Image by of Kris Timken/Corbis"Time Magazine" just published the results of a landmark survey gauging where America stands on the battle of the sexes. The results show that women are much more powerful than they were 40 years ago. In the 60s, one-third of all workers were woman. Now half are. Almost 40 percent of women are the primary breadwinners or are contributing substantial income for the household budget. And according to a Mediamark Research & Intelligence survey, women make 75 percent of the buying decisions in the home. You know the telemarketer who asked for the decision-maker of the house? Apparently it's the wife.
Women's power extends to the academic world, as well. Author Nancy Gibbs explains in "Time" that half of Ivy League presidents are women, and the female dropout rate has been cut in half since the 70s. Also, the ratio of 60-40 of men and women on college campuses has reversed. Moreover, half of all law and medical degrees go to women.
But they are stressed, anxious, and not as happy.
Why?
According to the poll results, both men and women say that the government and businesses haven't adjusted to the revolution and need to do more to help families manage it all. For example, 54 percent of women and 49 percent of men say businesses need to be more flexible with work hours and schedules; they also agreed that companies need to give more paid time off, better or more day-care options, and longer school days or longer school years.
But are women really less happy than they were back in the day we wore pearls with our aprons and greeting Dad at the door when he arrived home from work, the turkey roasting in the oven?
Gibbs writes, "It may be that women have become more honest with the same pressures and conflicts that once accounted for greater male unhappiness. Or that modern life in a global economy is simply more stressful for everyone but especially for women, who are working longer hours while playing quarterback at home."
I think she nailed it there. It's comparable to therapy. Before you sit yourself on that couch, you think have a few problems, but you're not sure what they are. Then the therapist starts prodding you, and yikes! You got yourselves a lot of bloody problems.
From my perspective, I do think I have a more fulfilling life in that I have to use my head for more things than figuring out why the Bendaroos we ordered from the infomercial sucks in comparison to what they promised us. But my job does bring a considerable amount of stress. So I'm happier in one sense, and much more anxious and stress in another. Like Gibbs says, I am probably experiencing the male stress--the pressure transforming ideas and brain power into cash to buy dinner--than many women just simply didn't experience 30 or 40 years ago.
This is the part in a post that I usually say something that makes you feel better. Like, oh but it's going to get easier next month.
I don't have any answers. But I'm glad someone at least asked the question because now I know I'm not alone in feeling like I'm one lousy juggler.
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There is a HUGE difference between being strong and being masculine - it seems to me as though women today are more intent on being masculine rather than being strong. It's scary when you walk down the street and see very little in the way of femininity. Every woman looks like a cyborg listening to their iPods - you'd better not get in their way, either! LOL
Sad...
There are some cultures in the world, where the middle class woman "housewife," was so powerful, and yes, the decision maker, not only in consumer decisions, but also in major decisions such as child-rearing. One would be surprised to hear that actually took place and is still silently taking place to some extent, in these cultures, in a country considered backward, and abusive of women!!
Unfortunately, women in these very same countries, and I'm embarrassed to say I'm one of them, have wrestled the right to use their brains to generate revenue. The result? These women are now multi-tasking to glory, trying to be super-wives, super-moms, and doing their 24x7 jobs, while preparing dinner, and helping a child with homework. Stress, of course. Freedom, and feeling of liberation? Maybe yes, maybe no...each case is different. Worth monitoring!
What about all the grandparents that are raising the grandchildren? Whose problem has this become? When grandparents are suppose to visit with the grandchildren, but now they are in a position were they are raising them? Tell me how this situation has become more realistic over the past fifteen or twenty years? Either both parents are unavailable because of a domestic problem or they are both in jail! Some women lose custody of their children because they don't have any other housing to go to other than at the same residence where the domestic violence took place. If they put the child or children in a violent atmosphere, then she is charged with reckless endangerment of a minor. The child or children are taken away and put in foster care for a period of time. Hopefully the mother or father can change their residence so that the children can return to them, but only when it is proven that the children will be safe in the new residence. We can only hope that situations will change.
Wow, reading all these posts makes me realize there is more than one side to the story. MEN too, have their issues with stress in today's chaotic world.
I think it's important to take a step back sometimes and look at the whole scenario. At certain periods in your life it might be better to be home with your children (and it doesn't necessarily have to be the mom in all cases). Let's look at what kind of a world we are creating before jumping on a bandwagon just because we "can." At the same time, it's good to have choices and women today have more options than perhaps women of 50 years ago. Let's ALL be all that we can be, but not forget the children in the process. Think about what is best for your own situation at this point in your life, and proceed from there.
Must disagree with Kim near the top. Some women might be working outside the home to feel important, but, believe me, many go to work because hubby isn't earning enough for the daily bread. It's easy to generalize, but where does this stop? Before we know it, we'll be saying that women don't need to go to school because it's the men who have to work. An education, knowledge and the possibility of employment and career advancement do provide a measure of freedom for women and should not be taken away. It's how women actually USE these freedoms which may or may not determine their stress levels. You can throw in motivation and level of personal gain in there as well. Every single woman has to decide things in such a way that life suits her, and not the other way around. Since when have we fooled ourselves thinking that our lives are only meant for others? Please, please, we live first of all for ourselves. That is a fundamental truth and no one should spend their lives denying it.
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