Idol Chatter

Idol Chatter

Everyone Loves a Jewish Boy (Or Do They?)

posted by Esther Kustanowitz | 4:24pm Thursday September 28, 2006

Are Jewish men attractive? TV doesn’t seem to think so. Sure, Ross Geller certainly had his moment in the sun, as did Paul Buchman before him. (And any Jewess would be out of her mind to refuse to “hug it out” with Jeremy Piven.) But today’s television shows seem to be making some rather harsh statements about my Hebrew homeboys.

For an example, try on this article in the NY Times reporting a slam on Jewish men in Ted Danson’s new show, “Help Me Help You,” which premiered this week. The article reports that one of the characters, played by Suzy Nakamura, “goes to the Jewish matchmaking Web site JDate to meet men, then promptly repels them. Asked if she is even at all Jewish by one man on their first date, she admits she is not and explains, ‘I guess I find Jewish guys a lot less threatening because I’m not attracted to them.’”

A recent episode of “Next” (the latest addition in the MTV dating show legacy established by “Dismissed” and “Room Raiders”) featured one guy proclaiming his tribal membership by wearing an “Everyone Loves a Jewish Boy” t-shirt. He gave his date cookies, told her it was his grandmother’s recipe, and then was promptly dissed and dismissed rather harshly: “I’m not into David Schwimmer meets Napoleon Dynamite…” Adding insult to injury, the show’s voiceover said, “For [guy's name] it wasn’t hava nagila, but hasta la vista…”

As the author of “Boy Vey! The Shiksa’s Guide to Dating Jewish Men,” Kristina Grish has spent a good deal of time singing the praises of Jewish men, and she tells me that she thinks it may be a lack of classical machismo that ails the male members of the tribe. “I’ve always found Jewish men to be warm, articulate, generous, and doting,” she says, musing that “perhaps these are the qualities [Nakamura's character in 'Help Me Help You'] considers to be ‘nonthreatening’ because they can be considered ‘soft.’ But I also think they’re smart, entrepeneurial, passionate, and funny as hell… none of which screams ‘wuss.’”

Take Ross Geller from “Friends” as an example, Grish says: “He tiptoed around his feelings for Rachel season after season, and that lack of chutzpah made him unattractive. Give his personality some oomph, and suddenly those doe-eyes would seem dreamy instead of drippy.” She cites other examples–Piven, Jon Stewart, Jake Gyllenhaal, Ben Younger–”all Jews, all hot.” I’ll add Zach Braff, because I have to, and Oded Fehr, because how could you not?

Grish further noted that the women who responded to her book–whether or not they were Jewish–”couldn’t STOP praising Jewish men – and there was no mention of nerdy or unattractive implications. So many Jewish men boast Mediterranean good looks–complete with big eyes, curly hair, dark features and endearing freckles. What’s not to love?”

Despite what TV seems to tell us, and even if the stereotype seems to be indicating nerdlike or neurotic tendencies, Jewish boys are still coming out ahead–with an overall assumption that they are smart, funny, and nice. And Grish, whose new book is “Addickted: 12 Steps to Kicking Your Bad Boy Habit,” oughta know a nice boy from a naughty one.



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Comments read comments(43)
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bab ygirl491956

posted October 3, 2006 at 6:28 pm


My boyfriend is Jewish, and he is loving, giving and right down funny and down to earth type guy and i love him dearly



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wayne friedman

posted October 3, 2006 at 6:29 pm


tired of this discriminating stuff….my holocaust surviving dad taught me never to discriminate for any reason. its all the time, and not consiidered wrong……..a woman should like a person or dislike a person for who they are, what they like or dislike about them……why does it matter if they are jewish, black, spanish, what?????? GROW UP ALREADY.



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wayne friedman

posted October 3, 2006 at 6:33 pm


isnt it being hypocritical???/ the holocaust was the nazis punishing people for being non-them……..and so many of my jewish counterparts insist on judging people upon whether or not theyre jewish???? i am so tired of it, especially the denial stage that people ALWAYS go into.



