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So says McSweeney's:

Generally, I now think I can do more for the planet as just a guy who used to be God instead of the guy who currently is God, you know what I mean by this? Life is too short to compromise time and resources...it may be tempting and more comfortable to keep your God-head down, plod along, and appease those who demand, "Sit down and shut up," but that's the worthless, easy path − that's a quitter's way out. You can't sit down and shut up when you're God, which is why when I'm not God anymore, I can stand up and do other stuff, like not doing stuff, which is also important, yes?

You betcha.

HT: Rick Bennett

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Before you post an angry comment, repeat this 10 times: Yes, I do have a sense of humor.

Whilst I was at Furman University this week (which, I must say, is one of the most beautiful campuses I've ever seen), I received an email from Princeton Seminary granting me an extension till March, 2010, to finish my dissertation. Upon hearing this, my host at Furman, Vaughn CroweTipton, told me the following fable.

The Rabbit, the Fox, and the Lion

One day, a rabbit was casually hopping back to his hole when, just as he was about to jump into his hole, he was grabbed around the neck by a fox, bent on eating him.

"Oh, please don't eat me," said the rabbit to the fox, "For I am just about to finish my dissertation."

"Why should I care about your dissertation?" asked the fox.

"Because," replied the rabbit, "I think the subject would fascinate you. It's entitled, 'Why Foxes Can't Eat Rabbits.'"

The Washlet.  Does it creep you out?  And seriously, how many euphemisms can you use to avoid saying, "This thing shoots hot water up your ass, then dries you."?

I'm with Larry:

Actually, the mere existence of soccer is proof of total depravity.

These Christians don't....um...you know......

To my post, Penn Gillette Loves Him Some Gideons, PerpetualDreamer replies,Even though I'm no longer a Christian, I find the Gideon bibles very useful - they're free and very effective getting missionaries off my property when I threaten to burn...

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