I've always wanted to eavesdrop on a conversation between Siddhartha Gautama and Bill Wilson (the founder of Alcoholics Anonymous). I think they'd get along great: Both of these men found paths out of suffering in their own experience and went on to share them with many people. They both struck chords that have resonated for millions of people over the years.
The Twelve-Step way of life and Buddhism share many similarities and connections, even beyond the apparent compulsion to number important things. They're loaded with similar paradoxes: Buddhists take vows, but dwell on and in the impermanence of all things. Sober alcoholics "count days" of sobriety, yet survive one day at a time.
Here's what struck me the
most when I started hanging around with Buddhists, though: both Bill
and Sid got that we can't do it alone. Or rather, that we don't
have to. Thich Nhat Hanh wrote, "The Buddha said that Right
View is to have faith and confidence that there are people who have
been able to transform their suffering." Bill Wilson started off the
Twelve Steps with the word "we", and marked the beginning of AA
not from his own sobriety date, but from the date when he and AA's
co-founder got together to help a third alcoholic.
Why bother? Why not just get the home versions of the Twelve Steps and of the dharma? I'm sure it's possible - people who are not fortunate enough to live in New York City do it every day. But we are encouraged by both gentlemen to take refuge in the communities of those like us - because that's where hope comes from. When I look around my zendo, I see people who have been able to transform their suffering - and that makes it easier for me to sit for another 25 minutes. When I look around my home Twelve-Step group, I see people who have come a million miles from their histories of hardship and trauma - and that makes it easier for me to show up at the next meeting.
If I didn't have these powerful examples, I doubt I'd get very far, because I want guarantees. I want to be sure of the results before I take a step or make a commitment. My default is to wait for my fear to go away before doing the things I'm afraid of. I'd learn to swim when I'm not afraid of the water any more, I thought. I'd apply for that job, I'd sign up for a new class in a new place, I'd go on a retreat with people I don't know, I'd ride my bike down that unfamiliar street - when I'm "comfortable", when it "feels safe". That's how I used to run my life.
Obviously, guarantees are not forthcoming, so it's a good thing I've found Bill and Sid to help me along. I've learned to "make a ziff" - or "act as if" - acting my way into right thinking rather than thinking my way into right action, as they say in the Twelve-Step rooms. The Noble Eightfold Path holds a lot of this, too: Right Speech, Conduct, Livelihood, all lead us to awakening and serenity, rather than vice versa.
But I wouldn't have the courage to do any of this if I didn't have teachers, veterans, and peers around me in both circles. Today, I know that I don't need blind faith in either the Steps or the dharma: I have proof. All I need to do is look around.
Why bother? Why not just get the home versions of the Twelve Steps and of the dharma? I'm sure it's possible - people who are not fortunate enough to live in New York City do it every day. But we are encouraged by both gentlemen to take refuge in the communities of those like us - because that's where hope comes from. When I look around my zendo, I see people who have been able to transform their suffering - and that makes it easier for me to sit for another 25 minutes. When I look around my home Twelve-Step group, I see people who have come a million miles from their histories of hardship and trauma - and that makes it easier for me to show up at the next meeting.
If I didn't have these powerful examples, I doubt I'd get very far, because I want guarantees. I want to be sure of the results before I take a step or make a commitment. My default is to wait for my fear to go away before doing the things I'm afraid of. I'd learn to swim when I'm not afraid of the water any more, I thought. I'd apply for that job, I'd sign up for a new class in a new place, I'd go on a retreat with people I don't know, I'd ride my bike down that unfamiliar street - when I'm "comfortable", when it "feels safe". That's how I used to run my life.
Obviously, guarantees are not forthcoming, so it's a good thing I've found Bill and Sid to help me along. I've learned to "make a ziff" - or "act as if" - acting my way into right thinking rather than thinking my way into right action, as they say in the Twelve-Step rooms. The Noble Eightfold Path holds a lot of this, too: Right Speech, Conduct, Livelihood, all lead us to awakening and serenity, rather than vice versa.
But I wouldn't have the courage to do any of this if I didn't have teachers, veterans, and peers around me in both circles. Today, I know that I don't need blind faith in either the Steps or the dharma: I have proof. All I need to do is look around.
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Thank you! You make a powerful and important point. How do we know? How can we find hope if we do not see the power of recovery and the benefits of being a practitioner? What attacks us in the first place?
Thank you for this article. I have recently launched an online meditation centre (from the buddhist tradition) and am really focussing on the community aspect because I know the personal transformative power in reaching out, moving away from isolation and just generally, as you have expressed here, being transformed by either listening to or sharing experience, strength and hope...
thanks.
Thank you for this article. There are methods and principles connected to the 12 Steps that work very well with many forms of Buddhism.
In my book, the 12-Step Buddhis, I write about the connections and differences between the 12 Steps and modern psychotherapy, Zen and Tibetan Buddhism in some detail.
May it be of benefit.
There are similarities, but there's a fundamental difference to me. The 12 steps say that you are powerless and must turn your life over to the care of god, the higher power that has the power to save us. buddhism says that you have the power, not some external force, and by following the path you can tap into it.
I haven't found a sangha I feel comfortable with. I sit with a group, but I don't feel a sense of community with the members. I'm not particularly inspired by their example.
Wonderful article! I was a "Spiritual Seeker" 20 years before I found the gift for my life of A.A. and it's marvelous concurrence, and practical, tight consolidation of the many truthful disciplines. I have recommended to those not wishing to consider themselves "Alcoholic", to just live by the 12 steps anyway and find a lifting of suffering.
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