May 2006 Archives

Poor Chattering Mind. The other Chatterings make ruthless fun of her for screeching, "Get your head away from the microwave oven when it's running! It will scorch your brain, you fool!"

Yes, I know there are better ways to convey my feelings, but why, oh why doesn't anyone just go along with me on this one?

Our seven-year-old, built-in microwave is positioned right at brain level. And yes, I could offer you information that says microwaves are perfectly safe , and information that says they may pose risks . (I really worry about people who work for years next to them in convenience stores and restaurants.)

But I cling to this fact: A friend of mine who used to work at the FCC (Federal Communications Commission) told me the technicians there always kept their distance from the microwave ovens in the staff lunchroom. "Huh? What does that mean?" I asked my friend. "Everything in moderation," he replied.

Risky to work next to when in operation or not, microwave ovens are so fast, so slick, so convenient, that even I succumb occasionally. Today, I was about to microwave last night's leftover collard greens (refrigerated on a plate with a side of farro). But then I spied a clean frying pan, on top of the range beckoning me. Oh, I'll just warm my little meal in that, I said.

The aroma of greens and grains quickly filled the kitchen. Some of the collards got nice and crisp at the edge. I sat down with my beautiful, steaming bowl and thought: This is delicious. I'm so glad I didn't microwave it.

Photo by Kiwi Nessie

My friend Myra Klockenbrink, who will soon graduate from the Integrative Nutrition Institute, has introduced me to a new whole grain (actually, it's a very ancient one): farro!

"Farro (pronounced FAHR-oh) was one of the first grains known to man and kernels have been discovered in Egyptian tombs," writes Italian food expert Michele Topor. "For centuries, this ancient unhybridized form of wheat has been grown throughout the Mediterranean basin. Farro gave rise to the Italian word for flour, farina. It was the standard ration for Roman Legions that expanded through the Western World."

Ask for it at your local health food store. It cooks up like rice or barley, is wonderful in soups, and has a stick-to-your-ribs quality. We ate it last night as a side dish with a bit of sea salt and organic butter. I could see it as a breakfast cereal with milk, currants, ground flax seed, and maple syrup. Or as a cold salad. Here's a farro with tomatoes and herbs recipe.

"The ones who count are those persons who--though they may be of little renown--respond to and are responsible for the continuation of the living spirit, each in the active stillness of his sphere of work."

--Martin Buber

"I find myself saying briefly and prosaically that it is much more important to be oneself than anything else. Do not dream of influencing other people, I would say, if I knew how to make it sound exalted. Think of things in themselves."

--Virginia Woolf

"I have many memories of quiet times in my life: an evening hearing frogs croak by the lake; an evening hearing catfish hit the bottom of a boat; the straightness of the pine trees in Mississippi; the Evergreens and Aspens of Colorado; the pastures seen out of the passing train window; an Elk calf in the grass at dawn; and sunrise at Chincoteague and Assateague Islands as the calm boats come back into the shore. All of these have been quiet moments of reflection I've enjoyed during varying spiritual retreats I've gone on. 'He maketh me to lie down in green pastures. He leadeth me beside still waters. He restoreth my soul.' Psalms 23:2."

--from reader Jeannette Strubhar

Photo by Aard_vark

I spent eleven hours training last week with Reiki master Pamela Miles, author of "Reiki: A Comprehensive Guide." She speaks accessibly on the topic and seems to understand and have contacts within the mainstream medical community. It seems like she...

My husband Mr. Chattering (a.k.a. Steve Waldman) and Beliefnet.com spirituality editor Valerie Reiss (who'll be blogging for me while I vacation in two weeks) have a short "Periscope" item in the current issue of Newsweek in which they define what...

Malas are strings of beads on which to count repeated mantras (words of spiritual or religious meaning). Last night, while researching the female bodhisattva of compassion Quan Yin (thinking I'd like to wear her in the form of a necklace...

I'm always looking for gifts for people who are ill, gifts other than flowers that stimulate allergies, or plants that need watering in the hospital room. Here's an article I once wrote on the subject. Now I have some additional...

"If you're trying to figure out what's coming next, turn off everything you own that has an 'off' switch, and listen. Make up some plans and be willing to change them on a dime. Identify your heart's truest desire and...

"...we must understand that meditation, the centerpiece of the Buddhist path, is itself the most radical kind of political action. Why? In meditation, we step out of the value system of the conventional world and start to look at things...

My friend Nell Minow introduced me to the most marvelous "contemplative photography" website last night. It's called "Miksang," a word that means "good eye" in Tibetan, and it was launched by Nova Scotian photographer Michael Wood. He blends his own...

Nice editorial from David Brooks in The New York Times yesterday on how to develop a public policy that might bolster the brain power of our children. He concludes--surprise, surprise--that love is all they need."Kids learn from people they love....

"Sweetheart," I said last night while sitting in the dark on the edge of my son's bed. "When I come in here to wake you in the morning, I notice that you're all scrunched up in a little ball, like...

