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The following passage is from Henri Nouwen’s book, “The Inner Voice of Love”:
Try to keep your small, fearful self close to you. This is going to be a struggle, because you have to live for a while with the “not yet.” Your deepest, truest self is not yet home. It quickly gets scared. Since your intimate self does not feel safe with you, it continues to look for others, especially those who offer it some real, though temporary, consolation. But when you become more childlike, it will no longer feel the need to dwell elsewhere. It will begin to look to YOU as home.
Be patient. When you feel lonely, stay with your loneliness. Avoid the temptation to let your fearful self run off. Let it teach you its wisdom; let it tell you that you can live instead of just surviving. Gradually you will become one, and you will find that [God] is living in your heart and offering you all you need.
To read more Beyond Blue, go to www.beliefnet.com/beyondblue, and to get to Group Beyond Blue, a support group at Beliefnet Community, click here.
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Therese J. Borchard writes the daily blog, Beyond Blue, on Beliefnet and is a regular contributor to the award-winning blog, World of Psychology, on Psych Central. Therese is the author of Beyond Blue: Surviving Depression & Anxiety and Making the Most of Bad Genes and The Pocket Therapist: An Emotional Survival Kit. Subscribe to Beyond Blue, visit her website, or follow her on Twitter @thereseborchard.
Meet others on the journey in
Therese’s community group
Ask Therese to be your friend
Therese J. Borchard writes the daily blog, Beyond Blue, on Beliefnet and is a regular contributor to the award-winning blog, World of Psychology, on Psych Central. Therese is the author of Beyond Blue: Surviving Depression & Anxiety and Making the Most of Bad Genes and The Pocket Therapist: An Emotional Survival Kit. Subscribe to Beyond Blue, visit her website, or follow her on Twitter @thereseborchard.
posted July 30, 2009 at 2:11 am
I think this is the first time I have commented on a piece on Beliefnet.
These words mean a lot to me. I am a single mother with no family worth talking about, and the truth is that my friendships tend to be superficial.
Nevertheless, I long for companionship. I always have done and most of my life has been painfully lonely.
I have been a phone addict, phoning people on the least pretext just to connect with someone. I have hated myself for being this way, especially when it was obvious that the person on the other end didn’t particularly want to hear from me.
Now I am telling myself that all that I require, all the love and friendship, is inside of me. These words, I hope, will help me.
Thank you, Therese!