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HASH(0xfd80bcc)

posted October 3, 2006 at 7:02 pm


I’m Jewish in spirit. I love my king David. How then could I not love Jewish men? Of course one needs to take individual character traits etc. into consideration, but should this not be a given when it comes to individual relationships, Jewish men notwithsrtanding? – people



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Linda

posted October 3, 2006 at 9:02 pm


Let me tell you…I am American and have hispanic roots. But if I ever divorce….again…Im going after a Jewish guy. They are the sons of the true King. They are God’s chosen own. And they are preety nice guys and many are good looking. You go boys!!! Sincerely, Secretly loving those Jewish boys in Manhattan



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Margie Merrick

posted October 4, 2006 at 12:31 am


some of the people who helped my family in the early 50′s, and 60′s when my parents were struggling to make ends meet with 3 children were Jewish business owners, and friends- the Jewish people are beautiful in face, in thought, in deed, in word, and they come across on t.v, in my opinion as nothing less than lovely- if anything, they are the character they portray, for the most part, and very photographable- I say those who say nay are just plain jealous!



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Mia

posted October 4, 2006 at 12:43 am


I married a Jewish man and he is disrespectful, spoiled and verbally abusive. My advice is to find a different type of man whom you can talk to without them yelling like Frank Costanza in return. They are against the norm, and always think they are right.



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Donna

posted October 4, 2006 at 4:13 am


I was raised in a Southern Baptist home, and I have always been attracted to Jewish men, even though they are hard to come by in this small town. The ones I have dated are WONDERFUL men, and they have more respect for women than most of the non-Jewish men I meet. I completely agree with Margie!



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eastcoastlady

posted October 4, 2006 at 6:11 pm


Mia, I’m sorry you had a bad experience. Don’t let one bad apple spoil the bunch for you. And I want to thank others for their kind words about my kinfolk. I am married to one of the best Jewish man on the planet. He accepts me, warts and all (figuratively speaking) and I consider myself soooooooooo lucky.



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eastcoastlady

posted October 4, 2006 at 6:16 pm


You know, it’s not just Jewish men getting a bad rap on TV. One of my favorite TV shows, Grey’s Anatomy, has a “Jewish” character, Christina Yang. Not only is she likely the most dysfunctional character on the show, she admits that she’s Jewish only under duress and the most stressful of situations, and openly claims her disbelief in G-d and lack of willingness to live her faith. She is Asian; her mother is a nagging, meddling yenta stereotype.Very frustrating. I don’t get it.



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Michael

posted October 4, 2006 at 8:07 pm


How about the three Jewish guys on Numbers? They all have great gualities that one can like. These trump any guys on MTV.



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revsharkie

posted October 4, 2006 at 10:49 pm


I was hoping someone would mention the Eppeses. I’ve been intrigued by David Krumholtz clear back to when he played a mentally ill man who stabbed John Carter on ER. All three of these fellows (played by Judd Hirsch, Rob Morrow and Krumholtz) are complex and interesting characters. Don’t forget, also, that when they asked David Duchovny about Fox Mulder’s religious faith, back in the heyday of the X-Files, he said he considered Mulder to be Jewish “until someone tells me otherwise.”