"During Gemini’s transit, the Sun sails toward its northernmost limit on the horizon. North is a cardinal direction which in many cultures represents "knowledge and wisdom"—and so your journey in Gemini is also towards gaining more knowledge. Gemini takes us...

"Sacred and profane. What a gulf, what antipathy there is between those words! Yet all that 'profane' originally meant in its Latin root was 'outside the temple,' and later, still neutrally, in medieval Latin and French, 'not pertaining to what...

"Retreat a la you sounds like big $," writes CM reader Sharon in response to my post about my five-day retreat last summer. Au contraire! The best, most spiritual retreats at monasteries and convents are sometimes the cheapest! Really! And...

"I've learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way he/she handles these three things: a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights."--Maya AngelouPhoto by Louise...

Thanks to CM reader Daria for sending me the link to Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep, an organization that helps parents of dying and deceased infants find volunteer photographers to capture their newborn and family free of charge--sometimes...

Last Friday evening, I attended a service in honor of my son's Hebrew school teachers. At that gathering the rabbi reminded us that the weekend always arrives but that the Sabbath (which, as you may know, for Jews lasts 24...

We know we should do one thing at a time. When chopping onions, for instance, it's best to chop with the whole mind, and not talk on the phone or listen to the radio. We also know it's best to...

"Being is meditating twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week. Behavior as it is normally defined no longer exists... Accordngly, being is an optimal state. Plus, you're not just passively hanging around, letting things happen to you; you have...

"I will focus my energy on my true intentions. I will not be distracted by noise, chatter or setbacks. Patience, commitment, grace, and purpose will guide me." --Peg Streep, "The Woman's Book of Guardians: Divine Guides, Muses, Totems, and Protectors...

Wedding season has begun! Did you know that August is the busiest month for weddings, with June a close second? This means that gossip-magazine moment is upon us--when the wedding party's personalities come out to strut. That's right, I'm talking...

"Town & Country," the ultimate American "high society" magazine, has published a marvelous tribute to the "power of philanthropy" for the second year in a row, really demonstrating how socially conscious and helpful a glossy, jewelry-ad-backed magazine can be. In...

As the voice of a loving friend, I insist that you take time off this summer, not to vacation, but just to be by yourself. That's right, just you and you. I happen to know you have a sufficient number...

I'm sitting at my desk eating Himalania organic sundried goji berries. They're coral-red, raisin-like berries that you can soak in tea, cook into breads, and blend into smoothies. But I'm munching them out of the package, three or four at...

Here's a poem and ritual Paula Morhardt of Stockton, Illinois, recommends for childbirth in the Spring 20006 issue of "Circle Magazine: Celebrating Nature, Spirit, and Magic."Place a piece of jasper, preferably green, on the stomach of the birthing mother. Placing...

Yesterday a CM reader mentioned the debilitating pain and suffering of fibromyalgia. I'm aware of this disease because until recently my older sister has been under the cloud of it for four years--immersed in pain, aggravation, and worry. "If I...

I wrote of Eve Ensler's body acceptance campaign last week, and echoed the notion that everyone should love their rounded mid-sections (men, don't stop reading here--your belly is not exempt). While it's true that belly acceptance is a good first...

I've been following Patty Lemer's writings on autism spectrum disorders for years. Lemer is the co-founder of Developmental Delay Resources, a non-profit organization integrating conventional and holistic therapies for children with sensory-system challenges. Years ago, without payment or complaint, she...

Well, thank goodness for the high-speed Internet access in most hotels these days, for I'm sitting by my lonesome in a Holiday Inn. It's eleven o'clock at night, and after reading and sipping spring water in the Columbia, South Carolina,...

This month's "Vanity Fair" features a long profile of TV personality Anderson Cooper and includes a photograph of CNN's hottest correspondent working on the bed of a New Orleans hotel room with his portable computer resting on his outstretched thighs....

The Hummingbirdsby Charlotte Smith Minutest of the feathered kind,Possessing every charm combined,Nature, in forming thee, designed A proof within how little spaceShe can comprise such perfect grace,Rendering the lovely; fairy race You'll find more hummingbird poems here!...

I spent five days in South Carolina watching my father's hummingbird feeder and I didn't spy a single hummer even though my dad's live-in caretaker said only days ago that she saw seven different ones. I have compensated by researching...

In her latest play "The Good Body," "Vagina Monologue" playwright Eve Ensler lifts her shirt to reveal her own "flabby, post-40 stomach" to a grateful audience. In the June issue of "O," on page 217, Ensler does the same thing....

In the airport last night, on my way to South Carolina to visit my dad, I purchased the latest copies of "O" (Oprah's magazine) and "Spa." My chattering assumption (I could hear it loud and clear) was that in "Spa"...

Oh! This is such fun: here's the link to Shelley Ackerman's guide to what to give your mother this Sunday, organized by astrological sign....

I think you'll like this essay by Katherine Ozment, a mom who reflects on the day her small son served as ring boy at a gay wedding. LiteraryMama.com, the online lit mag that published this piece, is always brimming with...

