What Little Girls Should Get to Do (by Bob Massey)
Part four in a series of posts by Bob Massey, a Los Angeles screenwriter who is currently traveling to India with a team from Ecclesia Hollywood hosted by a faith-based human rights organization whose work in Mumbai concentrates on rescuing girls from sexual slavery. + Click here to read previous posts
One of the genius moves of this anti-trafficking program in Mumbai is that they don't just bust bad guys and rescue girls from sex slavery. They spend as much effort helping those girls recover.
The girls are set up in a group home where they're cared for, educated, trained for the workplace - but primarily loved. Most of them were sold into slavery by impoverished parents. So you can imagine (actually, no you can't) some of the feelings they must deal with.
In the morning we went to meet the staff and share some prayer time with them. They start the workday as a team, reading and pondering Jesus's words about love and justice, praying, and singing. Gotta say, I've never before been in an office where that happened. You realize: these people aren't just lawyers and such; they're on an actual mission from God.
Which seems like just a bunch of words until you meet the girls. They are between 15 and 18 years old, all rescued from lives of abandonment, rape, and abuse. They look about 10 to 13. They are so cool. Hilarious, talented, sweet, goofy, curious, shy, polite, utterly enamored of Bollywood musical stars and showing us their Bollywood moves. Lucky for us we had David, our heavily tattooed co-pastor who has no shame on the dance floor. David wiggled around in waves. The girls giggled hysterically. It was a blast.
We spent the rest of our hours with them getting to know names, getting impromptu Hindi lessons and then butchering it, making weird little fuzzy muppetish critters out of glue and sticks and fuzzy colorful balls, doing conga lines, and generally being ridiculous. It was wonderful. And then we had to get back in the van to leave.
That's when it sinks in for the first time. We'd just joined a bunch of girls to horse around and be goofballs (polite, well-mannered, sweet-natured goofballs, in their case), which - and let me emphasize this point - is what little girls should get to be.
Here's one thought shared by all the men in the van: men - males - have a lot to answer for.
[Right here is the place to insert Bob's kneejerk impulse to legally mandate slow, painful castration of perpetrators of sexual crimes against girls, for which Bob happily volunteers to hold the sharp knife on every one of the bastards, twice. But then take a deep breath and replace all that with some standard Christian boilerplate about forgiveness yadda yadda, and then to go cite some scripture verse so you people at home can wrestle with the tension between justice and mercy on your own time. But Bob's not actually in the mood for grace at the moment and it'll take him a while to come around, so let's just pretend it happened so Jim Wallis doesn't come put Bob the guest blogger in a wicked headlock. Thanks.]
Okay, but, seriously: someone SOLD these girls. Maybe the parents were conned into their girls would go to the city to work as domestic help or whatever. But, people, what measures would you NOT take if guys paid to rape your daughter/sister/niece/girlfriend?
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Comments
I heard a BBC report on this kind of thing - it may not have been specifically about India - but I was left with the impression that usually that is indeed the case: the girls and their parents are conned into believing they're being hired for domestic help and other low skilled (non-sexual) forms of employment.
Paul - originalfaith.com
Posted by: Paul M Martin | October 29, 2007 11:12 AM
Any chance we could get more of this sort of thing on this blog? I like honesty. Honesty is far more interesting than the "standard Christian boilerplate about forgiveness yadda yadda, and then to go cite some scripture verse so you people at home can wrestle with the tension between justice and mercy on your own time".
Way to go Bob. I find your posts to be a breath of fresh air.
Posted by: Anonymous | October 29, 2007 11:18 AM
On a gut level there's a lot of common ground here between right and left. I can certainly understand Bob Massey's anger.
If anyone had a contact for this group, I might be inclined to send them a check, politics be damned.
Wolverine
Posted by: Wolverine | October 29, 2007 12:29 PM
It's Monday and prayers were offered for the safety of our military personnel all around the world and in the Middle East.
Blessings -
.
Posted by: Moderatelet | October 29, 2007 2:10 PM
If the standard Christian boilerplate pre-empts righteous anger and a recognition of God's justice, then dispense with the boilerplate. God is as angry as you, and if these men do not repent, castration (and much worse) awaits them in the afterlife.
