On the wings of a snow-white Dove

Benny Hinn is tired of flying commercial. Benny Hinn wants a Gulfstream jet. Benny Hinn has already taken delivery on a new Gulfstream jet, and wants you to pay for it, because "it is the only we Pastor Benny can continue to go as God directs." If you don't pony up for Benny Hinn's jet, "safety will plummet," Pastor Benny will be plumb tuckered out, and most importantly, untold numbers of precious souls who might have been saved will go to hell. All because of you. But if you do help pay for Benny Hinn's jet, he'll put your name in the special prayer cabin he's going to use as he races across the planet aboard, ahem, "Dove One," fulfilling the Great Commission from "the highest prayer tower in the world ... where he will intercede for you... ." And God will hear him better because he'll be 40,000 feet closer to heaven.

You think I'm making this up? Act quickly, for as Benny Hinn says in his appeal for the rest of the $6 million downpayment on the jet, "What we do for the sake of the Gospel, we must do now!"

(Hat tip: FrontBurner).