Crunchy Con

But will Elton John serenade him off?

Monday July 6, 2009

Time to get your Charles Cosimano on, as America's celebrity-industrial complex goes into Defcon 5 in advance of tomorrow's apotheosis of Michael Jackson: Downtown hotels were quickly filling. Police, trying to avoid a mob scene, warned those without tickets to...
Advertisement
Comments
Ralph Wiggum
July 6, 2009 11:45 PM

I wonder if Michael Jackson was the anti-christ.

Charles Cosimano
July 7, 2009 12:13 AM

I'm blushing from the compliment!

So how will I celebrate the decent into hell of Michael Jackson? By ignoring it of course. I have over 1000 videos in this office alone to choose from and none of them have Michael Jackson anywhere near them.

Now if only Poseidon would bless Los Angeles with an earthquake during the-er-celebration...

That's it! I'll watch Atlantis--The Lost Continent from 1961 and think of Los Angeles when it blows up.

Lord Karth
July 7, 2009 12:18 AM

Now this is what I call "a target-rich environment" in the making....

Just think of what a magnificent opportunity we have to improve the Human breed here.....so much Human debris, IN ONE PLACE ! And so little time. Where's that giant broom when we need it ?

Your servant,

Lord Karth

Lord Karth
July 7, 2009 12:20 AM

Actually, never mind a giant broom. Anyone know of a neutron bomb that nobody's using tomorrow ?

Your servant,

Lord Karth

Charles Cosimano
July 7, 2009 1:12 AM

Nuke hell! I'd be happy if Uncle Osama had a spare 747 laying around.

Damned terrorists are never around when you need them.

(Steve! We're just kidding!)

AML
July 7, 2009 2:34 AM

On the 4th of July, in our large group, aged 13 to 84, not one person admitted to being a fan. Almost everyone except the youngest thought of Jackson only as a freakish child-abuser.

Bread and circuses for the masses. And the vote. OMG

Justice
July 7, 2009 2:51 AM

MJ memorial tickets may be hard to get, but Rod Dreher's Hatefest '09 is a rockin' option. IF there's a hell, I'm quite sure there's plenty of room for pseudo Christian bloggers who get their orgasms from stone-throwing and grave-dancing. And sadly, with all the horrid comments above, the only one that will be viewed as wrong is the one that gently points out that you and your "followers" are obviously of the "challenged" persuasion. Just sayin'.

Jude
July 7, 2009 3:07 AM

Justice,

You must have been one of those people who clamored for Obama to throw Clark under the bus for "attacking McCain's war record" when Clark merely said that fighting in 'Nam doesn't automatically qualify one for the Presidency.

Only Charles is grave-dancing here. The rest of us are making fun of those participating in the self-indulgent, codependent public freak show portion of the media circus that will surround the funeral of a highly talented, and equally highly tragic, celebrity.

John E. - Agn Stoic
July 7, 2009 7:16 AM

I've tried to ignore the Jackson funeral-fest, but I inadvertently saw a local news report featuring a local woman who was flying out to LA with the hope of finding a ticket to the festival.

She was doing it because she "needed closure" over the death of this person she did not know.

Chris S
July 7, 2009 8:15 AM

I can already hear Elton singing "Goodbye Billy Jean"

Travis Mamone
July 7, 2009 8:19 AM
http://tmamone.blogspot.com

America's Princess Diana? Hmm, let's see: on one hand, we have elegant beauty and humanitarianism. On the other hand, we have super-talent overshadowed by bizarre behavior and allegations of child molestation. I, personally, don't see the connection.

John
July 7, 2009 8:55 AM

Jackson's fanbase isn't the most self-controlled bunch, so I'm guessing there could well be a riot today.

Camp Topisaw
July 7, 2009 9:01 AM

Rod Dreher's Hatefest '09 - Love it! I'm off to the T-shirt shop with a tentative design already. Let you know when they're ready.

vessel
July 7, 2009 9:10 AM

Ha. Dreher, I swore off political-ish blogs in the aftermath of last year's election, but I had to stop by to get your take on the whole Palin quit-a-thon. Holy wow, I forgot how much I loved your writing! This post is a perfect encapsulation of my feelings on the matter. We couldn't be more different on some cultural, religious, and political points, but I really appreciate your perspective and clarity. Blessings.

Your Name
July 7, 2009 9:30 AM

IF there's a hell, I'm quite sure there's plenty of room for pseudo Christian bloggers who get their orgasms from stone-throwing and grave-dancing.

There's a reason that Inferno is the best and most popular bit of The Divine Comedy. We may not be familiar with the players that Dante was skewering any more, but we recognize the type.

freelunch
July 7, 2009 9:34 AM

[also 9:30 am]

Travis,

I thought that Princess Diana was America's every bit as much as the UK's. For people who are pleased to have no kings, we certainly seem quite happy to have wall-to-wall coverage entertaining us about the UK's royal family.

