That’s how one author is describing the pick-and-choose, “have-it-your-way” spiritual life that is becoming increasingly popular — and it’s sparked some lively debate:
“I’m spiritual but not religious.”It’s a trendy phrase people often use to describe their belief that they don’t need organized religion to live a life of faith.
But for Jesuit priest James Martin, the phrase also hints at something else: egotism.
“Being spiritual but not religious can lead to complacency and self-centeredness,” says Martin, an editor at America, a national Catholic magazine based in New York City. “If it’s just you and God in your room, and a religious community makes no demands on you, why help the poor?”
Religious debates erupt over everything from doctrine to fashion. Martin has jumped into a running debate over the “I’m spiritual but not religious” phrase.
The “I’m spiritual but not religious” community is growing so much that one pastor compared it to a movement. In a 2009 survey by the research firm LifeWay Christian Resources, 72 percent of millennials (18- to 29-year-olds) said they’re “more spiritual than religious.” The phrase is now so commonplace that it’s spawned its own acronym (“I’m SBNR”) and Facebook page: SBNR.org.
But what exactly does being “spiritual but not religious” mean, and could there be hidden dangers in living such a life?
Heather Cariou, a New York City-based author who calls herself spiritual instead of religious, doesn’t think so. She’s adopted a spirituality that blends Buddhism, Judaism and other beliefs.
“I don’t need to define myself to any community by putting myself in a box labeled Baptist, or Catholic, or Muslim,” she says. “When I die, I believe all my accounting will be done to God, and that when I enter the eternal realm, I will not walk though a door with a label on it.”
BJ Gallagher, a Huffington Post blogger who writes about spirituality, says she’s SBNR because organized religion inevitably degenerates into tussles over power, ego and money.
Gallagher tells a parable to illustrate her point:
“God and the devil were walking down a path one day when God spotted something sparkling by the side of the path. He picked it up and held it in the palm of his hand.
“Ah, Truth,” he said.
“Here, give it to me,” the devil said. “I’ll organize it.”
Gallagher says there’s nothing wrong with people blending insights from different faith traditions to create what she calls a “Burger King Spirituality — have it your way.”
She disputes the notion that spiritual people shun being accountable to a community.
“Twelve-step people have a brilliant spiritual community that avoids all the pitfalls of organized religion,” says Gallagher, author of “The Best Way Out is Always Through.”
“Each recovering addict has a ‘god of our own understanding,’ and there are no priests or intermediaries between you and your god. It’s a spiritual community that works.”
There’s much more to chew on this “Burger King spirituality” at the link.
posted June 5, 2010 at 9:54 am
There’s a fine line between striving to be a better person and acknowledging that God requires much of us which is not on the ‘fun extras’ side of the menu.
At the same time, when I look at the passion and money which the organized Christian churches in America spend on seeking out the mote in The Other’s eye so as not to cope with the beam in their own, I can understand the appeal.
This is as much a result of the culture wars as anything else – a thirty year old mother of two might see value in preserving God’s beautiful natural world. She might be furious about the Gulf of Mexico.
When her passion for good stewardship is met by a church which tells her she can be angry about GAGA* issues alone, otherwise she’s not a good Christian, I suspect her commitment to that church might begin to waiver.
*GAGA: Guns, Amerika, Teh Gayz, Abortion
posted June 5, 2010 at 10:18 am
Today, Saturday June 5, is the feast day of St. Boniface — missionary/bishop/martyr to the Germans. The first reading was taken from the Letter to Timothy, where Paul gives his mentee instructions on how to persevere as an evangelist. Then there was the recent release of Benedict XVI’s remarks on Evangelization that he gave in one of his homilies at Fatima in his recent stay.And then this posting!
All in all, this made for an excellent homily I gave at this morning’s Communion Service in my parish.
Thanks, greg, for this posting!
posted June 5, 2010 at 11:23 am
Somehow, that a Catholic priest is accusing those who eschew organized religion in lieu of something more pure as “egotistical” smacks of incredible hypocrisy.
Does he seriously think the Catholic Church is not responsible for driving thousands and thousands, probably millions, of people away from organized religion?
The usual Catholic response to these kinds of stories is to blame anyone and anything other than themselves.
God is the final judge. God isn’t going to care about your card-carrying membership status in any one given organization. He is, however, going to care about what you actually did in this world, and what the Catholic Church has done and the never-ending ripple effect of the sheer evil perpetrated at the hands of priests, bishops, cardinals and popes is what he is going to see, not the gold and glitter and incense and stained glass windows and the CCC.
posted June 5, 2010 at 12:56 pm
Thank God I’m a Catholic, and have a Family, the Church to guide me to true sprituality, which is a long, sometimes difficult journey.
posted June 5, 2010 at 1:15 pm
Thank God I have Christ…
posted June 5, 2010 at 1:15 pm
Aqua,
Did you have some kind of divine revelation? You seem to know exactly what God is going to care about?
Don’t worry yourself about the RCC, it will be around long after you are dust.
posted June 5, 2010 at 1:22 pm
Deacon, I really used to like your blog. Anymore it’s an occassion of frustration, bitterness and sin for me. Sorry to sound to self righteous Panthera and Aquamarine.
