Free advice for the handyman

Yes, that is a great way not to get the job. It is also a great way not to get a punch in the nose from the paterfamilias. Great post, Rod.

I imagine the last thing the best thing about Rod wanted to hear was another recommedation on a book.

Too funny. This would make a great comedy if the misbehaving kid had kicked the hugging handyman in the shin(or somewhere else). At least he decided the kid needed a hug and not a spanking. People are bizarre.

Did the handyman recommend any blogs worth reading, like maybe his own? I wonder if this handyman's school has a reputation. A reader wrote me privately and identified the institution at which the man is studying.

Handymen typically have something the matter with them; if they didn't, they'd get a real job. That's going a bit too far, Susan. Rod clearly stated that the guy was a *student*. If he had anything "wrong" with him, it is that he is enrolled in an academic program whose demands on his time and energy preclude his getting a "real job" for the time being. I mean, come on. At the the guy is in school, which means that he might be able to get a "real job" eventually. I did odd jobs for a neighbor lady when I was 15? Was there something "wrong" with me? Other than the fact that I was 15 and in school, I mean? doesn't want to embarrass you by strongly disciplining her children in front of the stranger. I dunno, my mother had no qualms about "strongly disciplining" me in front of strangers. She figured (rightly) that the only one who would be really embarrassed was me, and that this might make me think twice in the future about acting up in front of strangers (which it did). But then, as my mother has frequently observed, she raised little kids in the good old days, when you could swat your children in public without having some self-appointed buttinsky shout "Child Abuse!" and bring the wrath of Children's Services swooping down on you. (I think one of the things that keeps me from wanted ever to have children is the fact that my mother constantly talks about how glad she is that she had children 40 years ago and not now.)

In my youth, I worked weekends for over a year selling to "handymen" what they needed to do their jobs. They were full of stories (usually told in neutral mode rather than complaining) about clients who 1) Knew more about the job than the handyman. 2) Knew more about how long the job should take than the handyman. 3) Knew nothing about how their own ignorance made the job take longer. These were the handymen who had already absorbed the fact that they could not actually say those things to the clients. Just sayin'... P.S. It having been a local hardware store, I often got to meet the clients who were the subjects of the stories, who thought they were going to save money by trying to do the work themselves. I honestly can't recall a story that wasn't completely corroborated by my experience of the subject.

Wow, more evidence that there is such a thing as "emotional intelligence." :P One thing that I have learned is that one should never do anything to anger a mom having a bad day. And there is nothing worse than telling them that they their children are brats. I am surprised that the lady didn't spank the clueless student.

Hey, hire my husband! He has got a large family to support and could use a little extra income. He also is very handy.
He would do very well supplementing his military retirement with some extra work like this. And believe me, he would never say anything negatively about your or Julie's parenting. He has his own hands too full of rowdy kids for that. ;-) And if we can make it on his retirement and other incomes that we have (or hope to soon have), he then would like to go to enroll in UTA to get a CE degree too.

Mary, there is a difference between what you describe -- which is intolerable, agreed -- and a perfect stranger taking it upon himself to tell the woman who is about to hire him that she either fails to spank her child enough, or fails to show him enough love. The kids were in the back of the yard yelling. They were being obnoxious, but they weren't interfering with his work. If he had been back there trying to work, and the kids were behaving brattily, he ought to have said something to his employer about it (in which case I guarantee you Julie would have died a thousand deaths of embarrassment over the boys' behavior, and come down on them like a ton of bricks). I couldn't agree more that too many parents today are absurdly permissive with their children, especially in terms of what they let them get away with in public. I would think the proper thing for you to do in situations like you describe is to tell the parent that you cannot work under those conditions, and that you will not carry on until she gets the misbehaving child under control. It would not be your place to advise the parent that she is failing to love or spank her child sufficiently.

Rod I'll agree the handyman offered more advice than was required. The upside is it's been my observation that children of Hispanics are the wildest in public places like grocery stores etc. But when interacting with those same parents the same wild childs are very respectful and attentive. I believe that's due to a culture that discourages disciplined behavior by children for the sake of disciplined behavior. They instead encourage disciplined behavior where it's important to have disciplined behavior. For me the interesting aspect of the best thing about you's adventure with someone handy is a person leaves the room with an imperial knowledge about everything. And is replaced by someone with an imperial knowledge about everything....... Oh, and the reason good handypersons are so hard to hire isn't because of their attitudes. It's the attitudes of those that require handypersons that make that field so unattractive. It's one of those careers where there just isn't enough money.........

Franklin Evans and Derek Copold's post about the know it all clients and the handymen with a bud or two in them are (at least in my experience) spot on. Years ago, my father worked as a handyman when his railroad union went out on strike. He talked about how the clients would hire him, then micromanage every aspect of the work when they had no more idea than I would of what needed done, or even better, use my dad as a "babysitter" to keep the kids entertained. ("Look, kids!! Go watch the handyman rewire the electrical box...") (BTW, my dad never showed up for a job with a Bud or two in him, but the handymen he hired later often did. The picture window that was handyman installed, then fell out two days later, and my dad's reaction to said situation is family legend... ;))