September 2008 Archives

Sharing Stress with Your Main Squeeze by Janice Taylor, Life & Wellness Coach, Cert. Hypnotist, NLP Practitioner, Author, Seminar Leader and 50-Pound Big-Time-Loser! (write Janice for a Free Consult!)

You are stressed to your last nerve. Things are piling up at the job. Things at home are out of control. And the weather is dark, grey and rainy.

You REALLY need to talk, let it out (lest you devour a jumbo one pound candy bar and at 170 calories per ounce that's 2720 calories; two days' calorie allotment) and in walks your main squeeze.

How much stress is appropriate to share with your spouse, partner, significant other ... your main squeeze? What's the difference between sharing and dumping?

True, you need to vent and an important part of a relationship revolves around sharing your life, letting the other person know what's going on, as well as asking for support; giving support. Leaning on each other ... all important parts of a relationship.

Nevertheless, before you dump - 'talk at' the other person, here follows a few truly helpful and useful guidelines:

1. Ask Permission: "Is this a good time to listen? I need to share the gruesome details of my crazy day." If the answer is "NO!" Respect that No! Ask, "Please let me know when it is a good time.
2. Timing: Before you launch into your bucket list of upset, frazzled nerves and complaints (all justified, of course), do check in with your main squeeze to see if he or she is equally stressed.
3. Be Clear: Are you sharing, looking for feedback, or just need a place to be heard. If all you want is to be heard. Start the conversation off with "Please, do not respond. Just listen -intently! I need you to be with me. That's all."
4. Time Yourself: Vent, talk, share ... dump ... whatever you want to call it for a maximum of one minute and then check in and see if the person is still with you. Really 30 seconds would be better. Don't take advantage of the 'sharee.'
5. Responsibility: Ultimately, it is your stress. Support is GREAT! But no one can singularly 'fix it.

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Special Note: For further insight into the machinations of relationships, I checked in with Peter Weinstein, LCSW, Psychotherapist, Relationship Expert.

Mr. Weinstein adds, "Being sensitive to your partner's needs is one of the most important components of a successful relationship. Just as YOU want respect and appreciation, so does your partner/spouse. Putting yourself in the 'others' shoes and considering his/her needs (without sacrificing your own need) is true empathy and the cornerstone of relational/marital bliss.

"Janice gives great advice on how to orchestrate getting help and attention from your 'main squeeze' in a particularly stressful situation. Nicely done."

Spread the word, NOT the icing!
Janice

Write Janice for free 'life' consult!
Follow Janice on Twitter! Food facts. tips and motivation throughout the day!
Workshops! Come, play with me!
Free Our Lady of Weight Loss E-Cards! Spread the FUN word!

For more motivation and inspiration, join the Kick in the Tush Club: Beliefnet Chapter.

Pick up a copy of Janice's latest: All Is Forgiven, Move ON ~ Our Lady of Weight Loss's 101 Fat-Burning Steps on Your Journey to Sveltesville!

" . . . . kooky genius ~ see if her idiosyncratic diet plan will work for you." ~ O, The Oprah Magazine

about Janice

Discover Me JigSaw Sundae by Janice Taylor, Life & Wellness Coach, Cert. Hypnotist, NLP Practitioner, Author, Columnist, Seminar Leader & 50-pound Big-Time-Loser!

"Discover Me" is inspired by a touching tale of woe. When I was 8 years old, and weighed 112 pounds - I secretly wrote letters to Hollywood producers, asking to be discovered.

Dear Hollywood Producer,

I am a chubby girl. I wear pointy glasses. I could be a great character actress. Please discover me.

Hurry!
Janice

After writing, I thoughtfully put my missive in an envelope and wrote "Paramount Studio, Hollywood." I neglected to include street, etc. as I didn't have it handy (no Internet to look it up!), nor did I bother with stamps (didn't have any and figured they'd pay on the other side).

Sadly, no one came and discovered me!

Life Lesson: If you want to be discovered, fully address your envelope and use USPS stamps!

Happy Sundae of a Non-Fattening Kind!

Spread the word, NOT the icing,
Janice

Write Janice for free 'life' consult!
Follow Janice on Twitter! Food facts. tips and motivation throughout the day!
Workshops! Come, play with me!
Free Our Lady of Weight Loss E-Cards! Spread the FUN word!

For more motivation and inspiration, join the Kick in the Tush Club: Beliefnet Chapter.

Pick up a copy of Janice's latest: All Is Forgiven, Move ON ~ Our Lady of Weight Loss's 101 Fat-Burning Steps on Your Journey to Sveltesville!

