A delicious e-mail from an Austin friend:
Oh, this is just so wonderfully stink-stank-stunk craplicious! Makeshift memorials, middle-aged moonwalkers, breathless Larry King interviews with Cher and Celine Dion (barf!), Geraldo parading his man-crush (eyeew!), Elizabeth Taylor (isn't she dead yet?), Liza Minnelli (ditto), Al Sharpton, Oprah, Dr. Phil - crap, crap, oh, glorious oozing B-list media crap!!!!!! I simply cannot wait for the funeral - Elton John is reworking the words to "Candle in the Wind" as we speak (although how he's going to fit in Bubbles the chimp and the bones of the Elephant Man remains to be seen)! And somewhere in South Carolina, Mark Sanford is busily thanking God!
And Mahmoud Ahmadinejad is doing likewise to Allah.
C., you pusher you, you're making me want to turn cable TV on to join in the hathos-fest! I saw Charlie Gibson on GMA this morning saying that "everybody" has Michael Jackson on their iPod, and "if you don't, you're a ..." -- and he trailed off. Well, I'm a ... myself, as I do not own now nor have ever owned a Michael Jackson album. Not much of a connoisseur of his music. But I am a connoisseur of bathetic celebrity trash culture, so perhaps I'll check in on Larry King before turning in tonight.
UPDATE: It shouldn't be necessary to point this out, but given the hyperventilating by a couple of readers in the combox thread, here goes: This letter makes fun not of Michael Jackson, but of the insane media and popular-culture reaction to his death. Get a grip, people.
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I didn't see anyone making fun of MJ here. The comments refer to the silliness of the media.
It is ironic, however, that just a few short years ago the man was reviled.
Now upon his death his music has been blaring all over my neighborhood.
One day a has been, the next day dead and his star reborn. Odd this place called America, and strangely forgiving.
His children? Have you seen "his" children? They're no more genetically connected to him than Bubbles his chimp.
And one hates to break the news to you so "hatefully", but he's dead. Trust me, despite his terrific impersonation of a zombie 24 years ago, he can't come back and will never, ever cry over what anybody writes about him.
Naturally the "Reverend" Al ("Tawana was telling the truth")Sharpton had to get his own self in front of a microphone. Just for the 'class' of having a 'clergyman' around.
Conservatives: so unfunny, that when one claims his friend's painfully unfunny email is "delicious" it's almost funny. Almost.
Charles Cosomo: I'm glad you believe you're so civilized. Disdain for pop music is really revolutionary and really spot on.
And people wonder why everyone hates you guys....
Hosono,
Everybody does "hate" Cosimano -- except for Jesus, of course.
But Cosimano is not conservative.
Rather he's a left-liberal-libertarian.
So love him or hate him, he pitches and/or catches for *your* team, not Rod's -- as regular readers all know.
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