Rick
posted June 5, 2010 at 1:23 pm
Spiritual but not religious can be a cover for flakiness, but more and more I think it is a statement of sincere seekers. People are seeing organized religion for what it usually is: an instrument of secular power over others. If “Burger King Spirituality” is the failing of SBNR, it is born as a reaction to the centuries of the “North Korea-style Spirituality” offered by churches. They are also turned off by the “religious but not spiritual” crowd of Christian reactionaries who pride themselves on pharisee-like theological and ideological purity but reflect nothing of the spirit of Christ.
posted June 5, 2010 at 1:27 pm
Oh, lots of things will be around long after I’m dust! Of that I am sure. I will, most likely, be dust within the next 12 – 24 months. The concept of being dust is extremely real to me.
Yes, I did have a revelation. And I know what matters now.
I don’t think you sound self-righteous, Rick. I think you sound honest, and I think you ought to follow your conscience. If being around people who don’t think exactly like you is a source of sin for you, you absolutely should remove yourself from such occasion of sin.
posted June 5, 2010 at 1:36 pm
Rick,
It has sunk to a level where only those who disagree with the Church, have left the church or are frustrated because of their choices in life have become the major mouthpieces here.
They seem to have had divine revelations beyond the scriptures as to what is be held or not held. Many seem overly preoccupied with what is below the belt and not what is above the neck. The bizarro world is what is unnatural becomes natural. Psychiatry and what feels right becomes right. Abortion is a healthy choice. Pathetic.
posted June 5, 2010 at 3:53 pm
It’s not disagreement that bothers me. It’s the lack of respect and mockery. I enjoy a good, respectful, thoughtful debate
Rick
[I hear you, Rick. And I agree. I'm trying to be more aggressive in hitting the 'delete' button with some commenters, and banning others. I struggle with walking a fine line between moderation and censorship. It would be helpful if more people familiarized themselves with my guidelines, which I re-post from time to time. But thank you for your patience, and for sharing your thoughts. It's an imperfect system, and I'm trying to make it better. Dcn. G. ]
posted June 5, 2010 at 4:55 pm
To make it a little clearer, I wonder many of those who mock the RCC visit the blogs of other faiths and disparage them?
What I find amusing is the constant talk about things sexual as if no one ever lived a celibate life or that celibacy was abnormal. Didn’t you ever have an umarried aunt or uncle. You think they weren’t celibate?
The reliance on the psychobabble and the elite intellectualism of those who lean to the left is laughable.
posted June 5, 2010 at 9:15 pm
I consider myself one of those “spiritual but not religious” people. My life is guided by the good I find in many religions, not just one particular faith. My life if full and happy without belonging to a named faith. Life is full…and joyful for me and for many others who fall into that catagory…SBNR. I was raised in the Methodist tradition…for the first 17 years of my life. However I found that that didn’t work for me and left. 45 years of marriage, 2 kids and a wonderful husband and I haven’t changed my mind. There wasn’t a name for being spiritual way back then…but I have no urge to go back, even though my 2 sisters are devote Christians. We 3 do get along well, and accept each other as we are.
Having said that, I respect those who have a particular denomination or faith. That works for them, just as what I do works for me. Commenting on things on all the blogs that I find interesting and giving my opinions are not done with any intent to put down that religion, but if I find something that I think is really ridiculious, or something I find great, I mention it. IMO most folks (by no means all) don’t intend to be hateful when commenting. Just my opinion ….
posted June 6, 2010 at 12:08 am
I read Deacon Kandra’s excellent thread on Elizabeth Scalia’s position regarding Nancy Pelosi and thought: Wow. We really do have to work together, regardless of our differences.
Mrs. Scalia motivated me to contemplate my positions and consider where I could find common ground with conservative Christians.
When I read some of the comments here, I wonder if such common ground is even possible.
In many ways, this blog is the last refuge for those conservative Catholic Christians who simply have nowhere else to go on beliefnet. Rod Dreher, except on one topic, is far too intellectual and fair for them to feel comfortable.
The rest of beliefnet is either way off in either a non-Christian or just barely Christian space or simply closer to my liberal Christian beliefs.
Deacon Kandra, I am trying (not always succeeding, I admit and beg forgiveness) to follow your guidelines. Especially when attacked, I tend to respond.
At the same time, whether it be me or one of the many many other Catholic Christians or non-Catholic Christians or spiritual non-Christians who have much to contribute here, the conflicts will remain.
We are in the middle of a hot war. The culture wars are genuinely the focus point for Christians in America right now. I, for my part, will follow the guidelines more closely. Perhaps Deacon Kandra will decide to make certain threads off-limits for all except those to the right of Elizabeth Scalia. Perhaps he will ask some of us to leave off posting or only to post after he has approved our submissions. Whatever the solution, the war goes on. If we can’t find a way to work together, then we are failing as Christians.
posted June 6, 2010 at 1:38 pm
As always, Panthera, well said!