The Silda saga, cont'd

Actually, I'm rather hoping that the US Attorney will threaten to indict her for something, just on general principals.

I can't directly relate. I've never cheated on, nor been cheated on, and been maried more than a couple decades.

But I did have the experience of watching a friend, co-worker (now business partner) go through the experience of having his wife cheat on him. Not just cheat on him, but leave, move in with some other guy, even serial cheating with multiple people.

And then sue him, and attempt to defame him in court, etc.

She destroyed her relationships with her children, a marriage, a lot of friendships, and so on.

The one thing I remember... Was the expression on his face, reflected in his voice, when he was responding to what, if anything, he really needed... It was this: What do I tell the kids?

one in early grade school, one in upper. And she used and misused them as pawns to be nasty and spiteful.

"What do I tell the kids?"

I had no answer. He had no answer. None of us did. Nobody did.

That question still haunts me. Even though I know them well now, and see them regularly, I cannot help but remember, and I see how that experience changed them.

"What do I tell the kids?"

Maybe all those instructions and expectations from God of married people were wise after all.

IOW, what happened between Spitzer and the prostitute is the business of the people of New York State.

What happens between Spitzer and his wife is NO ONE'S business save the family. For outsiders to discuss it is a sin.

When did any of this become our family tragedy? Shouldn't we be part of the good guys, keeping the gossip down for the sake of the daughters (at least)!

The whole world is not our business. We don't have to all stoop to the morality of the reality shows.

This is what, the fourth column you've done on Spitzer. I'm waiting for you to do such a long column on Mrs Haggard, Mrs Swaggart, Mrs Gingrich #1 and #2, Mrs Hyde, Mrs Vitter, Mrs Craig, Mrs Cunningham, Mrs McCain #1, and Mrs Giuilianis #1 and #2

Winston Smith

May God have mercy on Silda Spitzer and her children, relieve their discomfort and ease their sorrow. May God have mercy on her husband, and show him the path to repentance and reconciliation with his family, with himself and with God. And may God have mercy on me, a sinner, for paying too much attention to the faults and sins of others and not my own.

It's nobody's business but theirs how they handle this situation within the family.

Amen

Truly, I believe in my cinical way, that Spitzer was asked to resign for the "good of the Party" and that is the only reason he did. Silda, if I have heard correctly, wanted him to stay. I also believe that some of the people who would be involved on prosecuting him are also on a client list somewhere. Furthurmore, I believe all parties involved in any rumoured investigation know this about each other and everything is handled on a "wink,wink. nudge,nudge." basis, until there is a politcal reason for "outing" any involved party.

Spitzer made a great many enemies. They wanted him out of the way, now he is. He will suffer no further consequences for his actions. He will be fine, and he deserves no pity. As far as arrogance goes, the people of New York knew this about him when he was elected, and I think his wife guessed it before she married him. No one in their heart of hearts is really surprised. The general vibe that I'm getting hearing on the N.Y. news shows is that polititians on both sides of the aisle feel a great deal of relief with Patterson coming in because, even though he is much farther to the left of Spitzer,in his veiws (i.e. police officers should face charges if they injure or kill a criminal while trying to arrest them- I'm not sure if that was the proposition
exactly, maybe someone else could explain it better.) he has a willingness to listen to ideas other than his own, works well with others and has a sense of humour. All attributes that Eliot seemed to lack.

Anyway, what I'm thinking, DavidTC, is that alot of noise will be made about charges and all for awhile, but the Federal government will not bother with this for long, neither will any one else.

Without any intent to second guess, those who assert that they were better or worse off after their parents divorced need to take a close look at that assertion: how do you know that? You didn't grow up in the other situation, and you simply have no way to determine what else might have happened if the divorce had not happened.

I was 13 when my parents divorced. I went through 2 years of being manipulated, scorned and scapegoated by my father during "visitation rights" outings with my father and younger siblings. OTOH, my mother never dated after the divorce, let alone remarried, and I clearly remember being jealous of my friends with fathers at home. I spent many adult years second-guessing my mother and myself to no good and significant bad results.

All I'm saying is that the main question should be: am I okay now? If not, what am I doing to get better? Certainly, the past has important input into both questions. But I personally see no benefit to "what if" thinking.

This woman reveals what I have already seen with regard to Ms. Spitzer, people blaming the victim, in part because they don't want to believe the truth about the person who caused the problem to start with. On a discussion board I have been on for several days someone accused Ms. Spitzer of being a wh... because she advised her husband initially not to resign. The person was "assuming" that she did not want to lose her position as First Lady of NY. It is amazing to me how consistant this 'blame the victim' reaction is in any case that is even remotely sexual in character. The idea that the 'wife drove her husband to a prostitute' because she was not fulfilling her 'wifely duty' is preposterous. This sort of thing happens regardless of the man's relationship with his wife. But standing next to him at his moment of revelation has the effect of branding her as a failed wife.