No one is perfect... that's why pencils have erasers. ~ Author Unknown
“What’s wrong with perfectionism?” you ask. “PLENTY,” I answer! … which, by the way, makes perfectionism totally imperfect.
Perfection is often linked with achievement, painstaking awareness to detail. Yet, it often produces procrastination (no point in doing something if I can’t do it perfectly), low self-esteem (if I am not perfect, no one will love me), low-productivity and in some cases obsession compulsive disorders, depression, sexual dysfunction, divorce and eating disorders.
Do or do not … there is no try. ~ Yoda, Star Wars
Life is full of obstacles, is it not? Therefore, life – in it of itself – is imperfect. Trying to be perfect goes against the grain of the natural flow of things, and it results in anxiety and fear of failure.
If perfectionism is interfering with your life, in any way (weigh), shape (pear shaped or apple) or form, I invite you to consider letting go of this potentially dangerous characteristic.
Seven Simple and Imperfect Ways to Crumple Up and Make Messy Your Perfectionism
1. Fake It Till You Make It. It helps to have a willingness, a strong desire to change and a bit of patience as you move through the process. If you are not there yet, that’s okay! You can pretend. Fake it! You will make it!
2. Embrace Fear. Everyone (with the exception of myself) says that you have to be FEARLESS. Guess what? Life is scary, fear happens. The trick is to knock it out of your way. When fear rears its ‘interesting’ head (not ugly - don’t want to insult it and make it any bigger), say “Helllooooo fear! Nice to see you. Here’s your hat; what’s your hurry.” In other words, acknowledge it and let it know that you appreciate him/her (in all likelihood ‘fear’ has good intentions), and then (seriously) open a window and door and send him/her out! Do it! Open that door, invite it OUT– empowering feelings will surface, I promise!
3. Practice Imperfection. What things can you do that ‘imperfection’ adds to; that imperfection makes better? How about going to one of those paint your own mug/bowl places. You pick out the ceramic piece, sit at a kid’s table, paint a picture or words, colors, whatever and then they ‘bake’ it for you. Thing is, the paint drips, colors blend. The baking process completely changes the look. You can display it proudly in your home. A symbol of your perfect imperfectness.
4. Try On Excellence. “Striving for excellence motivates you; striving for perfection is demoralizing”. ~ Harriet Beryl. We are here to strive for excellence, to grow, to change, to develop, to go forward, to evolve, not just improve.
5. Envision. Imagine your goals and dreams in great detail. See yourself happy and living just how and where you want to be, in all its glorious imperfection. Write it out. Make it real. And then commit to doing one imperfect thing today that will align you with your tomorrow.
6. Let It Go. Let it go. Let it go. Let it go. Softly and sweetly, just let the idea of perfection float out into the clouds. (Video coming soon with instructions on how to let it go. Woo hoo.) Perfectionism takes up a lot psychic space. Clear your mind, unchain yourself from perfectionism, and realize that you have just created an amazing opening for freedom and creativity.
7. Nourish imperfectionism. Let us nourish the beginning of this new time in our lives. We have showed sweet perfectionism the door and know that seeds of imperfectionism have been planted. Bless these seeds, allow them to sprout and grow, in their own imperfect way.
Please leave a comment and share your seeds of imperfection. How will you add a tablespoon of delicious and satisfying imperfection to your life today?
For more perfectly fabulous imperfection, check out All Is Forgiven, Move On!
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I very much agreed because I have seen people, especially wives have taken all the fun,and pleasure out of there homes because they are a perfectitonists.Children cannot sit in the sofa, husband cannot lay in the bed,etc.And this very often leads to seperation,and devorce. another thing it causes one to live in a world of vain Glory, Yes false pretends.A jentlemen once said he woke up one night at 2:00am in the morning,got out his bed to use the bethroom, and when he got back to bed his wife had already made up the bed.CAN YOU EMAGINE?
Thank you very much for the space.
One year, I gave up my perfectionism for Lent; the new found freedom was incredible. When Lent was over, I felt so free, I decided to not take it back up. I've become more spontaneous, easy-going (mostly), and enjoying Life a whole lot more. Do it!
Not only must we let these things go, in the bible GOD (and Christ) says that we are created equal in GOD's eyes, and to him we are perfect. Each day that passes by and I have one of my compulsive disorder (I have this disorder where everything has to be perfectly rearranged, cleaned, organized, and falling into place because if not I freak out) rears it's ugly head I have to stop and pray and leave whatever it is that I was starting to freak out about because it wasn't perfect, then I feel just fine.
Many years ago I was a high strung perfectionist... everything in my home symetrical, every dish turned with the design the same direction... some will relate to this. My dear friend and I were talking about my wanting to increase my sales. She felt I needed to increase my creative side... and proceeded to make everything in my home asymetrical. It was so difficult for me and felt horrible at first. After a few weeks it began to bother me less. Over the years I have learned that to be human is to be imperfect. Life is so much better without all that extra self imposed stress... and my sales went up and have never gone down.
I can identify with so many of these people. I too pray for release from this destructive affliction. I too suffer with chronic pain, I have goals to complete in a day, but I procrastinate. Unless you have experienced this behavior it's hard to explain to others. My husband trys to understand, but he thinks I can just give it to God and be free.I would like nothing more!
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