Vocational training

I'm proud of you for listening to your son. Last week also you had been vehement about that security system salesperson. It was understandable, but three times would not have been a charm.
I go often to Holy Trinity near your church. There was a man begging who was black, smelled to high heaven and unshaven, telling me he had AIDS. He approached me as I prayed alone in the church. Long story but I put him in my car and we drove to Walgreen s where I bought him disposable razors, tooth paste and other toiletries and then went to a bathroom in a gas station and he shaved, washed his face and brushed his teeth. I then returned him to the church where he might look more acceptable to those who might be better able to help him than me. And he had at least a piece of his pride back as he had been embarrassed by his unkempt face.
That's how I defined myself that day. He could have killed me. I would have preferred he not, but I was willing to risk it. It really doesn't matter how these people ended up where they are...drugs, bad luck, whatever. If there is ANYTHING I have learned in life after 50, those who believe "it" can only happen to 'them' are fooling themselves. Better to give than to deceive (ourselves).
Savor these years as your son is special and you and Julie are making the world a better place in the future when three children become caring knowlegable adults.

I live in a downtown area. It seems to me that the real problem with giving help on my own--ie. not through any institution--is that it breeds more and morre aggressive begging. It's a daily occurrence for people to harass and cuss at me because I won't give them money--right outside my own home. That said, I'm glad you were able to help some people out.

Clever boy, and very touching story. And i think his father might become a good priest too.

One has to wonder how some people can believe that we are inately evil after interacting with children. Lucas exhibited proof that we're born pure. I don't give to panhandlers. It's not because I'm mean spirited nor that I don't believe in the "that for the grace of God go I." I don't give to panhandlers because I see it as enabling them to remain panhandlers. The way I see it they've found the inconveniences and pain of begging preferable to the inconveniences and pain of becoming a productive unit in society. Charity should be about making people's lives better, not easier necessarily. Besides that, it's a lot more difficult to in your face turn them away than it is to give in and cough up some change. The last time I gave in happened down in Dallas at a weak moment. I was fueling up early in the morning when I was approached by a young man wanting fifty cents for the paper so he could look at the want ads for laborers. I gave him a dollar. I guess he decided we were friends and he asked me what I did for a living. I told him I was a weldor. "Man I couldn't do that. I tried it at a vocational school and all those sparks burned big time." Hmmmmmmm, my accepting those sparks as part and parcel of work enabled me to have that dollar for him, right?

Nashville has a huge homeless problem. In about half the city you can't walk three blocks without being accosted by a panhandler--especially if you're me. (They really do have a sixth sense for a pushover. I've been in a crowd of 10 or 15 people and had them walk straight up to me as though nobody else were in sight.) I always give to them when I can. I know that nine out of ten will spend it on booze or worse, but I figure "What if this guy is the tenth?" Yet I doubt I get any spiritual good out of it, since I often give with a sense of inner irritation, and "God loveth a cheerful giver." So I get the worst of both worlds, I guess.

It's one of those teachable moments. How to reinforce that compassion and muercy he feels and yet a tug at realism. A friend suggested years ago carrying bottled water and peanut butter crackers in teh car, so you have something to give besides money. I've gotten out of the habbit, but think I'll start doing that again.

According to the Orthodox fathers, original sin is not something we inherit. Yes, we inherit the consequences of Adam's fall, death and a weakened nature. But we do not inherit the guilt of Adam's sin. So, technically, little ones are innocent and pure. Even their temper tantrums are not sins, but rather signs that they are subject to weakness, pain, and death. We are not sinners until we are old enough (usually age 7-8) to know that something is a sin and freely choose to do it anyway. God bless.

I heard Douglas Gresham (C.S. Lewis's stepson) comment about a time he was walking with Tolkien and Lewis and they were approached by a beggar. Gresham recalls that Tolkien pulls out a handful of change from his pocket and gives it the man. Lewis chides Tolkien asking why he would give him the money when all he will spend it on is drink. Tolkien responded that that was all he was going to spend it on either.

Our priest calls beggars "Jesus in his disturbing disguise."
A few years ago, we picked up a homeless hitch hiker and had him live with us for a couple of months. It was the first time he'd been alcohol and drug free in more than two years. He found pick up work, got back in touch with his family, and started attending church with us. Eventually, he left again. While with us, he shared a lot about his experiences as a homeless person "flying a sign" and "spanging." Being homeless is a cold, hard life. Alcohol warms you up and knocks you out. It's its own kind of mercy, and possibly the only kind of mercy that speaks a homeless person's language. After our experience with him, we decided we'd always give when asked. It is more spiritually profitable for us to give than it is for us to try and judge whether a beggar is "worthy" or "properly needy."
Talk of "enabling" has no place in this discussion. What matters is that Jesus (albeit in one of his more disturbing disguises) asked.

