There are four major reasons given to teenagers at the time of their sexual awakening, for not engaging in sex.1. It's wrong -- and some just say "Because it's wrong!" while others reach into their sacred texts, like the Bible, or find some moral arguments against sex before marriage.
2. You can get pregnant or impregnate someone.
3. You can get STDs -- sexually transmitted diseases.
4. You can get "hooked" on sex.
This fourth argument, which can be called an emotional and neurochemical argument, has been proposed in a new book which many I suspect will find compelling. It is by Joe McIlhaney and Freda Bush, both MDs and both at work in research and teaching and writing about sexual health in America. Their book is called Hooked: New Science on How Casual Sex is Affecting Our Children
.What are you hearing about "hook up culture"? And what are you hearing about neurochemicals? (Any MDs out there reading this?)
Let us agree that the first three are used and let us also agree that the "warning" folks need to emphasize, as this book does at times, that sex is given by God and that it is good. Let us agree that this book comes from a conservative angle ... But, what are their basic arguments for the neurochemical issues involved in sex?
It works like this, and I'd like to know from MDs or science folks if this is accurate...
1. Dopamine is secreted in the brain and it tells those who are having consensual sex that such activity is pleasurable.
2. Oxytocin is secreted in a female's brain that bonds the woman to the man.
3. Vasopressin is secreted in a male's brain that bonds the man to the woman.
4. Therefore, neurochemicals are released that mold the brain through its synapses that tell each of these two people that they are in a bond of pleasure.
Add to this that teenagers' brains are more than hyped up for molding, and dopamine is desirable and addictive, and you've got the makings of potential good and potential disaster. Sexual activity begins to mold the brain in the direction of both pleasure and bonding with that person.
The most alarming feature of this book for me is that sexual activity neurochemically secretes the chemicals of bonding, but the hooking up culture increasingly divorces sexual acitivity from relational commitment. This works against the natural secretions of a body and leads to potential problems for each of the couples. Humans aren't wired, so the authors are arguing, to hook up. They are wired to love in lasting commitments. Breaking down lasting commitments works against what the brain is telling the person to be and to do. Hooking up can create young folks who break down their potential for connectivity.
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Great recommendation, Scot. As you know, the neurosciences are advancing at a considerable pace in discovering the neural correlates of human behavior. What we do, how we think, and what we experience alters how are brains are wired and contributes to who we are, or better, to who we are becoming. I’ve been pleased to see this fascinating science brought to a wider audience by scientifically reputable and accessible popular-level books. From a cursory review, this piece by McIlhaney and Bush may well be counted among them. I just placed my amazon order. As both physician and pastor, I have several reasons to promote healthy lifestyles and fruitful relationships. And the more informed I can be—adding neuroscientific explanations to those psychological, social, cultural, and spiritual—the better equipped I’ll be for the task. Thanks for bringing this to my attention. I’ll let you know what I think.
Does anyone really think that an adolescent with the juices of youth flowing will pay any attention to those four reasons the article starts with?
Charles, I'm sure there are kids that won't pay attention to it. But there are others that will. We have to reach out and help those that we can until the others are ready.
T, it has been helpful both for myself in giving counsel and in the recipient in their own process of facing their addictions.
Fred in #28,
Thanks for that. I really don't get why people have to keep bringing up the "kids will do it anyway" excuse, as if we expect to somehow eradicate teenage sexual activity with each new finding/argument/discussion on the issue.
No one's that naive. But that doesn't mean that no one will listen. And for those that do, they will (we argue, at least) be that much better off.
It's worth the effort.
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