But, when the anger has subsided, let us recognize that this is what the rejection of God looks like. Without God, we are beholden to Satan. Is there any question that Satan wants absolute evil to reign? How then, should we be surprised when men deliver themselves to at his feet by engaging in the most shameful acts known to man.
Satan is worthy of every ounce of anger and condemnation.
Posted by: kevin s. | October 29, 2007 4:32 PM
Don't know if the "faith-based human rights organization" referred to here is International Justice Mission specifically but I do know that they are lawyers and that they do do work on sex trafficking in India. More information can be found at IJM.org. David Batstone's book was featured on the IJM homepage a while back..... Just FYI
Posted by: Debbie | October 29, 2007 5:44 PM
There's the horrendous treatment of the girls by their abusers, then there the horrendous decision of their parents/caregivers (assuming they weren't all duped), then theres the horrendous situation those parents must have been in to make that decision in the first place.
The horrendous situation didn't force the parents hand and the parents selling of their daughters didn't force the men to abuse them (there must be accountability at every level).
How can we help these girls and how can we help prevent this from happening again and again? At all three levels (abusers, parents, societal) what must we do to address this evil?
God help us.
Posted by: Trent | October 29, 2007 7:31 PM
Trent,
For starters you and I take it for granted that women are not cattle. For all the talk about the pervasiveness of sexism in our respective cultures, we are light years ahead of some of (for example) India. Of course, sexual assault still happens, but we actively fight it, and make every effort to imprison those convicted of it.
If we cannot bring other cultures to a sort of renaissance as it respects the treatment of humans, we cannot expect to meaningfully combat the problem. In their eyes, it isn't rape. The Bible provides a guidebook for the treatment of women, and how sexuality ought to be handled.
Posted by: kevin s. | October 29, 2007 8:22 PM
There is only eight (8) comments so far on this blog.
That says a lot about where we are as a morally sound society here "in the West." Progressive ideology is anything but.
Little girls have the right to be little girls. But what is it they are seeing and hearing "in the West?"
Femiinism here in America has sold these gilrs out just as much as the parents of a child sold into th sex-slave market. I rail on and on about "Progressives and Liberals" because these kinds of people have injured children in the West every bit as much as the more blatant societies that treat little girls as objects "TOO."
My 11-year old little girl is in a private "Christians" school to be away from sexual licentiousness taught to her in school and Liberal and Progressive doctrines and dogmas. ALL of which tell her to have sex in ANY way she wants to and she can get birth control pills or an abortion to keep her on that path. In America children have the "right" to sell themselves into sexual slavery and Hollywood, MTV, Vanity Fair, Planned Parenthood, and just about every TV channel and radio station will help them.
We have group homes in America too. FILLED to overflow with shattered and broken children. ALL of which have been shattered by adults not being morally sound. And in America, there are no adults dancing with the girls innocently and telling them that sex is for a proper time and within the confines of a beautiful marriage. No, no, in America, as in all of the western "progressive" world, children are encouraged by psychological and mental health professionals to have "safe sex."
Another malevolent form of sex slavery.
God Bless the work you are doing with the children of forced sex slavery.
Posted by: Donny | October 30, 2007 7:54 AM
Donny,
I went to a high school where my Conservative, Christian homeroom teacher taught me about birth control and condoms. The reatlity at my high school (and in much of the world) was that 17 year old girls were having their second and third child with the understanding that more children meant a bigger welfare check.
Lucky for me, I had parents who taught me that yes, that is the reality at your High School but that I can make the decision live by a different set of rules. And I can be friends with these misled girls.
I do not think it is of any value to blame sex education on "Liberal and Progresive doctrine" in America. I also do not think it is of any value to pull your children out of the public school system to sheild them from the realities of this world.
Don't get me wrong, I went to a very fine Christian Liberal Arts school for my undergrad studies. I loved the positive environment I experienced there. But I went there for the right reasons - not to escape what I disagreed with in the world but to learn and grow in my faith so that when I graduated, I could enter the secular world with a good head on my shoulders. I am thankful for all that I was exposed to before entering the "Christian Bubble" that so many Christian schools opperate under.
Please do not think that sending your children to a Christian schools removes them completely from the sexual corruption in this world. Never have I experienced such a concentrated number of girls suffering from anorexia and bulemia as I did at my Christian university. Just like anywhere else in this country, girls are placed under enormous pressure to be sexually appealing by the media's standards.