John Stamps, I will pray for your son. And thanks to whoever contributed that Tolkein/Lewis story. Whether or not it was apocryphal, it hit me hard. I am the volunteer development coordinator for a rather well-run (next to no administrative costs; over 96% service-efficient) Northern Virginia area, ecumenical 'faith-based' organization. When I don't give that frozen chicken from my freezer to the food pantry clients, I ask the same questions you all ask when a panhandler begs from you. Tolkein had a good answer, for me.

Hi Susan and Dale, I wasn't looking for an Orthodox-RC imbroglio on original sin either.
Rather, just a simple observation -- before becoming a grandfather with my grandson, I would've sided with St Augustine by default.
The goodness of Little John Christian (or my own love for him) weirded me out at some deep inexplicable level.
But if I had a colicky grandson to babysit, no doubt my theological observations would have been quite different.
That's all! John

Kristen M., let me try to clarify what I mean when I talk about "enabling." It seems to me that the homeless person is better off if he goes to one of the several shelters that are within a couple of miles, rather than staying on the street, because of both the rules that the shelters have and the help they provide. When I give food or money to a beggar, do I make it easier for the beggar to avoid making the better choice to go to one of the shelters? (And yes, I do give money to one of the shelters.) Maybe the answer is always to give, and not worry about whether the giving helps or hurts the recipient. But it doesn't seem morally obvious to me that that is the right answer. What am I missing?

John Stamps: Oh, don't sweat it--it wasn't you I was responding to. God bless you and yours.

Maybe the answer is always to give, and not worry about whether the giving helps or hurts the recipient. But it doesn't seem morally obvious to me that that is the right answer. What am I missing? You're not missing anything. This is a very tough question. Do we give something to someone which is in fact bad for him just so that we feel good or gain some kind of spiritual merit? How meritorious is that kind of behavior, really?
What the whole discussion is missing, however, is the fact that some huge proportion of our homeless population is mentally ill. Faced with that reality, discussions about "enabling" fall short. What is needed is not "enabling" or refusal to "enable," what is needed is access to treatment. I know from personal experience that for a homeless man to get access to mental health treatment, counseling, psychiatric drugs, he has to be mentally well (and being a lawyer wouldn't hurt!). The forms and procedures are so complex that they immediately weed out the sickest applicants (whom no one wants to deal with anyway). I don't give to beggars. Period. Because what you subsidize you get more of, and I don't want more disorganized, disoriented people importuning me or anyone else on the streets. I do give to shelters and mental health services.

Enjoyed the blog. Two things that tickled me. First, the idea that priests "don't need to tee tee". Tell my bladder that when I am entirely vested, ready for the service, and suddenly... Also, that at his tender age, he already understands the concept of the priesthood of ALL believers. Thanks for sharing.

"I can POW! bishop them right in the head." Have you been reading him Belloc's "Pelagian Drinking Song" by any chance? ;)

Rod,
This is one of my favorite posts. Being a mother of two little boys has made me appreciative of a child's perspective. My 4 year old finds coins on the floor of our home band immediately wants to drive to church so we can drop them in the poor box. We had to institute a second piggy bank just for "the poor" and every now and then he shares from his main piggy bank to put in the poor bank.
Perhaps the term "bishop" refers to extreme cases like Hitler and Stalin. Not like Lucas knows about those bad guys yet. He may know on an instinctual level that there are people who are just that bad? LOL. Just a thought.

"I want to be a bishop. Because if the bad guys come around, I can POW! bishop them right in the head." Like Alan above, I loved this line. A true classic for the ages! Matthew 5:42: "Give to everyone who begs from you, and do not refuse anyone who wants to borrow from you." As others have pointed out, this is a tough one, for sure, for sure. Kristen makes a valid point about seeing beggars as prophets, and Susan prefers to address the problem at its source (by contributing to shelters and mental health services, also a very valid approach). I find myself unable to find a good, consistent answer to the problem of how to fulfill my Christian duty to the poor. Maybe there isn't only one answer, except to be generous with those who help the poor for a living, and to listen to God when confronted with a specific situation. If He's tied up with something else, check with Lucas Dreher.

This is a seriously tough question -- whether or not to give money to panhandlers -- who are not the same as "beggars". (My distinction is that a beggar truly needs help; a panhandler likely is just a "pro" at wheedling funds.) Although I personally incline toward those who don't like to hand over money to a red-faced, blood-shot-eyed person already holding a brown-bagged bottle . . . At the same time, I agree that it is not my place to judge, ahead of time, the heart and plans of another person.
My preferred action, then, is when somebody tells me that he is hungry, I hand him food. Sometimes I receive an astonished stare, as if the fresh loaf of bread (or whatever was in the grocery sack nearest me) is the LAST thing he wants.