Yes, Dear Leader, we can!

You can't blame Barack Obama for these creepily worshipful viral video ads will.i.am is doing for him, but they are so dead earnest that they're just begging to be mocked -- and Obama along with it. This is not a political campaign, this is a cult of personality. I can't believe that I'm saying this, but more of this gaggy Dear Leader stuff from Obama worshipers I have to watch, the more I appreciate Hillary Clinton's plain old milk-curdling nastiness. Watch for yourself (but be warned: the chant gets stuck in your head, like a fresh dog turd in the grooves of your sandals).

Let's not forget Madame Obama's Stakhanovite exhortation:

Barack Obama will require you to work. He is going to demand that you shed your cynicism. That you put down your divisions. That you come out of your isolation, that you move out of your comfort zones. That you push yourselves to be better. And that you engage. Barack will never allow you to go back to your lives as usual, uninvolved, uninformed.

Where the hell is SPY magazine when America needs it?

(P.S. Note to Ryan Philippe: you look swell in that clip, and I've got no problem with you voting for Obama, but if you really want to make a better world for your children, why don't you go back to those children, and the wife you left to take up with your co-star?)

(P.P.S. Note to Jim Findley: Ha! Finally, 23 years after that Russian History class, I was able to reference Stakhanov in the course of my labors. Stoli shots all around!)