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Lisa

posted October 5, 2006 at 3:48 am


I nearly married what I thought was a wonderful Jewish man. Long story short, I found out he was hooked on the most disgusting internet porn (beastiality, BDSM, teens, etc. – some things I had never heard of.) but I still cannot shake the fact that while he had the unflattering characteristics about him, he still gave me the best year and a half of my life because he wasn’t a wife beater, verbal abuser, etc. I am black; not that it really matters, but throughout my life, Jews have been the ones to offer the most kindness and guidance to me. When I was lucky enough to have that Jewish boyfriend that I dumped, I felt loved for the first time (prior to seeing his true colors). Jewish men rock. I love the family unit that they offer, and in terms of their looks: I haven’t met a bad looking person yet. Looks have never mattered to me, it’s what’s inside – and what I found inside was a sense of innocence, loyatly and dedication to G-d. Thank you, Jewish people for always being so good to me since I was 12; and thanks to even that Jewish man I almost married to open my eyes that yes, I can keep looking, we are not perfect, but some things are naturally unacceptable to some. But as many Jews believe, ‘something good comes out of everything’. I truly believe that even after being heartbroken that G-d will hook me up with the right Jew for me. At least I hope He does! :) I am looking forward to converting someday after 28 miserable and hilarious years as a ‘Christian’. Even if I do not find a mate to convert with, I’ll do it on my own, but as some converts may say, it’s rather difficult. It has been for me. Peace, L



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Sandra Herschli

posted October 5, 2006 at 5:53 am


You’re missing Michael Rapaport in “The War at Home” and Brad Garrett in “Til Death”. Jewish guys are not “dissed”. sandherst



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dave

posted October 5, 2006 at 3:59 pm


Yes, us Jewish men are the most attractive men out there :-) Not knocking those who marry non-Jews, but why aren’t there more both-Jewish couples shown on TV? I’d like to see all three of the Eppses date some Jewish women. And marry Jewish.



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Penny

posted October 5, 2006 at 4:23 pm


How could Grish forget Adam Brody, the most gorgeous young Jewish male of them all?!



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Anonymous

posted October 5, 2006 at 5:39 pm


Jewsexy is the term I prefer… when I saw the Movie version of ‘Everything is Illuminated’ I hated what they did with Foer’s character because they totally didn’t go “Jewsexy”. I’ve seen pictures of Jonathan Saffron Foer and he is definitely Jewsexy! Talk about dream guy.



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revsharkie

posted October 5, 2006 at 6:13 pm


There’s not much on Numbers about whether or not the Eppeses are practicing their faith. I’d love to see one or even all of them deepen their ties to their faith.



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Marrano

posted October 5, 2006 at 8:10 pm


Ok, now what happen to us non-jewish looking jew? There are “many of us” also, you know? Jose-Porfirio



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Katie

posted October 5, 2006 at 11:51 pm


who wouldnt love a short(er), curly haired and gorgeous brown eyed man???? I am Jewish and I think other Jewish guys (especially practicing ones) are hott (with a double “t”)



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Stella

posted October 6, 2006 at 6:34 pm


Wow, Jake Gyllenhaal is Jewish? There went my last reason for not marrying him. LOL. (Alevai.) Seriously, no, I’m completely happy with my (hot, smart, buff, handsome, brilliant, and VERY masculine) Jewish boyfriend, but I’ve always found Jake Gyllenhaal amazing. Just amazing. He is one of my top five, my rotation of favorite actors – (which I realize also includes his sister after her recent movies.) So talented, sympathetic, and gorgeous. (So why didn’t I stalk him more? I have to find out on BeliefNet that he’s Jewish? I am slipping. My friends are slipping. Someone should have told me!) I made an assumption because of his last name that he was Swedish-something, dorkily forgetting that everyone has two parents, intermarriage is quite common, and being Jewish is matrilineal. I’m so happy to find this out. He’s one of ours! And so is Maggie, then. Yay tribe! I can’t help being pleased with this.



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Rebecca

posted October 6, 2006 at 11:31 pm


What about Jason Isaacs? He is Jewish. He is the actor who plays Lucius Malfoy in Harry Potter and he is in a new t.v. series call Brotherhood where he plays an Irish gangster from Rhode Island. He is absolutley gorgeous and talented. He has dark hair and VERY blue eyes.