Zoey
July 7, 2009 9:41 AM

Tickets to the funeral? Booked flights and hotel rooms? Wasn't Michael Jackson's concert sold-out or near sold-out before he died? Aren't we supposed to be in a recession-on-its-way-to-a-depression? Where are people getting the money to do this stuff? Where does the urge to spend money on this kind of thing coming from when people all over the country can't pay their bills?

rr
July 7, 2009 10:25 AM

It is true that Michael Jackson was a talented entertainer who sold millions of records. I'm not a fan in the least, but I realize he was an important figure in American popular culture. That being said, he was long past his heyday (the 1970s and 1980s). Moreover, he was a very strange and troubled individual and quite possibly was a child molester.

I'm not surprised that his death was a big story. But the media has gone way, way overboard in covering it. This is a prime example of how the media is too obsessed with trivial things such as celebrities. My wife and I generally like to have the news on in the background when we get ready for work in the mornings. We don't see shows such as "The Today Show" as especially deep. But it's nice to hear some of what is going on in the world and the weather. We haven't been able to watch much of the news in the morning this past week or so because of all the Michael Jackson coverage. It really took the cake for us one day last week when they spent all of thirty seconds discussing North Korea launching new missiles and 4,000 US marines (who have family back home for crying out loud) launching a new attack in Afghanistan and the rest of the time on Michael Jackson. It just shows how shallow the media is to obsess over trivial things and celebrities instead of real stories.

Seriously, some perspective is needed here. And all the people who are obsessed with the Michael Jackson, and especially the media and fellow celebrities, are just begging to be mocked. In this case, let the Charles Cosimanos of the world have their fun.

rr

Observer
July 7, 2009 10:26 AM

Tickets to the funeral? Booked flights and hotel rooms? Wasn't Michael Jackson's concert sold-out or near sold-out before he died? Aren't we supposed to be in a recession-on-its-way-to-a-depression?

Economic suffering does seem to be unevenly distributed, doesn't it. I took my son to the Apple store to get an iPod, and there was a line all the way down the block of people who were waiting to buy the new iPhone, a $300 toy of no great use or reliability. (Is it, as a salesperson assured me, "really" a computer? Is it a game machine? What it is NOT is a reliable cell phone.)

Flying all the way from England to go to Michael Jackson's funeral? I'm not surprised in the slightest. People in the generation we're talking about hop on transcontinental flights at the drop of a hat, and think nothing of it.

There does seem to be a great deal more loose money around than we have previously been assured.

Salamander
July 7, 2009 11:40 AM

Where are they finding all of these fans? I don't know anyone who liked him. I was a teenager back in the early '80s, and even then I never could figure out who was buying all his records. I don't think I even knew ANYONE who owned "Thriller," and this was back when we were all obsessed with our record collections. He was a creepy weird guy with a strange falsetto voice back then, and he got even creepier and weirder as time went on. Why is everyone making such a big deal out of this?

Observer
July 7, 2009 11:59 AM

It really took the cake for us one day last week when they spent all of thirty seconds discussing North Korea launching new missiles and 4,000 US marines (who have family back home for crying out loud) launching a new attack in Afghanistan and the rest of the time on Michael Jackson. It just shows how shallow the media is to obsess over trivial things and celebrities instead of real stories.

Easy story, is why or part of why. They can just pull it off the wire services, get a talking head or two in there, and run some old concert footage and voila! a twenty-minute TV segment. The North Korea missile story (complete with the rather complex reaction of Russia and China, not to mention our own mixed feelings, the new attack in Afghanistan - those would require some actual thought and maybe even god forbid research.

Also the perception is that more people care about Michael Jackson's funeral than about any of this substantive news. I haven't taken any surveys, but I can tell you that this media circus bores me witless.

Anglican
July 7, 2009 12:17 PM

All I can say is yeah Michael Jackson had some talent,but by the end he was degenerate used up freak, and his greiving fans converging on L.A. are a herd embarrassing mentally deranged cattle, who should all be sent to some Soviet style uranium mines circa 1950s Siberia or used as human mine sweepers in the event of war with North Korea.

Frank
July 7, 2009 12:22 PM

Maybe they'll set Elizabeth Taylor on fire, or something.

Christians aren't perfect, just forgiven!

Lord Karth
July 7, 2009 12:30 PM

And just remember this, people:

If Michael Jackson isn't buried, properly, in the full light of publicity, and with full fanfare, the terrorists win.

Your servant,

Lord Karth

Your Name
July 7, 2009 1:30 PM

If only they would bury all known and existing audio and video recordings of him with his body.

THAT is the kind of "closure" I would be happy with.

Rod Dreher
July 7, 2009 1:53 PM

I just heard Queen Latifah read a perfectly horrible poem Maya Angelou typed for the occasion. It is pure uncut celebrity hathos, all of it. Joy! It's like being in my own personal Prytania.

Your Name
July 7, 2009 2:08 PM

You know, I just can't figure out why people say conservatives are douche bags.