" . . . . kooky genius ~ see if her idiosyncratic diet plan will work for you." ~ O, The Oprah Magazine

about Janice

How important is it to plan? VERY! By Janice Taylor, Life & Wellness Coach, Certified Hypnotist, Neurolinguistic Practitioner, Author, Seminar Leader & 50-Pound Big-Time-Loser! (write Janice for free consult)

Many of you exhibit quite a bit of resistance around planning your meals, making time for food shopping, and exercising. Is it really that complicated to buy fruit and vegetables? Throw a sandwich together in the morning? Or walk around the block?

Doing nothing is something! By not planning, by not actively creating health, you are planning and manifesting in the negative.

1. Schedule planning time on your calendar and adhere to it!
2. Anticipate problems and plan for them! Life happens. Hold 1/2 hour blocks here and there throughout your day. Consider it catch-up time.
3. Schedule thinking time! Yes, that's right... you have to think!
4. Plan for tomorrow, tonight. You will be amazed how well you will sleep.
5. Plan day-to-day and week-to-week. Once a week schedule time to look at the week to come.
6. Plan on paper. You'll never remember all you need to remember. Trust me!
7. Take your time. No point in rushing and missing something important!

Spread the word, NOT the icing,
Janice

Write Janice for free 'life' consult!
Follow Janice on Twitter! Food facts. tips and motivation throughout the day!
Workshops! Come, play with me!
Free Our Lady of Weight Loss E-Cards! Spread the FUN word!

For more motivation and inspiration, join the Kick in the Tush Club: Beliefnet Chapter.

Pick up a copy of Janice's latest: All Is Forgiven, Move ON ~ Our Lady of Weight Loss's 101 Fat-Burning Steps on Your Journey to Sveltesville!

" . . . . kooky genius ~ see if her idiosyncratic diet plan will work for you." ~ O, The Oprah Magazine

about Janice

Who's Foolin' Who? by Janice Taylor, Life & Wellness Coach, Certified Hypnotist, Author, Columnist, Seminar Leader & 50-pound Big-Time-Loser!! (write Janice for a Free Consult!)

Self Talk: Sometimes, when biting, tasting and licking other people's foods, I have to stop myself and say to myself, "You might not be counting what you're eating, but your body has a built-in calorie counter. Who are you foolin'?"

1. Crumbs don't count.
2. Eating while standing up, doesn't count.
3. It's only one bite.
4. I won't eat the whole thing.
5. Just this one time.
6. I deserve it.
7. It's a celebration.
8. I don't want to hurt my mother's (my sister, my friend, my boss's) feelings.
9. Samples at the supermarket are unexpected. Surprise!!
10. Licking doesn't count.
11. It's free.
12. They're eating it.
13. Life's short.

These 'thoughts' might not hold much power on the page in this moment, but when you are of the mind to eat something, they may seem perfectly rational.

There is an infinite assortment of circumstances in which we encourage ourselves to tell little white lies in the Land of Weight Loss (note I did not say Permanent Fat Removal; because there is no need to lie to oneself in the Land of PFR).

In the face of food, fooling oneself, lying to oneself may seem easier, but in the end you are planting seeds of unhappiness, guilt, and well - fat cells! Fat cells in your mind as well as your body.

What to do? Try this exercise in awareness. Tell the truth! Carry a little notebook with you and write out all your little white lies without judgment.

Then 'leave' one of your white lines in the comment section below or in the Kick in the Tush Club community! It will be deposited in Our Lady of Weight Loss's White Lie Bank. For every 3,500 white food lies deposited, you will permanently remove a pound!

Spread the word, NOT the icing!
Janice

Write Janice for free 'life' consult!
Follow Janice on Twitter! Food facts. tips and motivation throughout the day!
Workshops! Come, play with me!
Free Our Lady of Weight Loss E-Cards! Spread the FUN word!

For more motivation and inspiration, join the Kick in the Tush Club: Beliefnet Chapter.

Pick up a copy of Janice's latest: All Is Forgiven, Move ON ~ Our Lady of Weight Loss's 101 Fat-Burning Steps on Your Journey to Sveltesville!

" . . . . kooky genius ~ see if her idiosyncratic diet plan will work for you." ~ O, The Oprah Magazine

about Janice

On Your Mark, Get Ready, GO HEALTHY! - Simple and Easy Tips by Janice Taylor, Life & Wellness Coach, Certified Hypnotist, Syndicated Columnist, Seminar Leader, 50-pound big-time-loser. (Write Janice for free consult!) People ask me about my eating habits. They're...

