5 Ways Churches Can Minister to Those with Mental Illness

you are totally freakin amazing therese!! jesus is definelty going to give you the helping people with mental illness crown when we get up to heaven.

This is a fantastic suggestion. I do hope people bring this suggestion to their pastor/rabbi/spritiual leader. thank you so much for your courage.

Hi Therese:

I have just begun a few weeks ago reading your columns and viewing some of your podcasts. I have to tell you that I feel very grateful that you are around. I have had quite a lot to deal with in the past few weeks or so. I have mental illness and have been struggling with faith myself. I also wanted to thank you for your suggestion about Anne Morrow's book on one of your podcasts. You have had a great impact on my life thus far and I hardly know you.

Thank you,

Colie

Therese, I sometimes think I must be the only person diagnosed with bipolar disorder and generalized anxiety who doesn't find peace and security in faith. I don't know why, but fostering a belief in a higher power has caused me nothing but misery and pain. I tried prayer, going to church, bible studies, and nothing did me any good. Different religious beliefs and practices have the same effect. Nothing feels right, nothing touches me on a personal level. I was desperate for a religious or spiritual experience that would touch my heart and point me down the right path. I no longer burn with the desire to find a higher power, because after years, even decades, of searching, I haven't found anything but anguish and agony. I am glad that seemingly everyone but myself can find peace and solace in a higher power, that they have a support, in times of trouble, someone or some thing that provides them with strength and comfort. I envy others for this, but I'm not bitter towards them. They have something wonderful, a true blessing. I wish I could say the same for myself.

Therese, there are parishes in the US who do minister to those of us dealing with mental illness. I did a search and tried to start a program with the blessings of the priests but it just didn't work out. The programs are prayer centered and educational. Once a month prayer meetings and then yearly info workshops.It would be great to not have to deal with the fear factor. I was a very well educated social worker and found my midlife breakdown extremely shameful and embarressing. It was as damaaging to me as to others that knew me at that time. I am still in recovery with these feelings.If we could only get to the AA level of acceptence in society. I think we need more witnessing - more lay people doing the homily.My great uncle did a PHD disteration at the Catholic University of America when he was blacklisted as a priest on Scrupulosity. To read it is sad and he advocated for "mental hygiene" classes for all Catholich High School students.It's a tough one to sort out but at least we have a start.

Vincent,

I can hear the longing for God in your posting. Our life experiences can either help us in the search for faith, or be a hindrance. If there is someone you respect for their faith, perhaps you can ask him or her to be a spiritual guide or mentor. Not every religious practice or study will be of help. But sometimes you have to start with one thing, stick with it, and allow it to grow in you. I found that being in a long-term Bible study layed a foundation that has helped me greatly over the years. It helped me begin to think of God in more personal terms. In doing so, it has helped my prayer life.

For me, praying to a "higher power" doesn't work. I can't converse with an intelligence - I need a person. I can't often remember specific Biblical passages, but Psalms 139 is one that has stuck over the years. David is speaking about how God has known him even before he was born. Psalms 27 is another favorite. My counselor pointed that one out to me. The line that my counselor gave me is verse 10 - even if mother and father forsake me, yet You will not forget me.

I feel so inadequate to address your posting. But I want you to know that there is a person who read your words and wanted to offer you support. If an ordinary person like myself feels great compassion for your longing, I can only say it is because God has placed that compassion within me. And can God grant us something that is not part of God himself? I believe that God has placed within you the desire to know him, and he will not forsake or forget you.

Barbara, I have tried bible studies, for over three years, and I was baptized. None of it did any good, and I opened myself to God, or whatever name he goes by. The more I prayed and studied the bible, the worse my depression and suicidal thoughts became. I looked into other religions, I researched other cultures' belief systems. Bhuddism, Hinduism, Native American, Paganism, Wicca, Bahai, Islam, and others. None of them gave me anything positive, no peace of mind, no sense of serenity or security. I feel angry sometimes, frustrated that so many others have this relationship with a higher power, or God, however you want to refer to it, but I don't. I don't have anything, and it eats at me, it's like a gnat flying around my head, I can't get rid of it and it drives me crazy. I feel like I'm the only one who has this problem. Not very realistic, maybe, but that's how I feel. Very much alone. Very much hurting.

