recovery. I don’t know anyone–with a possible exception of my guardian angel Ann–who fought harder to stay well.
The book also afforded me a cool glimpse into her soul because tucked between its pages were clipped newspaper articles and magazine pieces from the ’60′s and ’70′s, like “Live Life Abundantly One Day At a Time,” “Philosophy of Optimism Aids Recovery From Depression,” and “Autumn Is Time for Fresh Start.” She hung onto obituaries of people she admired. And, what made me truly weep, were the several holy cards of St. Therese of Lisieux that I found in between Low’s covers.
The morning of GiGi’s funeral was, honest-to-God, the first a.m. I got out of bed without feeling like I was going to vomit. And that peace has stayed (with the occasional blips–like now). Gigi is certainly helping me from a place with no need of puke bags, where I suspect she doesn’t have to say novenas to St. Therese or practice Low’s techniques of positive thinking.
To read more Beyond Blue, go to www.beliefnet.com/beyondblue, and to get to Group Beyond Blue, a support group at Beliefnet Community, click here.
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posted March 9, 2007 at 10:18 am
Thank you so much for posting this blog. It has helped me more than you know possible. I’m having difficulties with depression/seizures in my life right now and I had to let go of a friend ‘coz she was too toxic for me to handle with my battle with depression. She does nothing, but put me down so I really didn’t need to be there and witness any more of her verbal attacks.
posted March 11, 2007 at 3:35 pm
Therese, thank you for this post and for the link talking about your mom’s experience with St. Therese sending roses through someone at just the right time. Reminds me of another Catholic blogger (who passed away a couple of years ago and I can’t think of his name, but Gerard comes to mind) devoted to the Little Flower who often testified how he received roses when he needed an answer to prayer.
posted June 10, 2007 at 9:38 am
Sitting here waking up from another sleepless night of night sweats and possibly going into mania again, and realizing I need to find a psychiatrist fast to get some medication quickly, I say a very short deep hearted prayer, your site pops up with, “Seven ways to calm down”. Praise God for this site. I just relocated to San Diego without medication, but I am living with family so I feel safe.
I decided to go to this church today that a nice neighbor invited me to. I asked God to forgive me for abandoning my cat, and how does He forgive me? I step on the scale to find I’ve lost 1/2 pound (shock!!!) a bunch of emails from the singles websites I belong to(that’s always a nice way to wake up) and beautiful gospel music on my new found radio station. I am in heaven with all this. Forgiveness is so awesome. Now I pray I can make friends with this kitty cat that is here in our complex and go ask the man that invited me to church for prayer. I am shaking a little bit but, it could be because it’s chilly and I am running a low grade fever from my tooth. My heart is racing so fast it woke me up last night and I am spending money like crazy again, which are the symtoms of mania. Thank you for being my new friend.
posted June 11, 2007 at 7:29 am
Thank you so much for the Novena to St. Therese. I started it tonight. God bless and keep you all safe in the palm of His Hand.
posted June 19, 2007 at 8:31 pm
I am so glad you had your great-aunt Gigi. When you are going through depression, there is no one that can comfort you as much as someone who knows what you are going through. I look forward to getting a copy of the book that great-aunt Gigi found useful. We can learn so much from each other when we share. Thank you for sharing.
posted September 28, 2007 at 8:32 am
Old fashion, yes. Effective. You bet it is!
Thank for the story of your Aunt GiGi. I know what a life saver and life changer that book by Low can be. I had it on the shelf for a year or two before I picked it up. And it wasn’t until I went to a Recovery meeting that I started to truly read it with hope.
Fourteen months later my life is much better. My emotions still cause some problems yet there is huge change for the better. I’ll use a number for more clarity. My internal conflict is 15% to 20% of what it was before I started Recovey.
It is a great group of people.
Thanks again.
posted July 10, 2008 at 8:23 am
How blessed you were to have had your Great Aunt Gigi in your life! And how selfless of you to share her with all of us. Thanks, T!
And to JJ: get yourself to a pdoc in your new location lickety split. These other things are helpful, but(at least in MY case) the pharmacueticals are absolutely key to my recovery. If you can’t get to a pdoc right away, howabout asking your old one to submit a script to one of the nationwide pharnacies that has a branch in your new home? Most of those allow you to fill a script in ANYof their stores. I had to do this one summernot long ago when I forgot my meds going to spend a week at our family cabin in the northern Michigan woods, and it worked well for me. Good luck
posted July 12, 2008 at 5:59 pm
I totally concur it is a wonderful thing to have someone who has walked through your hell and remained intact. It is a sign of hope, Thankyou Therese. That’s a jewel I can keep for a rainy day.