Wind-Water and Weight by Janice Taylor, Life & Wellness Coach, Cert. Hypnotist, Author. Columnist, Seminar Leader and 50-pound big-time-loser. (Write Janice for Free Consult.) FENG SHUI (pronounced "fung shway"), the Chinese art of placement, literally translates as "wind-water." Wind represents...

In Celebration of National "Dear Diary Day" - Let's Write! by Janice Taylor, Life & Wellness Coach, Cert. Hypnotist, Columnist, Seminar Leader & 50-pound Big-Time-Loser In the fast paced world of computers, e-mails, and text messages, I am putting forth...

New Words, Thoughts and Foods for the Anti-Aging Crowd by Janice Taylor, Life & Wellness Coach, Cert. Hypnotist, NLP Practitioner, First, I MUST address the word "anti-aging," which annoys me and is totally on my last nerve. It is plastered...

I heart pasta! I do!! By Janice Taylor, Life & Wellness Coach, Cert. Hypnotist, Author, Syndicated Columnist, Seminar Leader & 50-pound Big-Time-Loser! Fun Factoid: Thomas Jefferson is credited with introducing macaroni to the United States, he fell in love with...

Depression and Your Weight by Janice Taylor, Life & Wellness Coach, Author, Syndicated Columnist, Seminar Leader and 50-pound Big-Time-Loser. I know from first hand experience that depression can move someone toward food. (Yes, this 'happy idiot' has had bouts of...

She's Got Quite a Pear! by Janice Taylor, Life & Wellness Coach, Cert. Hypnotist, Author, Syndicated Columnist, Seminar Leader and 50-pound Big-Time-Loser!! But square-cut or pear-shape, these rocks don't lose their shape! ~ Leo Robin (1900-1984), U.S. songwriter. "Diamonds...

This digitally enhanced collage (now jigsaw puzzle) entitled Blow the Fat Cells Out of My Mind was created by Janice Taylor, Life & Wellness Coach, Cert. Hypnotist, Author and 50-pound BIG-Time-LOSER!!!! Janice tells us, "I permanently removed over 50...

A Sunday Prayer by Janice Taylor, Life & Wellness Coach, Certified Hypnotist, author, columnist and 50-pound big-time-loser. While traveling the Road to Sveltesville, one will undoubtedly 'hear voices' in their head that command them to 'eat another slice of...

A Grain of Salt by Janice Taylor, Life & Wellness Coach, Certified Hypnotist, Author, and 50-pound Big-Time-Loser. Salt, also known as sodium chloride, is our number-one source of sodium. It is an important, much needed mineral in our diets. Sodium...

The Miracle of the Whole Grain: I prayed for WHOLE GRAINS to show up and they did! By Janice Taylor, Life & Wellness Coach, Certified Hypnotist, Author, Columnist, 50-pound big-time-loser! I was talking to Our Lady of Weight Loss the...

Scrambled Eggs by Janice Taylor, Life & Wellness Coach, Cert. Hypnotist, Author and 50-pound big-time-loser. You've decided to make scrambled eggs for breakfast. You take three eggs from the refrigerator. As you are oh so gracefully moving toward the counter,...

Juicy and Tender Flow by Janice Taylor, Life & Wellness Coach, Cert. Hypnotist, Author, Columnist and 50-pound big-time-loser. Have you ever gotten so beautifully and intensely absorbed in an 'action' that time ceased to exist? You look up from the...

This jiggy jigsaw puzzle by Janice Taylor, Life & Wellness Coach, Cert. Hypnotist, Author, Columnist and 50-pound big-time-loser was inspired by the TV show, The Dog Whisperer. Hi All, I'm a big slow on the up-take and only watched...

Wise Crackin' and Young at Heart by Janice Taylor, Life & Wellness Coach, Cert. Hypnotist, Author, Columnist and 50-pound big-time-loser. Dr. Andrew Weill, whom I absolutely adore for so many reasons - his voice, his beard, his impressive knowledge -...

"Joy" says it best! by Janice Taylor, Life & Wellness Coach, Cert. Hypnotist, Author, Columnist, 50 pound big-time-loser. Here follows an e-mail from Joy, a Kick in the Tush Club member, and fan of Our Lady of Weight Loss. Please...

Oats: Grown in the U.S.A. by Janice Taylor, Life & Wellness Coach, Cert. Hypnotist, Author, Columnist and 50-pound Big-Time-Loser! History: As long ago as 7,000 B.C. - in ancient China - man was cultivating his oats (not sowing them). The...

I've got the "End of Summer Blues" and I've got 'em bad! by Janice Taylor, Life & Wellness Coach, Cert. Hypnotist, Author, Columnist and 50-pound Big-Time-Loser. As the light days of summer shorten, and the temperature moves from hot...