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Walter

posted October 7, 2006 at 9:48 pm


It is not so much how they show Jewish men, but how they show jews. Who does the writing? How many desireable Jewish men or for that matter characters are considered serious and/or desireablle on Seinfeld, or the Nanny. The Police and Law show always show Jewish males as the pedophiles, weak, corrupted over privlidged something or other. Or, if a Jewish styled male, he is not up to the job or has a character deficit. Again who are the writrs? Mel Gibson’s Passion while insidiously maliciously anti-semitic in its own right, it is rather tame comparitively speaking!



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jennifer

posted February 28, 2007 at 6:51 am


jewish boys have those dark, fluffy curls and cutie pie noses. it makes me swooonnnn. like young bob dylan. ooohhh



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maria

posted June 12, 2007 at 6:57 pm


i LOVE Jewish boys. i wanna convert to Judaism very badly, though, im only 16. im 100% Italian but my parents never baptized us to Roman Catholic like they are us, because they wanted us to grow up to believe in what ever we want &+ im also planning on moving to Queens, New York w/ my friend, Ashley after college &+ im gonna find my dream jewish boy there. and after i do &+ after years of dating, im gonna convert &+ have him help me study &+ all =]



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Christine

posted July 22, 2007 at 8:48 pm


i go through weird stages of races and who i like. recently its been indians, then egyptians (which isnt a race) but i was all interested because this kid i liked was half egyptian. now its jews. i work at target and so many of them come in and some are soo good looking. it makes me wish i was jewish. maybe thats why i dont like working on saturday all of a sudden..
oh and adamn brody is jewish. i didnt know about jake was.



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Bobbie

posted August 9, 2007 at 7:44 pm


I fell in love with Jake Gyllenhaal, when I saw him, for the first time, in Brokeback Mountain. I had no idea he was Jewish.
Those eyesssssss



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MRSREDNY

posted August 18, 2007 at 12:36 pm


I GREW UP WITH JERRY SEINFELD – HE LIVED DOWN THE STREET FROM US AND WE GRADUATED THE SAME HIGH SCHOOL (HE IS IN MY YEARBOOK). JUST WANTED EVERYONE TO KNOW THAT EVEN AS A KID HE WAS HYSTERICAL!! LOVED HOM THEN AND LOVE HIM NOW!!



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Anonymous

posted December 2, 2007 at 5:58 pm


I just recently experienced a Jewish Boy, except he’s so manly with his sexy eyes and his high intellect and passion. I also heard the rumor about Jewish men being abundant in the love wand department…Yummy is all I can say. I love him
Princess



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Nicolette

posted February 6, 2008 at 8:46 am


I love Jewish men….I think they smart, sexy, gentle & all round decent. Alot of them not all ofcourse.
I’ve always had a thing for Jewish men…Not sure exactly why.
I’ve recently had a wonderful journey with a jewish man. Needless to say I’m very much in love with him even though his very work driven & is didnt work between us. He also was hurting a great deal inside from a relationship before. Nevertheless…His amazing…gentle (at times), positive, loving, forgiving & very very sexy….Graeme pure essence was just sexy in itself…
I love him to bit & miss him a great deal…
Jewish men have my vote of adoration.



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paisleymom

posted June 9, 2008 at 11:41 pm


Now see, I always thought it was all the TV shows I watched that made me have a “thing” for Jewish guys. My first crush was Gene Wilder…



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shiksappeal

posted November 5, 2008 at 6:29 pm


jewish men are gorgeous, alot of TV shows can be stupid and racist so screw those meanies. My boyfriend of over a year is a smoking hot hebrew hottie, and I absolutely love his obvious beauty and brains to match (;



