iGens 5

I question her finding that adolescent girls do not have a self-esteem problem. Having been an adolescent girl once, having experienced first hand the textbook drop in self-worth once I hit 13, having talked with many peers and younger women who have felt the same, I don't buy it. I don't have empirical evidence, just experiential, but I've read and seen and felt enough to know for myself that it is true.

Take one look at the advertising industry, designed to make women feel too fat/ugly/inferior/inept in order to make us weak enough to buy whatever crap they are selling, and it's not hard to imagine where a self-esteem problem might come from. Add in a culture determined to value women only for their sexual appeal, tell a girl from the time she hits puberty until she dies that if she's not sexually desirable, she's not worth anything, and, well... seriously? She doesn't think that girls have a self-esteem problem?

Twenge and I would probably have a similar solution to the problem, however. Rather than trying to build a false self-esteem which will eventually fail, it would be better to take kids out of the toxic environment, and build true self-esteem based on something real.

I agree with Melissa. Everybody hates middle school, and most of high school, because everyone feels fat and awkward and uncool. Plus, you're supposed to have high self-esteem, so you feel bad about yourself for feeling bad about yourself.

I agree, though, that grade inflation is a problem.

Scot, thanks for making us aware of this book. It is now on my must read list. I have not been able to read all of the comments from previous posts in detail, so forgive me if this has been addressed before:

It is interesting that today we have a Calvin post about fall/depravity and a post on unhealthy self-esteem. I wonder if these two forces are influencing theology today. It does seem that many in the emerging/postmodern/whatever-you-want-to-call-it camp have a hard time with total depravity. In fact many (perhaps Pagitt and S. Burke), hold to the goodness of humanity rather than the sinfulness of humanity. Come Calvinists, as you mentioned yesterday, are strongly reacting against this.

Because the emerging movement is generally younger in age, is Twenge providing us a sociology of emerging that helps explain their theology?

I think Brian (5) is on to something worth thinking about, as is Patrick (6).

When I read the excerpt from Calvin, my first thought was, "Wow, he goes way beyond the text (esp. for a Calvinist! :))." No more image of God left, huh?

The issue of "made in God's image" is relevant to Scot's question: "How do we teach self-esteem without it turning into self-preoccupation, self-importance, or narcissism?" If the "we" is public schools, they cannot. People--not just me--matter because they matter to God. This also fuels the right approach to what we do and how well. Of course, how are schools run by the state going to teach this foundation of value? They cannot. And performance alone is not a sufficient substitute--not even close. Who wants to adopt (or give to one's children) a self-value based on performance alone? Do I want my children's teachers to only value children based on the child's performance? How can this lead to proper love of self, of neighbor, of enemies?

Yet more evidence showing that the state as we've constructed it is simply a very poor choice to operate schools, yet we persist.

She is exactly on target with this. I remember when our four kids, all 80s children, were being taught this self-esteem stuff in school. I told them then, "Yep, you're special-- just like everyone else in the world."
This, coupled with a theology that still teaches children (& adults) that they should "expect God's favor" has helped create the entitlement mentality that saturates our culture in and out of the church.
Real esteem comes from serving others, not inflating our own self worth.

RJS,

Duck, Duck, Grey Duck?

It's Duck, Duck, Goose.

Travis,

I'm not at all opposed to the state taking from all via taxes and paying for every child's education; I'm actually quite for it. It just needs to get out of the business of operating schools (with state actor-teachers, due process concerns, first amendment content issues, political games, bureaucratic inefficiency, long or incoherent lines of accountability, etc., etc.) and into the business of giving over-funded scholarships to each child. The state is a fantastic subsidizer of industries. It's a terrible operator of industries, especially where the industry necessarily involves values, idea/content selection, and the discipline of children. We've given the state a job it is terribly, terribly hampered to perform, like teaching children how to properly value themselves and others (but, P.S., don't violate the First Amendment!).

Travis and Brian in 5, 10 and 14 - if the iGens are the way they are in part because of emphasis by their Boomer parents on teaching them self esteem, focusing on their individuality, etc. . . . wouldn't it make sense (rather than be disproof of the generational theory) that some of the visible "parents" of the emerging movement would be Boomers? The emerging "theologies" being roughly analogous to the "theories" of education such as self esteem movements - initially started by certain Boomers but then picked up on by the next generation?