Lord Karth
July 7, 2009 2:09 PM

Mr. Dreher:

I take it that "Prytania" is the Cajun-dialect translation of "Purgatory" ?

Your servant,

Lord Karth

Cecelia
July 7, 2009 2:12 PM

well at least we aren't having gladiators killing each other in the coliseum to divert the masses from reality - but wait - the Staples Center is sort of like the coliseum! Well - at least we aren't having the lions eat the Christians.

Alicia
July 7, 2009 2:24 PM

Actually, Elizabeth Taylor decided to stay home and mourn in private, according to at least one news story I heard.

It's easy to see why Taylor, Jackson, Brando, etc. were such good friends, since they were all so damaged by their celebrity that it was as much a curse as it was a blessing.

As over-the-top and "all about us" as this pop culture coming together around Jackson's death is, I do have a certain feeling of sympathy for these celebrity basket-cases. Yes, the "all Michael Jackson all the time" grief-fest is unseemly. But, that doesn't take away from the fact of troubled and gifted life, and tragic death.

Cultural conservative?
July 7, 2009 2:36 PM

For goodness' sake, people, Rod is not spitting on MJ's grave here. He is sending up the absurd circus of schmaltz around his funeral.

Please just unclench for a few minutes. Life can be pretty tough and tragic. Sometimes humour, even (horror of horrors) non-PC humour, is all we have.

Your Name
July 7, 2009 2:41 PM

"Rod Dreher's Hatefest '09 is a rockin' option"

Interesting that the reputation of a 'Christian' blogger is one of a hate-monger.

I 'wonder' how that happened - NOT!

Your Name
July 7, 2009 2:45 PM

Rod Dreher's Hatefest '09 is a rockin' option

So true. So evident, too.

Cultural conservative?
July 7, 2009 2:46 PM

Wow, Rod, you certainly get some self-righteous humourless crybabies on here. It's like being at a support group for Prissy Lefties Who Find It Hard To Cope With All The Other People (Especially Conservatives) Who Are Nowhere Near As Good As Them.

N.A.O.
July 7, 2009 2:50 PM

Really, Rod, let the dead bury their dead ;-)

Anne
July 7, 2009 4:44 PM

Posting from my useless new iPhone to wonder if anyone has created an MJ Keyboard Cat video yet? There's already one for Palin, must go check You Tube!

Anne
July 7, 2009 4:50 PM

Play him off, Keyboard Cat:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mpnMCLvdtvg

(not putting in a link, CAPTCHA will eat it!)

Old Violet Eyes
July 7, 2009 4:55 PM

"Rod Dreher's Hatefest '09 is a rockin' option"

A person who claims not to have any vices is bound to develop some pretty obnoxious virtues.

-Elizabeth Taylor

phreeque show
July 7, 2009 6:33 PM

Get the YouTube video of Triumph, the Insult Comic Dog reporting from Michael Jackson's trial and you will know all ye need to know about the pointy nosed one and his fans.

phreeque show
July 7, 2009 6:37 PM

The British Airway's guy was right-this IS like Di's death, only with more people shouting "Testify!" in the audience.

Charles Curtis
July 8, 2009 9:48 AM

Come on. Rod's not being hateful, just snarky.


And I have to say the thought of of them lighting up old Liz is pretty funny. Not sayin' I want to see them do it.. But still.

One of the French girls in the community I live in (all Swiss, Chinese, French) told me that Micheal is going to be buried in a gold sarcophagus.. Poor guy. I mean, it's either snark, or depression. Sometimes you gotta go snarky, in psychological self defense..

So glad I'm in Switzerland, and nowhere near a t.v.. If it weren't for Rod, I'd have little idea of any of this..

Post a Comment

By submitting these comments, I agree to the beliefnet.com terms of service, rules of conduct and privacy policy (the "agreements"). I understand and agree that any content I post is licensed to beliefnet.com and may be used by beliefnet.com in accordance with the agreements.



Please type the text you see in the box below to verify your post and help us prevent spam. You have a limited time to type - you may wish to compose your comment in a separate document and paste it here upon completion.

Type the characters you see in the picture above.

Advertisement

Search This Blog

About Crunchy Con

Rod Dreher is an editorial columnist for the Dallas Morning News, and author of "Crunchy Cons" (Crown Forum), a nonfiction book about conservatives, most of them religious, whose faith and political convictions sometimes put them at odds with mainstream conservatives. The views expressed in this blog are his own.

feed icon Subscribe

RSS Feed

Receive updates from Crunchy Con

Advertisement

Advertisement


About Beliefnet

Our mission is to help people like you find, and walk, a spiritual path that will bring comfort, hope, clarity, strength, and happiness. More about Beliefnet.

Legal

Copyright © Beliefnet, Inc. and/or its licensors. All rights reserved. Use of this site is subject to Terms of Service and to our Privacy Policy. Constructed by Beliefnet.

Advertisement

Report as Inappropriate

You are reporting this content because it violates the Terms of Service.

All reported content is logged for investigation.