Hello again, Vincent.

First of all, I think it is important to seek professional treatment for your depression, as it sounds like you have been trying to cope with it for a long time. I have a counselor that I've been seeing regularly for years. I was very fortunate in the person I found, because he treats the whole person. Many counselors ignore the spiritual side of people, and I think that is a mistake. Additionally, I have been on an antidepressant for almost as long. The combination of talk therapy and medication has made a real difference.

As I said in my first comment, life experiences can be a help or a hindrence in our relationship with God. As I've progressed through counseling, I have gradually found a greater ability to pray, something that was almost impossible prior. You have to find the right combination for you. Scripture works for me. Being a member of a small congregation has made me feel less alone. The only person aware of my personal situation is the pastor, who has been genuinely caring.

As I reread your entry the thought came to me about how some people spend their lives searching for love, when love is really the by-product of a relationship. Could it be as you desperately seek peace, you are missing the opportunity for the relationship to develop?

Please know that I am not being at all critical or trying to diagnose. You have probably heard it all before, but sensing your situation, I want to reach out and help if I can.

Barbara, thank you for your kindness, and Your Name also. Thank you both. I do currently take medication for the bipolar disorder and the anxiety. I used to be in counseling, but that didn't help me, as I think the counselor was treating me as just one more patient, one more file in the filing cabinet. I understand how any counselor or therapist, psychiatrist, or any other professional could become indifferent to the patients they see. Some level of detachment is needed, for maintaining a professional relationship, and probably their own sanity! But it's that indifference to the patient's pain that drove me to stop seeing my counselor. I don't need someone pretending to care about me and my problems. I don't need someone to judge me even while they're sitting there listening to me pour out my soul to them. I'm more than capable of judging myself. And yes, I did try to develop a relationship with God, or however you want to refer to him/ her. I tried prayer, but it's difficult, after awhile, to keep praying to someone or something you don't feel is there. The bible, and the people at church, say that you shouldn't base your beliefs, your faith, on feelings. I'm sorry, but I can't do that, I can't disregard my feelings. If I feel something to be true, then I have to go with those feelings, wherever they guide me. I think there's more reliability and truth in what I feel than there is in some book that was written thousands of years before I was even born, by people I never met. At least I know where my feelings come from, I look at this person every time I look into a mirror. I know myself better than some dead guy who wrote something down three thousand years before I came waltzing along. If God is real, and wants to talk with me, why the subterfuge? Why not give me something that leaves no room for doubt? Then, at least I'd know he was real, and could decide from there where to go.

Vincent, I meant to address you directly in my last post.
You are NOT alone in your thinking. Reading your words, I thought - oh, I've had this conversation before - with my own son. He too doesn't know what to feel, or how to feel about any higher power. He (very lightly) explored Buddhism and also tried going to my church's youth group services a few times, and also attending with me once or twice. He is not comfortable in that setting at all. Sometimes I feel that is my fault, that he has no faith. When he was young, I wouldn't take him anyplace that he'd have to sit quietly for any period of time, as I knew that would end up in a very loud disaster. Both of us now, are a little on the recluse side of the coin. I've alienated myself over that past 14 years simply by staying home with my son and caring for him, rather than going out after work, and having an adult social life. My son, with his anxieties has become the one afraid to spend much time in public, feeling that he is being judged by "everyone out there".
Still I pray though. I pray for him, and I'll add you to my prayers as well Vincent. I hope you'll visit my website and friend me. Take heart in knowing this if nothing else. You are NOT alone, and there are people out here who do care, and who do understand.

I am asking any of you readers to share with me and others if any of your friends or loved ones have hurt your feelings by being jealous that you live at home with your parent even though I am an adult. My mom and I are both on SSI so we are very low income. I have this friend from church who recently stated this comment about our singles guy leader who lives with his mom. She said we need to get out in the real world and pay 600 or 700 per month for rent. She is very cold hearted, bitter, and I think jealous of those who get a check from the government. It is not our fault we suffer from an mental illness.