Mother's Day is not easy for those whose moms didn't "deliver," or for those whose moms are dead. Here's a user-generated article from Beliefnet.com's Mother's Day package, helpful to those feeling distanced from the upcoming commemoration on Sunday. My own...

Imagine inviting a friend into your home for a visit and a long talk. Then imagine serving something as beautiful as these hand-tied tea blossoms in a clear mug of hot water. You could be discussing the saddest thing: a...

We let the young Chatterings stay up the other night to see if David Blaine could hold his breath under water for nine minutes (who knew ABC's program would run on until 10 p.m.?). Next morning: uh-oh. Younger Chattering woke...

Will David Blaine's breath-holding stunt encourage others to explore the yogi-like ability to slow down the heartbeat, still their metabolism, and stay super calm? Or is there a masochistic character to the man's pranks? Is he shortening his life? Or...

"Pray as if everything depends upon God; act as if everything depends upon you."--Abraham Joshua Heschel....

Every time I go to synagogue with my husband and kids, one or two passages will leap off the prayer book page and touch me deeply. Here's one I gravitated toward last Friday at Temple Beth Elohim, on the eve...

Today, I noodled around a website called GreenHome.com, and I realized, quite frankly, that I'm not as green as I like to think. Green Home markets a vast collection of hard-to-find products, all environmentally sound. I like the site's no-frills...

I upset a reader last Sunday with my post that said that while I favor natural medicines to conventional ones, I am trying not to judge those who go the conventional route because I've come to see that mood-altering medicines...

When I look back on the days when I was either nursing or carrying my children constantly, I remember two things: The way Mr. Chattering would rush home to help me (since he's generally worked in offices and I've mostly...

Has anything happened recently to make you feel stuck in an unpleasant place? We live in an era when so many medicines are available to help us escape hardship: drugs for sleeplessness, anxiety, to alter heartache of grief. After years...

"Anger does not require hostile acting out. First and foremost, it is a physiological process to be experienced. Second, it has cognitive value--it provides essential information. Since anger does not exist in a vacuum, if I feel anger it must...

Regarding my frantic search for lip balm, I got this nice post from CM reader Ursula. Thanks! Einstein says 'God is in the details,' and your experience in finding the lip balm just as you were about giving up is...

"Leadership can be thought of as a capacity to define oneself to others in a way that clarifies and expands a vision of the future."--Rabbi Edwin H. Friedman...

My lips have been chapped for a couple of days, and I've been feeling too busy to do anything about it. I tried tiny fingertip doses of cocoa butter and moisturizing cream, but nope, nothing but lip balm will do...

I asked you to send me your spiritual quandaries, and got some fine ones. CM reader Kathy wrote of the subtle but vicious power struggles within the leadership of her metaphysical church. You don't need the particulars. But something tells...

"Practicing on only one level of your being will not enlighten all of you. If you just meditate, your psychodynamic 'junk' will not automatically go away. If you just meditate, your job or your relationship with your spouse will not...

It is not the language of painters but the language of nature which one should listen to...The feeling for the things themselves, for reality, is more important than the feeling for pictures.--Vincent Van Gogh...

"Movie Mom" Nell Minow interviewed "Akeelah and the Bee" producer/actor Laurence Fishburne for Beliefnet.com, and the Williamson quote came up in conversation. Here's an excerpt: Minow: The film makes great use of Marianne Williamson’s wonderful quote, “Our deepest fear is...

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure," begins the famous quote recently used so effectively in the whole-family movie "Akeelah and the Bee." Print it out! Hang it...

Sam Harris, author of "The End of Faith," is the new face of American atheism. Even though I don't buy his whole argument, he makes fascinating points. Plus, he's cool, charismatic. And he meditates! See him lament the incompatible claims...

In her latest nutritional newsletter, New York-based health and wellness expert Myra Klockenbrink encouraged people to visit their neighborhood grassy areas to pick young, serrated dandelion greens. She included a recipe for sautéing the greens with minced onion (or shallot),...

The gorgeous blessing I published yesterday turns out to be Irish. That's not too surprising, is it? And in response to one reader's question, a lintel is a horizontal structural beam that spans any architectural opening, usually a door. Here...

My friend Frances Stahnke, director of the a yoga studio in Northern Virginia, wrote me with the following morning meditation and blessing, which she says came to her "on the spirit airways" Monday morning. You may recite it or think...

"Is your mom mom-ish?" I overheard my older son ask another boy once. When he said it, I felt my own mom-ishness presented to me as a high concept. One wouldn't want to be too mom-ish, would one? A little...

I like the old-fashioned idea of hanging a framed prayer or poem near a home's entrance to bless the house, so I was happy to find this hand-written blessing that's probably sixty years old at a Brooklyn flea market this...

Yesterday, I was standing in the elevator of Bloomingdale's Manhattan flagship store with a red-headed saleswoman who had sold me a pair of earrings ten minutes earlier. "I actually came here to buy something to wear to my nephew's bar...

One thing great about getting older: You realize that clothes don't matter. The cut, the style, the trendiness of whatever you've got on, BLAH! Those things don't influence what you telegraph. ALL of them are subservient to...to what? Can you...