Amen sister. And amen to brother Luther too! And I adore that photo. Sometimes when I’m taking pictures of my kids looking clean and smiley, I think it’s a ridiculous way to chronicle our life together since it’s not at all representative of the day to day.

Thank you for this post. I just gave birth to my second child last Friday. And, as I am working to re-adjust to the sleepless nights, constant breat-feeding, and decreased time with my older child and husband, your post was exactly what I needed – a reminder of what parenthood is really all about.
And congrats on the news of your newest family member!

So encouraging to have this reminder from Luther. Thanks for your transparency.

Ellen–Congratulations! We had a tough time with those early days (and months, honestly) of adding William to our family, but God certainly used it to refine our souls! And now we take great joy in him (honestly, not that much joy when he was a newborn. As you said, just lots of adjustments and sleepless nights!). But you will get through it and you will all be expanded in the process. Blessings!

I wonder if this research is rooted in a disordered understanding of happiness, where happiness is confused with the ability to act fully in the interest of the self. Before Tennyson was born I certainly had a lot more time, money and energy to and for myself. I do think God is concerned about our happiness, but probably more in an Aristotilean sense. Not having children (or family, friendships, responsibilities that demand the decreasing of the self) is a pleasure so inferior to other goods that it can’t even be rightly called happiness.
I read an interesting article on Babble about this study that talked about how the extremes of pain and pleasure are so heightened that it’s almost impossible to compare the child-free/less and childful experiences. That definitely resonated with me. The joy is so much more joyful but the pain so much deeper. But even in the pain is in the service of this amazing task of making a person. That’s a pretty great Good.

As a grandmother, mother of 3 and stepmother, parenting and the outcome has been an amazing gift from God. Nowhere else do the little things you do have such a significant impact and result in reciprocated love. It is when you look into the eyes of your child that you see God. As you serve your child, you adopt a fraction of Christ’s humility.

I loved the piece below contained in do kids make you happy!! It is so beautful and so full of truth. Having said that however I would say to those young moms that God also expects us to look after ourselves…mothers give so much of themselves that it is important to invest in themselves too!! By getting our needs met along the way …taking that time every once in a while, we become better people and have more to give to others!!

Fellow Child Lovers,
The greatest pleasure in spending time with a child is knowing that they are so much different then adults.I take the time to look how simple their lives can be and how they are amused with the smallest of things.They always make me smile when they discover a new animal or insect,lol.Ive taken the time to learn from them and also teach them to enjoy the little things in life that as an adult seem to bore us.I have plenty of fishing buddies that hate to bait the hook or take the catch off the line,but its the teaching of self preservation that I get the most credit for,..after all how many kids really know how to fish if it isnt on a video game.I am the proud father of five children,..and If the good lord seen financially fit I would adopt a hundred more.

I am saddened when I hear parents communicate to us how rearing a child is HARD WORK. I raised two boys by myself, who are now in the 30s. Currently am raising a 12 yr. old angel, Isabela Victoria, alone. Nothing gave, or gives me more pleasure than raising them. Changing diapers. Rubbing the little ones belly in the middle of the night becaus of colic. WHo cares. It was a pleasure!!!Never did understand the complaints of others regarding this. I NEVER felt the privelage of raising these little ones was HARD WORK. To me it is the most wonderful thing in life. I cannot describe how much pleasure I feel watching my little ones grow up. I am single dad. The struggle is not the child, it is dealing with the adults in my pursuit to earn the $ to provide for them. THis is HARD WORK!!!!THANK-YOU GOD for this honor!!!!!!And who cares that us single dads never receive, from society, one iota of thanks. WE always hear of the single moms. Dads we hear only about the dead head ones who don’t pay child support.Paul Lorenzo

well, paul unfortunately we can’t all be as perfect as u…j/k actually, yes i have found myself admitting it is very hard work to be a parent, especially a single parent of a chronically ill child. however, as i have come to find out, the harder the work, the more precious the gift, rather its romantic love, education, religion or being a parent. looking at the big picture, i could not ever imagine my life without my child, although, i attribute my last few years of gray hairs, bags under my eyes and higher blood pressure to her…lol. without a doubt she is the best and most important amazing gift in my life!

hmmm not sure of what to say about this one. Raising kids IS hard work especially when you are doing it alone. No one else can convince me of any different. And although sometimes I get frustrated because I can never do anything for myself( not only am I raising 2 on my own- my firstborn is 19 and I’m still watching out for her too, I’m taking care of my mom as well) I have to say that it is a priviledge to be alble to take care of my family with God’s help. In fact I am awestruck at times that God would even trust me to handle a family.
Truth be told, I don’t mind being a mom. Its the lonliness I feel with not having a husband to go with the mommyness. But that is another conversation, right?
Blessings, all!
Dee

So, it’s hard work raising kids even with a husband?? I’m a single mom so I have to give myself a *little* pat on the back, but of course surely the thanks go to God, who has helped me every step of the way. Just today I cried tears because of the stress, I just never get a break, so this article is so timely, thank You Lord! And Dee, I feel the same way so don’t feel alone in that.

My husband and I were talking this weekend (when I was away) about our deep and unending respect for single parents–moms or dads. May God give you grace and LOTS of people to come in and help out. Blessings, Amy Julia

I remember the younger days when I could honestly say, ‘Oh how the kids make me so very happy’. I remember vaguely an e-mail conversat

I have two sons, one is 20 and the other 23. They are the best sons a woman can have. But I have raised them well, and put a lot of life into my family and by the way married 25 years. I have a wonderful family, yes it is hard for a girl. I cook, clean, laundry grocery and work. But my guys work and go to school, so its hard for everyone. But as a cuban, cathlic, I was raised that the family, is special. And that is why I am happy. You are happy at what you are raised to do. God comes first in my home. We all go to mass together, we love it. So raise your children, knowing that a family comes first and that it takes hard work. God Bless You All. Sincerely, Ana

yes, our children are the source that radiates the energy that lights the world, for they are :”The children of the light.” if thats not happiness, than it don’t exist!

KIDS BRING JOY, LOTS OF JOY. RAISING THEM CAN BE A STRUGGLE, BUT WITH GOD ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE. AND HE WILL GIVE US ALL THE GRACE AND STRENGTH BECAUSE THAT IS WHAT WE AS WOMEN ARE MOTHERS ,,, WE CARE.

Children are God’s blessing to us for us to be able to show to others the love of God. Be fruitful and multiply was purpose so that we could raise them up in the fear and admonition of the Lord and have them carry on God’s legacy to future generations. My wife and I have just one child, a daughter named Faith. We are blessed by her and we pray daily that she will be a blessing to others.

Thankyou, so much, Amy for this truly both lovely and refreshing blog. I have a niece and nephew of my own, and they both provide a profound sense of joy, delight, and inspiration to both myself, and the rest of my family. They never cease to amaze us, with their warmth, and incredlble access to knowledge,which is incredible, and for that, I feel truly blessed. Thankyou once again, and God bless.

Kids are cute, often mischievously funny, but, more importantly, the future and promise of the world…God Bless ‘em.