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belinda ortiz

posted December 5, 2008 at 4:16 pm


what does the yamack mean



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Holocaust

posted February 3, 2009 at 6:28 pm


Why dont jews eat pork…..well they may be alot of things…but their not cannibals



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Jewish guy

posted August 8, 2009 at 10:55 am


I love how the women who tend to find Jewish men attractive talk about movie star celebrities, as if most people look like them. Like, I’m so attracted to Swiss people: you know, Swiss supermodels!
I think people are sort of racist in the US and if they haven’t grown up with certain ethnicities around them, they find them unattractive.
It’s like saying broad noses are ugly on black people, when it tends to just be a common physical feature, is quite beautiful if that is what you have grown up with and have imprinted in your mind is what people look like, and is only seen as different when pop culture shoves button nosed anglo airbrushed professionally lit and photographed people down their throats.
I’ve accepted recently that I’m most attracted to Jewish women, but unfortunately, I’m someone who lives simply and doesn’t dress flashy or purchase with abandon (I actually have millions, but hide this fact), so — bring on the stereotypes — Jewish women don’t really like me that much. Not all, but a lot of them are princesses. Gives Jews a bad name.
I guess we’re all a little racist, huh?
Though I am frequently told I’m quite good looking — maybe just for a Jew? — American women don’t seem to like me much. European women seem to love me though. Why is that?



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scottish lass, athiest

posted October 22, 2009 at 7:18 pm


My ex was jewish. I never loved till him. He is amazing in every way, I adore him. I would be however, be very impressed if this is just a jewish thing. There is no denying I am attracted to jewish men physically more so than any other ethnicity, but that’s just personal taste and not all jews look the same. Mickey Avalon anyone? Andy Samberg, Adam Brody………..all gorgeous!



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sausalito

posted December 4, 2009 at 6:37 pm


I know finding this blog and responding YEARS after the face is kinda silly but I am so in llluuuv with my jew-beau that i ran a google search… only to find my experience is in keeping with what others say here.
I have lived in 3 different countries, I have dated men of every religion and most major ethnicities…. except scots-irish like me, go figure I dont know why. I have found in my dating life that my experience closely matches stereotypes of others’ experience. On ALL counts be they Africa, Arab, Samoan (yes a Samoan man) and have found BY FAR the most respect, the most thoughtfulness, the best conversation, most honest and so kind not to mention sexyness which smoulders underneath like a geyser before it… um… aheh… blows….
Well lets just say that I am sold on the Jewish man. Every culture has a “paradigm” on how it views relationships and women. Of course you have individuality but there is also a culture which is the matrix for growth, expression and outlook predominates. I stumbled upon a culture of people, of men who are taught to earnestly respect their women unlike anything I have experienced before. It is amazingly refreshing. I can be just as funny, just as smart, just as successful and feel like I am ap artner not a conquest, a prize or a servant….



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Rita Vita

posted January 16, 2010 at 11:20 pm


Jewish boys are not typically physically attractive and they can be extremely crude, arrogant, and over-bearing.



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jason

posted February 12, 2010 at 4:23 pm


Hey Rita, Jewish is a religion, not a race or nationality, so how can being Jewish determine whether someone is crude or physically attractive???? I will also bet you, anything u want, that youd be attracted to me.



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Cass Goldber

posted June 24, 2010 at 4:15 pm


Jewish men are very loving and beautiful. I am a black woman and I find that if another black woman wants to date outside of her race she should seek a Ashkenazi Jewish man because they are so strong and intelligent. I met all of Adam’s criteria for a wife I was Strong, Smart, and Beautiful and also in Medical School and he was the same however in Law School.



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Jewcy Juice

posted September 6, 2010 at 9:15 pm


JEWISH GUY:
I agree with you point by point. I had to read your comment several times just to make sure it wasn’t me who wrote it. Dead on, my friend. Same boat…almost exactly (down to the hiding $$$ and European women preferring me).



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NO WHERE MAN

posted April 20, 2011 at 2:31 pm


all these comments are puree lies.
look at bob dylan , and ugly heny winkler , mell brooks and convice every one they are super models .



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Pat

posted January 1, 2012 at 2:48 pm


What about nice jewish boy David Rapoport in PA–? nice jewish boy married vet kills his girlfriend and their unborn child after promising her a date to spend the night together last year?? Just pleaded guilty. His mother sobs, and cries, and cries at the hearing. Oy!



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