I am going to tell you what a fool I was, in hope that you will learn from my foolishness, and not do what I did. Or rather, what I failed to do.
I opened up the New York Times the other day to see that General Robert H. Barrow had died. He was 86, and formerly the commandant of the US Marine Corps. He's from my hometown, and returned there to the family plantation after his retirement. I knew that he was there, and for a long, long time, would pass his house when I'd go home to visit my folks and think, "One of these times, I need to call on Gen. Barrow. I bet he's interesting."
I never did. Here, from the Times obit, is the kind of man I never found the time to call on:
General Barrow combined Southern courtliness, fierce devotion to Marine tradition and courage reflected in dozens of awards. He was awarded the Navy Cross in Korea and the Army Distinguished Service Cross in Vietnam, both of which are second only to the Medal of Honor.As the Marine manpower chief in 1976, General Barrow was instrumental in drafting reforms designed to end physical abuse and harassment of recruit trainees by drill instructors. The New York Times, quoting military officials, reported in 1979 that the training reforms, which included closer supervision by officers, had worked well.
At the time, the general said the corps would not ease the tough physical conditioning that was a hallmark of Marine boot camps. But he demanded that there be no more "excess stress" on recruits, including "nose-to-nose yelling" by drill sergeants.
General Barrow also succeeded in raising the quality of recruits, in part by seeking out high school graduates. In 1975, less than half had high school diplomas; by 1982, 82 percent did.
Robert Hilliard Barrow was born on Feb. 5, 1922, in Baton Rouge, La., and grew up on his family's Rosale Plantation in West Feliciana Parish, La. The family's circumstances were difficult, however. They had no electricity, so Robert satisfied his early passion for reading by using a kerosene lamp.
More:
He stayed on as a drill instructor, then went on to officer candidate school and was commissioned as a second lieutenant in May 1943. He ended up being deployed to China, where he led an American team fighting with a Chinese guerrilla force behind Japanese lines. He was awarded a Bronze Star with Combat "V."During the Korean War, he fulfilled diverse assignments, including the Inchon-Seoul operation, a daring amphibious strike led by Gen. Douglas MacArthur, and the Chosin Reservoir campaign, in which American troops fought valiantly to hold off invading Chinese before being forced to withdraw. Lynn Montross the corps' chief historian at the time, called him "the most outstanding company commander of the war."
In 1952, General Barrow was lent by the Marine Corps to a top-secret mission on a string of islands north of Taiwan, the Marine Corps said in its announcement of his death.
During Vietnam, General Barrow commanded the Ninth Marine Regiment, Third Marine Division. In Operation Dewey Canyon in early 1969, his troops killed 1,617 enemy soldiers and captured 1,461 weapons and hundreds of tons of ammunition. Gen. Richard G. Stillwell, chief of staff to Gen. William C. Westmoreland, the American commander in Vietnam, called General Barrow the war's "finest regimental commander."
They buried Gen. Barrow in St. Francisville today. I talked to my sister Ruthie, who took her class to watch the funeral procession. They had a full Marine honor guard, and the current USMC Commandant was present to pay his respects. The honor guard accompanied Gen. Barrow's casket through town, the Marine Corps band played, they had a 21-gun salute, and it was all so glorious in my sister's telling. Nothing like that has ever happened in our town. A truly great man lived among us.
And see, I knew he was there all along, and never made time to go see him, and ask him about his life and times. What stories he could have told! If only I'd had enough sense to stop by and say hello. I come from a small town. People are neighborly. I bet he would have been pleased to make time for a curious visitor who wanted to find out what he knew about the world. But I never made time for him.
What I want to tell you is this: you can probably think of an old man or old woman in the periphery of your life, someone who may or may not be as illustrious or as accomplished as Gen. Barrow was, but who still has quite a story to tell. You may have thought to yourself that someday, you'd like to sit down with that person and have a long talk. But everydayness sets in, and you never do get around to it. Suddenly, you're out of days. The moment has passed. There's nothing left but regret.
I was a fool to let the opportunity to benefit from Gen. Barrow's wisdom pass me by. Whoever your Gen. Barrow is, don't you be a fool too.
Add to Del.icio.us
Add to Technorati
Add to Digg
Add to Newsvine
Add to Facebook
Add to StumbleUpon
Subscribe
The Shot of Whiskey I Never Drank
Trent Gilliss, Online Editor
Studs Terkel, the legendary radio personality and interviewer, died today. Nearly four years ago, I took my first production trip for SOF — and what a way to start things out — with an interview in his Chicago home. At the time (he was 92 then), he had taken a fall and thus was primarily confined to his bed, relocated to the first floor in the center of his living room.
We were prepared for an elderly man who may not have a lot of energy to make it through an hour. What we got was the same old dynamo that I’d seen and heard so many times. He was alive, and his vivacity energized all of us. I regret having to relinquish this original character.
During that hour, I remember three things vividly: his definition of being an agnostic, which he defined as “a cowardly atheist”; the way he spoke about his wife as a living presence in his life, even though she had passed away some time before; this towering figure shook hands with me and asked me to repeat my name several times so that he could register it and acknowledge my presence. For part of a crew (and a Web lackey at that) invading his home, this made me feel welcome — and special; and, I write this with a regret that pangs my heart, I didn’t take him up on his offer to have a snort of whiskey before the interview — even if it was before noon.
Oh how I wish I would’ve raised my one glass to him. I’ll raise it tonight instead.
Trent Gillis, online editor for Speaking of Faith, shares a similar sentiment on the passing of Studs Terkel...
The post is worth a read. In it, he says "I write this with a regret that pangs my heart, I didn’t take him up on his offer to have a snort of whiskey before the interview — even if it was before noon. Oh how I wish I would’ve raised my one glass to him. I’ll raise it tonight instead"
Trent Gillis, online editor for Speaking of Faith, shares a similar sentiment on the passing of Studs Terkel...
The post is worth a read. In it, he says "I write this with a regret that pangs my heart, I didn’t take him up on his offer to have a snort of whiskey before the interview — even if it was before noon. Oh how I wish I would’ve raised my one glass to him. I’ll raise it tonight instead"
Rod ... I'm Gen.Barrow's son. Your reflection on not visiting is an appropriate message and lesson for others, but don't think you would have learned about medals or conflict. Dad had more humility than any man I have ever known. He spoke of his own career activity only for official records, records needed by the USMC. Most of Dad's legend was gained by talking with those who served with him, those who benefited from his policies, those who's lives were saved. Dad spoke more often of his boyhood, his values and his faith ... He would have welcomed your visit, but you would have quickly found yourself talking about yourself. He had a knack of turning the conversation quickly away from himself. God bless you. God blessed Dad long ago and often. God blessed me with having him as a Dad.
And, God blessed our nation with General Barrow.
Post a Comment
By submitting these comments, I agree to the beliefnet.com terms of service, rules of conduct and privacy policy (the "agreements"). I understand and agree that any content I post is licensed to beliefnet.com and may be used by beliefnet.com in accordance with the agreements.