In relation to this article, if Bob Massey and his friends had feared being exposed to a corrupted system, who would be in India showing these girls how to laugh again? I praise the Lord for my Christian brothers and sisters who step boldly out into the world in hopes of making a positive change in the name of God - regarldess of where they stand politically.
Posted by: CJH | October 30, 2007 10:24 AM
Donny,
I have to disagree with you here. The reason there are so few comments on this post is more likely to because there's very little to disagree about.
One's tolerance for child prostitution has very little to do with politics and a lot to do with whether or not one is a particular type of Really Sick Puppy.
Yes, the objectification of women has a part to play in this, but there's a very important difference between the sort of licentiousness you describe and what Massey saw in India: Britney Spears and Co. may be selling themselves, but nobody forced them to do it, and if any of them gets a clue they are free to stop doing so any time. The little girls in India cannot.
And much as I disagree with modern feminism, not all feminists support this sort of erotic hype.
At any rate, what we have in the west are free people acting recklessly. The girls in India were essentially held as chattel property and used to generate revenue. I'm not saying that either is good, but it is entirely possible and I suspect fairly common to tolerate the first and be appalled by the second.
Wolverine
Posted by: Wolverine | October 30, 2007 11:40 AM
I consider myself a fairly radical feminist -- a grown woman has a God-given right to do what she choose with her own body, and a political system does not have the right to stop her (her actions may be sinful, of course, and a religious system may say so, hopefully equally saying so of the man involved).
My radical feminism makes me feel pretty much like the writer of this blog about slow painful castration for the men who would take a child's innocence -- and more, I recognize that this is possible because women continue to be seen as property. Recognize that we're people, fathers and brothers, and we'll quit getting sold to sex traffickers.
And, guys, I'm a social worker in suburban Maryland -- those trafficked women and kids don't all stay in Asia; you can find them right here close to home; there is lots of money in the import of sex slaves into the US and nowhere near enough spent fighting it.
Posted by: afeminist | October 30, 2007 7:35 PM
a grown woman has a God-given right to do what she choose with her own body,
Your body is the temple of God , its not a God given right , its a Hillary Clinton promoted political perversion .
Posted by: TRUTH | October 31, 2007 3:24 AM
Little girls can best be little girls in places where women and men are treated equally. In the United States misogyny s the why behind the sexual promiscuity and commercialism that shortens childhoods. As I read the article I gave thanks for the biblical feminism that I have been seeped in from my Christian college on that has taught me that all women and men are made in God's image and should be treated with respect and dignity. Over and over again I have been told by other mothers that they wish their daughters could belike my daughter- strong, witty, independent, not concerned about boys, makeup and clothing. I want to tell them you have to be the change you want to see in your daughters. Here is a short list of things to do to keep little girls healthy and strong enough to stand up to a U.S. culture that is perverse. 1)Modest dress from birth- no spaghetti straps or two piece swimsuits 2) No makeup until 16 3) No "boyfriends" until 16 4) No fashion or celebrity magazines. Just as important are the Yes factors: 1)Yes to leadership opportunities 2)Yes to speaking opportunities 3) Yes to volunteering for things they can care about like the environment 4)Yes to creativity. The most important Yes is introducing our little girls to the feminist Jesus who said that unless we all become like little girls we will not find the Kingdom.
Posted by: Cheryl Thomas | October 31, 2007 11:35 AM
Bob, I understand the anger, the concern and the protectiveness under your expressed desire to seek revenge. I appreciate your willingness to look at such a difficult and painful situation.
On the other hand, we are invited by Jesus to a standard beyond "returning an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth" to the forgiveness you dismiss.
Forgiveness is not to say - "Oh, no big deal, hurt children, it is all ok." Forgiveness, as I understand it, would say, "This is not acceptable, you may not continue doing this. Now, let's figure out how your life got so screwed up that you became disconnected from yourself / your soul so completely that you could so injure a child. And let's address that problem too." Forgiveness is to not to say - "You are so evil that you deserve torture, and I am so good that I can administer it", but to say instead, "There, but for the grace of God go I. If I had the same life experience as that person had, I can see that I too could have made such horrendous decisions. Looking carefully at myself, I see that I, too, sometime have neglected to see the humanness in others and have acted toward them in ways that met my needs at the expense of theirs. "
I think Martin Luther King was the one who said "Leave violence to those too weak to love." I hope you will find the courage to hold your deep concern for the girls and expand it to everyone in the system.
