Beyond Blue

Beyond Blue

John Grohol: 12 Most Annoying Bad Habits of Therapists

posted by Beyond Blue | 5:27pm Tuesday March 10, 2009

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This post by John Grohol had me cracking up. I’m including his intro and first three annoying habits, and then you’ll have to visit his site to get the others. I think the only thing I can add to the list is that I didn’t really like it when one of my shrinks asked me to help her with a book contract. Actually. I think I offered to help. But that’s when I knew it was time to go shrink shopping again.
Psychotherapy is a unique relationship, a kind of connection that is unlike any other kind of relationship a person has in their life. In some ways, it can be more intimate than our most intimate relationships, but it also paradoxically values a vestige of professional distance between therapist and client.
Therapists, alas, are just as human as the clients they see and come with the same human foibles. They have bad habits, as we all do, but some of those habits have the very real potential of interfering with the psychotherapy process and the unique psychotherapy relationship.
So without further ado, here are twelve things you wish your therapist didn’t do — some of which may actually harm the psychotherapeutic relationship.
1. Showing up late for the appointment.
Therapists will usually charge a client for an appointment if they fail to cancel it with less than 24 hours notice. Yet some therapists seem perfectly oblivious to the clock when it comes to showing up on time for appointments. While the occasional lateness may be excused, some therapists seem to be living in another time zone altogether and consistently show up late for their appointments with their clients — anywhere from 5 minutes to even two hours! Chronic lateness is often symptomatic of poor time management skills.
2. Eating in front of the client.
Unless you have enough for everyone, eating and drinking during a psychotherapy appointment is considered ill-mannered. Some therapists offer clients the same access to coffee or water that they themselves enjoy. (If you’re going to drink something in front of a client, make sure you offer your client the same.) Eating while in session — by client or therapist — is never appropriate (it’s therapy, not mealtime). And asking, “Do you mind if I finish my lunch while we get started?” is inappropriate — clients don’t always feel comfortable enough with expressing their true feelings.
3. Yawning or sleeping during session.
Yes, believe it or not, there are therapists who fall asleep during session. And while an occasional yawn is a normal component of our daily functioning, non-stop yawning is usually only interpreted one way by a client — they are boring the therapist. Therapists need to get a good night’s sleep every night, or else they cannot be effective in their job (which requires constant and consistent attention and concentration).
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still shopping

posted March 12, 2009 at 10:34 am


my experience has been the psychologist sits there for 5 minutes asking overview questions, with a prescription pad in hand, never taking the time to get to know your life background, and treating the entire soul underlying issues. 15 minutes they are done because they control the meeting and make me feel that I am a burden if more than 15 minutes are used, BUT they BILL THE INSURANCE CO FOR THE ENTIRE HOUR… so 4 clients an hour at your full rate,,,, that is self serving and not the patient,,,,
prescription is their only goal, and what is the kickback on that on top of overcharging?
dump them and find someone that really services you, by starting an overview of childhood to now,, all unresolved issues you have been living with, and gives you constructive feed back, and charges you for the time actually spent with you.
9wq339



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Ella

posted March 12, 2009 at 11:42 pm


How about the following:
Many years ago when five dollars went much further than they do today, and when it took longer to earn it, I had a therapist who, whenever he found out I had gotten a $5/week raise, immediately informed that his fee has gone up by – you guessed
it – $5.
I had a woman therapist who was elderly, probably never married.
After I went through an excruciating break-up with someone I loved,
she taunted me by flippantly asking, “Well? Was it worth it?”
Needless to say, she is no longer my therapist.



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