Recently in Practical Ethics Category

Ever heard the phrase, "High Class Problems"? As I understand it, it refers to those who bitch and moan about their woes, when they really have it pretty good. In other words, if you look in the dictionary, you'll find a picture of little old me.

Like, recently, I've been whinging about this temp job I accepted. I told a friend the other day, "OMG, a monkey could do this job. Only, a monkey would throw feces at the screen to break up the tedium."

Deep down I know I'm lucky to have the assignment. The economy's so scary right now, it's no time to be looking a gift gig in the paycheck. People like me who have no gratitude should really go suck it.

In fact, Paddy and I were talking about this subject the other day in regards to a mutual friend, who annoyed us both when, just as we were bemoaning our meager salaries, he asked our opinion on whether he should buy a new house in the Hamptons or Fire Island.

But it made me think about how easily we can envy what others have, and even, sometimes, lose friendships over it. When there's an inequity between friends, there's often a strain, from vacations one can take while the other can only admire the snapshots afterward, to babies and husbands/wives that give one friend grief, while the other longs just to have those babies or that spouse to bitch about. Left untouched, those resentments can fester...

Or do they?

And does the intent matter?

I'm settling in to do some writing at my local coffee joint, getting all prepared to talk...you know...ethics 'n' stuff. I make sure I buy enough (a black & white cookie and a large decaf latte) to justify the amount of time I'll be hanging around taking up one of their tables (maybe half an hour, tops). I only grab as much sweetener as might actually, feasibly sweeten the coffee I have, rather than stuffing 80 packets in my purse, the way some people do. Heck, I don't even plug my laptop in without first making sure the staff don't mind.

Basically, what I'm trying to say is, I believe in good restaurant etiquette. I know these little java joints have a slim profit margin, and nibblers like me aren't helping by hogging their tables, mooching off their internet while we nurse a single bagel for three hours.

Which is why I tip at least a buck with each purchase when I plan to hang out in a coffee house to work, even if all I'm getting is a beverage that costs roughly that same amount.

Yet when I dropped my dollar in the bucket today, I got grumpy. Not that I resented spending the money. If I want to save cash, I can work from home. And the baristas are quite nice at the café I frequent. So it wasn't the money or the service that got my goat.

The problem was, they didn't notice.

I'm reminded of a classic Seinfeld episode, "The Calzone." 

"Usually, when the masses exit a station, any poor unfortunate soul trying to catch the train in the station has lost all chance of getting through the turnstile. Perhaps that is the new moral question - should the masses wait and let riders make the train they just vacated, before blocking all the turnstiles? Or does the desire to get the hell out of the damp, hot, gross station take precedence to anything else?"