Karl, same as with Brian, I think you have the causal relationship backwards. Individualism/focus on one's own needs are symptoms of the modern church. The postmodern/emerging church is partly a reaction against that, in my opinion.

I don't think anybody has mentioned Chap Clark and his research--especially the book "Hurt" I've heard him speak several times--the latest was last month. He finds that our youth feel abandoned.

Karl @ 18,

Then we agree.

ChrisB, "we need to see how valuable we are to God lest we fall into despair and how sinful we are lest we fall to pride"

Exactly.

Travis and Karl, thanks for your input. And I agree with Travis that the primary impetus of the emerging church is a reaction to the many errors of the modern church. So I'm not sure how strong the correlation is between igens and the emerging church, but I think there is something there. Just as there is something about Hybels and his generation that influenced Willow Creek. Culture impacts how we think of God and the church...on this point postmodern thinking is spot on.

God looked at what he created and called it good. There's the foundation for self esteem.

It is interesting to juxtapose this post regarding self-esteem along side the other post regarding Genesis 2 and 3. My thoughts:

Some worry that the emphasis on self-esteem taught to the “Generation Me” (where we only play games with no winners, etc.) discourages achievement and undermines “real” self-esteem based on performance and outcomes. While this may be true from a worldly perspective, it misses the point from a Christian perspective. From a Christian perspective, whether or not my self-esteem is healthy or appropriate depends on the extent to which my self-esteem corresponds with this two-fold reality:

Reality # 1 (The Fall):

I am a sinner. The feeble arrow of my life “falls” pitifully to the ground. It does not even hit the target, much less the bulls eye in the middle of the target. In broader anthropological terms, the Fall is a metaphor for the enduring distance between the human condition in its evolutionary struggle to transcend its animal instincts and the teleological bulls eye of the human condition “in Christ”. In terms of Creation as a whole, the Fall is a metaphor for the distance between the state of the Creation in its frustration and futility (waiting with eager expectation) and the teleological bulls eye of the Creation “brought into the glorious freedom of the children of God”.

Reality # 2 (The Garden):

God loves me. As a member of the human race, I am the beneficiary of a Creation Covenant pursuant to which: (a) in addition to lovingly and graciously giving to Creation the ongoing gift of existence, God would give to Creation the perfect gift of God’s Self; and (b) all of Creation, by and through the “sons of God”, by and through Christ as their representative, would accept God’s gracious gift of God’s Self in perfect and transparent obedience and love, all to the glory of God. The Garden is a metaphor representing the fulfillment of this covenant -- the teleological bulls eye.

The only absolute value is God. The only value that exists in Creation is the purely subjective value that attaches to Creation by virtue of God’s covenants and dealings with Creation. God chose to enter into the Creation Covenant in sovereign freedom (i.e., “election”), from the foundation of the world (i.e., before I existed), knowing that the fulfillment of this Creation Covenant would come at a cost to God. Thus, my value, as a created being, is grounded in the sovereign, free and gracious election of God himself. Accordingly, my subjective value to God is impervious to the petty judgments of any created being, including the judgments of Satan and/or myself (which may be indistinguishable). This includes any mental exercise by which I attempt to define myself as “good” or as “evil”.

Thus, my attempt to get self-esteem by eating from the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil is completely off the mark. When I judge myself as “good”, I deny Reality # 1. When I judge my self as “evil”, I deny Reality # 2 (for God does not love evil). Moreover, my attempt to get self-esteem from the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil is inappropriate and unhealthy. It leads to endless cycles of self-serving judgment, self-defeating judgment, self-preoccupation, guilt, self-importance, defensiveness, self-hatred, and narcissism. It leads to death.

However, if my self-esteem is grounded in God’s love (the Tree of Life; Christ), I have no need to judge my self as “good” or “evil”. I can embrace the truth of Reality # 1 without feeling the need to defend myself. And I can stop searching for something in which to ground my worth or value or “goodness” and simply accept the truth of Reality # 2.

Thus, healthy and appropriate self-esteem, from a Christian perspective, is grounded in God, not in achievement, performance and outcomes. But this sort of self-esteem is not completely divorced from outcomes. Self-esteem that is properly grounded in God results from accepting God’s gracious gift of God’s Self (which includes the gift of God’s Spirit dwelling in us) which results in works of Love.