J Walking

J Walking

The worst question in heaven

posted by David Kuo | 10:50pm Friday August 17, 2007

I was having lunch with a brilliant friend who also happens to be a wonderful storyteller. He is a philosopher and a lawyer and a Catholic.
What, he asked me, is the question I would least like to hear from God when he asks why I should be admitted to heaven?
My mind start racing – “What did you do for the poor?” “Why did you spend so much on Apple products?” “Why did you talk better than you lived?” There were just so many of them.
“Wanna know what mine is?” he asked.
Of course, I said.
He paused.
“Ok, so I get to heaven and God says, ‘I have one question for you. Suppose a train is leaving San Francisco at 70 MPH and another is leaving….”
That is actually a most terrifying question. Does anyone like those questions?
ADDITION: What is your horror question (in the spirit of the train question)? Mine might actually be, “Hey, remember all those years of Chinese you took? Say, ‘Please let me into heaven and you are in.’”



Previous Posts

Dancing... or drinking through life
I am not even sure that I know how to do a link anymore. I'm giving it a shot though so, three readers, please forgive me if I mess this up. So Rod Dreher's sister is battling cancer. It is nasty. Their faith is extraordinary. Here's his latest post (I think) There are 8 comments on it. As I scrolle

posted 3:05:22pm Mar. 02, 2010 | read full post »

Back...
I'm back here at JWalking after a bit of time because I just want someplace to record thoughts from time to time. I doubt that many of the thoughts will be political - there are plenty upon plenty of people offering their opinions on everything political and I doubt that I have much to add that will

posted 10:44:56pm Mar. 01, 2010 | read full post »

Learning to tell a story
For the last ten months or so I've been engaged in a completely different world - the world of screenwriting. It began as a writing project - probably the 21st Century version of a yen to write the great American novel - a shot at a screenplay. I knew that I knew nothing about the art but was inspir

posted 8:01:41pm Feb. 28, 2010 | read full post »

And just one more
I have, I think, just one more round of chemo left. When I go through my pill popping regimen tomorrow morning it will be the last time for this particular round of drugs. Twenty-three rounds, it seems, is enough. What comes next? We'll go back to what we did after the surgery. We'll watch and measu

posted 11:38:45pm Nov. 18, 2008 | read full post »

A Newfie for Obama
NPR asked me to do a short memo to the president-elect. I chose to do it on the dog he should choose... and why. Check it out.

posted 12:25:10am Nov. 15, 2008 | read full post »

Advertisement
Comments read comments(12)
post a comment
John E.

posted August 17, 2007 at 11:32 pm


I do, but I like algebra. I might also be on the Asperger spectrum.



report abuse
 

Thinker

posted August 18, 2007 at 12:08 am


Yeah – like do you remember that night in 10th grade……..?



report abuse
 

Chris Criscoine

posted August 18, 2007 at 1:00 pm


Why didn’t you have enough faith in me to try harder to do the things you knew were right? Why didn’t you believe in me enough to know I would give the strength you needed?



report abuse
 

Donny

posted August 19, 2007 at 12:31 pm


“Why did you talk better than you lived?”
That one is truly terrifying.



report abuse
 

Thinker

posted August 19, 2007 at 12:45 pm


Guys, guys, God forgives – we are human and can’t “do” our way to heaven. We need to relax a bit and trust that God will be in our lives however poorly we live it out. Having faith is about that awareness and trust that the presence of God will transform our very way of being – if we abandon, vengeance, anger, and the need to be powerful and correct. I sometimes think that need to be “right” is what makes us so very unChristlike. I believe Jesus gave up such things when tempted. And we embrace them again and again. The time in the desert is always so hard because we think that we can comehow get out of it on our own. We can’t. Jesus takes us out of the desert times – and doesn’t point a finger and say “I told you so.” That’s the sort of thing we do. It is in the desert that we can abandon ourselves and embrace the love of God. We become courageous after leaving the desert, but we can’t be afraid of being there. It’s part of the human journey.



report abuse
 

Dakota

posted August 19, 2007 at 3:57 pm


“Are you ready to show everyone in Heaven that videotape of your entire life like the Bible talks about?”



report abuse
 

John E.

posted August 19, 2007 at 5:04 pm


Dakota – I must have missed that verse…



report abuse
 

reddopto

posted August 19, 2007 at 8:13 pm


I thought terrorizing was what Hell was all about. Once we get that far, I don’t think there will be terrorizing treatment. Considering speeding trains, there should be plenty of time to learn all the math in the world in heaven (some of my math loving friends actually enjoy solving those kinds of problems.)
If God asks me embarrassing questions, I’ll say, “I was a fleshly schmuck. I’m only here because of Your grace and mercy.”



report abuse
 

Phil L

posted August 19, 2007 at 10:50 pm


Almost fell out of my chair on that last one, as if the math problem wasn’t funny enough! Thanks for the smile, David.



report abuse
 

Dakota

posted August 19, 2007 at 11:44 pm


John E.- I once misheard my pastor talking about God knowing all the thoughts and deeds of every man, thinking he said everyone in Heaven would see them as well. I thought to myself how embarrassing it would be for not only God to know but all of Heaven as well! However, I can still picture myself entering the gates of Heaven and having God ask me that question as a joke, knowing what I thought I heard years before.



report abuse
 

Matt

posted August 20, 2007 at 12:12 pm


I think being asked why I should be let into heaven is frightening enough. I shouldn’t be, but I trust that through Christ’s redemption I will be.
That said, I think it would definitely be the math. I can think up good answers to just about anything else, but I can’t b.s. my way out of math.



report abuse
 

canucklehead

posted August 21, 2007 at 2:12 pm


Which came first, the chicken or the egghead?



report abuse
 

Post a Comment

By submitting these comments, I agree to the beliefnet.com terms of service, rules of conduct and privacy policy (the "agreements"). I understand and agree that any content I post is licensed to beliefnet.com and may be used by beliefnet.com in accordance with the agreements.

Share this story


About Beliefnet

Our mission is to help people like you find, and walk, a spiritual path that will bring comfort, hope, clarity, strength, and happiness. More about Beliefnet.

Help

Media Kit

Subscribe

Legal

Copyright © Beliefnet, Inc. and/or its licensors. All rights reserved. Use of this site is subject to Terms of Service and to our Privacy Policy. Constructed by Beliefnet.

Advertisement

Report as Inappropriate

You are reporting this content because it violates the Terms of Service.

All reported content is logged for investigation.