Posted by: peacemaker | October 31, 2007 12:29 PM
Folks, if you look around in our U.S. cities & towns, we have young adolescents and women of various ages who, for whatever reason have either been "sold" or "trapped" into sexual slavery, i.e., prostitution, or who are being raped and molested from an early age by adult males -- in their own homes or families. Sometimes with their mothers' consent, and sometimes not.
Sexual trafficking is not something that happens primarily in other countries and cultures, or that is brought here from abroad. Right here in the U.S. we have enough men to support such a vile and violent subculture as prostitution, which continues to keep women and young girls -- and even boys -- captive. People often have no clue as to what happens when someone attempts to help a girl get out of prostitution in the U.S. The people making money off these children & women are ruthless.
I am a child & adolescent therapist and marriage & family therapist who has had countless clients, both young and old, whose lives have been ravaged by such abuses. This includes women who have struggled to escape from sexual slavery -- from their pimps -- right here in the U.S. There is no need to detail the immeasurable pain and suffering and the difficult road to healing, experienced by those fortunate enough to escape.
I am grateful for Bob's comments, and the efforts of those with whom he is traveling. I would caution people against thinking we don't have as much work to do on sexual trafficking in the U.S.
Blessings to you all.
Posted by: Ms. LPC/LMFT | November 2, 2007 9:58 AM
As a response to a couple of previous posters:
Yes, honesty is good. I very much appreciate Bob telling us what he really thinks. However, as someone who was raped as a little girl, I have struggled with this issue in no small capacity and have come to the difficult realisation that, much as I'd like to advocate painful castration twice, I still believe in standard Christian boilerplate forgiveness yadda yadda. Punishment, certainly, and don't let the sick [bleep]er near a female of any age or species ever again, please, but forgiveness. That doesn't mean I could look my rapist in the face again and not have the urge to torture him slowly to death, but it does mean I would neither do it nor advocate it being done. There are some things, such as forgiveness, that apply to everyone, no matter their crimes. That's why that big bloke in the sky is the ultimate judge, and not us humans. I also happen to think He has a very good sense of justice, and I'm content with that.
Just a thought. Carry on, everyone.
Posted by: Anonymous | November 4, 2007 4:20 PM
Having lived in the Far East I know that some parents know what they are getting their daughters in to. However, monetary demands (and sometimes drug addiction) exceed their daughters' value. Sometimes when children are returned their parents sell them again.
Some young women are fooled into accepting a job they know to be seedy, like waitressing in a strip club, with promises of big money. It's really a racket so the woman has to prostitute herself to pay back the enormous debt she incurred moving to the big city. Several Soldiers I knew had to pay off their fiancées' debt to Madam/MaMa-San, who by the way, probably started out being exploited herself. One might expect compassion from someone who had been similarly exploited, but evidently, prostitution hardens the heart. This may explain why prostitutes self medicate with drugs and alcohol.
Personally, I dislike Hilary Clinton, but she had nothing to do with this. This type of behavior occurred in biblical times. Don't you remember Lot offering his daughters to the men who wanted to know the angels or the man who put out his concubine to be raped to death? The problem is the low value of women. Remember in India and China they abort their female fetuses. If women are valueless, why not abort, sell, exploit, or kidnap them? Feminism, or the empowerment and increased value of women, prevents this type of exploitation. It doesn't cause it. And I teach anyone who will listen to be chaste for his or her station in life. 1. It's God's law and he is more loving, wise and courageous than I, so I have to trust him on this one. 2. It's in the woman's best interest even more than the man's. 3. I don't behave in ways I don't want my "children" to behave.
Posted by: Grizzly Mom | November 9, 2007 6:04 PM
I love this Bob....we missed you, Hollywood Bob! Where were you? Oh well, maybe another time. Pray for us, please. Thanks for lifting my spirits through this. God smiles on you.
Posted by: Ishmael's wife | November 20, 2007 3:22 PM
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