How to Pump and Use Your Assertiveness Muscle: Lessons from the Road to Sveltesville – In preparation for my trip this blogger made certain that her ASSERTIVENESS muscle is pumped and ready for action.
Yes, I said, assertiveness muscle – not to be confused with aggression of any kind. While it is my plan to put my needs right out there and have my requests met with a smile; it is not my plan to yell, swear or stomp my feet.
Keeping that in mind, remember that assertive is derived from the word – assert -which meaning is “to state an opinion, claim a right, or establish authority.” Yes, that’s right … claim a right … claim what’s yours!
Aggressiveness, on the other hand, is “characterized by aggression: inclined to behave in an actively hostile fashion.”
As you can see, there is quite a difference between claiming what’s yours and being actively hostile. There’s no need for hostility (even though I suspect it burns more calories).
Our Lady of Weight Loss’s Tips on How to Claim What’s Yours While Travelin’ the Road to Sveltesville (without getting the police involved)

1. Be firm in your conviction.
2. State your needs, while considering the other person’s perspective.
3. Be polite.
4. Be friendly – and smile (on phone and in person – smiling travels the phone wires).
5. Make eye contact, if in person.
6. Behave in a way that expresses confidence.
7. Respect others and they will respect you, in turn.
8. Be patient. If the person with whom you are communicating with does not ‘get’ your request, re-word it. Again, need be.
9. Hold your ground.
10. Remember … you are not bothering anyone. It is your right!
11. Worst case scenario … All Is Forgiven, Move On.
With that in mind, I did telephone the hotel to which I was headed and politely, with a smile on my face (knowing that they could ‘feel’ it) asked them to:
1. Remove the ubiquitous and tempting devil’s treat (jars of nuts, chocolate bars, sodas, etc.) that they so beautifully display from my hotel room.
2. Asked if there was a refrigerator in my room (there was; if not I would have requested one).
3. Inquired if there was a fruit market (small supermarket, food store) near by. There was in easy walking distance. If there had not been, I would have asked that a fruit platter be waiting for me when I arrived (anticipating wanting something after a long flight).
4. Checked to see if the hotel had a fitness room and pool, so I could pack accordingly.
And lo n’ behold … it was all ‘right’ upon arrival. Had it not been, I would have politely reiterated my requests until they happened they way I want them to, because I am worth it and believe in ‘Claiming What Is Mine.’
Claim all that is yours today! Happily and with a smile on your face.
Spread the word (NOT the icing!),
Janice
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