Advertisement
Hara Estroff Marano penned a fascinating article about jealousy called “Jealousy: Love’s Destroyer” in the last issue of “Psychology Today.” Since this deadly sin is one of my most unbecoming qualities–or so I have been told by friends–I was anxious to find out, perhaps, why I am so jealousy and what I can do about it.
The article, which you can get to by clicking here, covers several aspects of jealousy that I’ve never thought about before: why we need it, what it looks like on brain-imagining scans, the difference between men’s jealousy and women’s, and how it can actually improve a relationship, and stimulate new growth in a person’s life.
Following are a couple of excerpts.
Jealousy has long been deemed the guardian of love. But more often it’s love’s downfall. We typically blame our partner for paying attention to another, but the real issue may be what jealousy teaches us about ourselves.
According to University of Texas psychologist David Buss, jealousy is a necessary emotion, a potential deterrent to infidelity that arises in both men and women when a threat materializes to intimate relationships. Boyfriend talks to beautiful woman at party and smiles admiringly at her; to girlfriend, a rival is born, a flesh-and-blood warning that what she thought was hers might now be endangered. Or wife suddenly embarks on series of brief out-of-town trips with co-head of her team. What is at stake is survival of our most valued relationships and thus the future of our children–which is to say, the species.
To read the Psychology Today article click here.
* Click here to subscribe to Beyond Blue! And click here to follow Therese on Twitter. And click here to join Group Beyond Blue, a depression support group. Now stop clicking.
|
Previous Posts
The 8 Best Spiritual Sound Bites of Graduation Advice
posted 6:00:46am May. 22, 2012 | read full post »
Struggle With, Not Victory Over
posted 6:18:15am May. 21, 2012 | read full post »
Ring the Bells That Still Can Ring
posted 6:13:58am May. 17, 2012 | read full post »
Label Me, Please
posted 6:00:59am May. 15, 2012 | read full post »
In Sickness and In Health
posted 6:00:56am May. 15, 2012 | read full post » |
|
||
|
|
||
| click here to see all of our uplifting newsletters» |
Meet others on the journey in
Therese’s community group
Ask Therese to be your friend
Therese Borchard is the author of Beyond Blue: Surviving Depression & Anxiety and Making the Most of Bad Genes and The Pocket Therapist: An Emotional Survival Kit. Subscribe to Beyond Blue, visit her website, or follow her on Twitter @thereseborchard.
Meet others on the journey in
Therese’s community group
Ask Therese to be your friend
Therese Borchard is the author of Beyond Blue: Surviving Depression & Anxiety and Making the Most of Bad Genes and The Pocket Therapist: An Emotional Survival Kit. Subscribe to Beyond Blue, visit her website, or follow her on Twitter @thereseborchard.
posted August 19, 2009 at 9:10 pm
An interesting take on jealousy. Food for thought. I always thought it was a toxic emotion; interesting to contemplate it as adaptive.
Love the photo!
posted August 20, 2009 at 6:38 pm
Incredibly right on information for me. It still is a problem and has affected our marriage. I need to work on myself. Wish I would have learned this a long time ago. Thanks, Therese.