November 2009 Archives

When is it time to cut the parental purse-strings? It seems these days that's happening later and later - or never, at least among some of the people I know. Maybe it's because our parents' generation earned more or saved more wisely than my own, but I seem to be part of a subset that's (at least partially) subsidized by loving, doting parents.

One friend I know uses her mother as her mortgage holder. Others accept help putting their kids through private school. I myself have been the recipient of my family's largess too often to enumerate. It's been an enormous help.

But is it wrong?

I've been following CNN.com's "Killings At The Canal: The Army Tapes," an investigation into the circumstances leading up to, and following, the premeditated murder of four Iraqis in 2007. I suppose I've been waiting for my lightbulb moment when I would understand how so many people believe these soldier's actions were defensible -- I have yet to have it.

Let me preface by saying that I do sympathize with the idea that our soldiers in combat are subject to the type of on-going trauma that I can't even begin to understand, all in the name of duty, and in the name of protecting our country. However, I just can't bring myself to agree with those that consider these men heroes, or believe that they should be excused from their part in this incident. To do so, in my opinion, is akin to saying anyone who witnessed a murder (or some other severe trauma) should receive a get-out-of-jail card if they too commit murder.

But this is a special case, you may say. These are the men and women fighting to protect our country. Yes, they are. But what exactly are they fighting to protect?
 

Have any horror stories or funny tales of Black Friday sales past? Tell us in the comments field below. 

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Goshdarnnit, Hillary...your oblications and holiday survival tips post puts me in the position of bad angel. Nonetheless, I gladly pick up the horns and pitchfork to make my personal pitch for skipping oblications for...self-gratification vacations? 

A few years ago I had the questionable pleasure of having some very distant relatives visit for Thanksgiving. At first I looked forward to it; I've always liked the idea of having family around for the holidays, especially since most of our immediate family lives in India. But the reality of it? Well, it was a stressful mix of polite conversation and pandering, at least until one relative got a little too comfortable and started sharing his racist views on the world. At that point it just became a ticking time bomb before I simply lost it.

Oblication: I thought I invented the word, but one quick web search, and I find I'm not alone. Nope, I guess I will not be the only one trepidatiously packing her best behavior along with her sunscreen and her flip flops this December for an in-law-tastic family holiday vacation.

Now, what you need to know is, I struck gold with my in-laws, in much the same way I did with my husband. Not only are they smart, reasonable, caring, thoughtful, kind, funny, and etc., they even lean politically in the same direction as we do so we don't argue heinously over current events at the dinner table. But best of all, they live all the way out in Alaska. And we all know what they say about absence....

So normally, we're all very fond indeed.

My in-laws are generous with their time and advice, and, this vacation season, are being more than generous with their timeshare property too, giving up an extra week of their own time so we can all stay together for a week and enjoy the vacation together.

So why do I feel like a condemned prisoner being led, drum-roll and all, to the gallows?

(Read on for Hillary's holiday survival tips...)