Your Daily Spiritual Stimulus

Moving From Blame to Forgiveness

Tuesday November 10, 2009

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When bad things happen and we experience a financial loss or hardship,  it's not unusual to want to place the blame on something or someone in order to cope with our feelings.  Anger and blame can be a way of feeling in control, but in actuality, it really only leaves us feeling powerless.

Some people lately are also blaming themselves for their financial challenges, thinking "if only I had done this" or, "I can't believe I did that" or, "what was I thinking?!!" This kind of blame only fuels our fear, anger and resentment and deepens the negative charge we have around the problem.

So, how do we release the harmful feelings and negativity around our financial circumstances?  

Forgiveness is a great tool for releasing negative thought and feelings which can be toxic and counter-productive. We are all looking for peace; peace of mind, body and spirit, right? In order to find it, it is very important to examine what our own responsibility is in the situation and to own our role in it. Once we have forgiven ourselves, it is easier to move forward to forgive others who have hurt or harmed us. 

Beliefnet contributor Joan Borysenko says that forgiveness helps us to create more empowerment, spaciousness and willingness to look at a larger point of view. Another reason to forgive is that it's good for you! According to author and forgiveness expert Fred Luskin, there is now scientific evidence that that  forgiveness can reduce anger, depression and stress, which ultimately will improve your physical and emotional health. 

 
Here are some key points to keep in mind when working through your forgiveness process.

1. Forgiveness is first and foremost for you. It is about taking back your power so that you can see and receive the good around you.

2. Forgiveness allows you to shift your perspective on what is happening. Recognize that your primary distress is coming from the hurt feelings and thoughts that are plaguing you, not what offended or hurt you ten minutes -- or ten years -- ago. Whether you are experiencing the loss of a job, your home or retirement savings, this loss is the real issue, not who did it to you. Grieving a loss is an important process in and of itself, but forgiveness is the first step. Anger often denies us access to the pain of loss. Forgiveness will help you clear the anger and resentment so that you can begin to feel the loss.


3. Forgiveness does not mean that you have to make amends with the person. They don't even have to know because it's not about them. Forgiveness offers you the opportunity to be at peace with the situation. This can be as simple as forgiving the investment company who managed your 401K, or Wall Street, or your mortgage broker. Make a list and forgive them so that you can be free of this energetically and emotionally.

4. Remember forgiveness is a process. It's not always easy and it takes time to heal. Be gentle with yourself and allow yourself to go through your own process. I recommend writing a forgiveness letter to get your feelings on paper. Through writing, you can express your feelings openly either directly to the person or even to yourself. You do not have to give the letter to the person you are forgiving, it is your own process for letting go and creating your "forgiveness story."

Ultimately, forgiveness is a step towards greater spiritual and emotional expansion. It allows you to create the space for letting go of negativie thoughts and feelings so that you can be free of the past and move forward to create the next chapter of your life.

Here's a wonderful prayer to assist you with this forgiveness process:

Dear God,

Please help me to release all judgements, resentments, mistakes and pain of the past. I no longer wish to be bound by these limitations. Help me to release the past and all its hurt so that I may once again live in peace and experience new possibilities and joy. I forgive myself and all others that may have caused me any harm. I surrender these things completely so that I may create a successful, abundant and prosperous life.

I surrender the past in order to make room to fully receive this moment and the future you desire for me. I offer my life as a clean slate into your hands. I choose to be free. Thank you for this day and this opportunity to begin again the blessing of this one great life which I willingly and gratefully receive. And so it is. Amen. 

~ Deborah Price 

Peace & Blessings!

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Comments
Linda Woellert
November 13, 2009 10:46 AM


God is so awesome. I just subscribed to this website and needed to read this prayer and article. I too have been struggling with those blaming statements and of course I made it even more difficult with anger and self pity mixed in.

This was such a blessing! And so simple! I'm forgiven and I forgive.

Joseph Neally
November 13, 2009 3:49 PM

Heavenly Father, we are ever so Thankful for all the Love and all the Blessings you bestowe on us each and every day.

We are especially Thankful for our Wives and Husbands, our Children and Families, our Friends and Neighbors.

But, most of all we are most Thankful for our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ,through whom and in whom our Sins are Forgiven and your Promise of Eternal Life is fulfilled.

And in whose name through the Power of the Holy Spirit we Pray our Prayer of Thanksgiving each day, in Jesus name we pray.....

Amen and Amen

Victoria Davis
November 13, 2009 4:16 PM

I so needed to read this today and say this prayer I am financially struggling and blaming everyone who put me in this situation except myself. I know I need to forgive myself in order to move on and to forgive others whom have hurt me so bad in the past. I say I forgive them and myself but then I go right back to complaining when stress comes my way. I want to forgive all and so I asked that you continue to write these helpful comments so I can learn to forgive myself totally and completely. God Bless you and I will say this prayer over and over until I know I have forgiven from my heart and to think of it no more so I can begin to enjoy this life God had given me. I Thank you Victoria Davis

Felicia
November 13, 2009 5:51 PM

Wow - what a blessing. Lord thank you for guiding me to this email (haven't checked it in months). I've recently lost my father who was dying of cancer and I'm in the process of losing my home (which I've been battling with for a year now). The death of my father has basically torn my family apart. I have so much hurt, hatred and blame that I know it's become toxic and is slowly killing me from the inside out. My financial situation is full of blame not only on myself but on my husband who has struggled with steady work over this past year. I needed to see and say these words. I know this "healing" process of self-forgiveness and the forgiving of others will take time and I plan to print out this simple and poignant prayer so that I can constantly remind myself of what is important and that is God, His Son and The Holy Spirit - in Jesus name I pray. Amen.

Ms Robinson
November 13, 2009 7:10 PM

MY CREATOR I feel the love you are sending through your WORD and the inspiration from branches like this forum put me more at ease.

Wisha, Coulda, Shoulda held tight to the messages long time ago when I came into the realization that you are here. Looking in but not walking with you is just is not enough for me anymore.

Time is now so precious your guidance helps me mentally, financially, pray to forgive and pray to be forgiven...

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About Your Daily Spiritual Stimulus

Financial crisis blogger Deborah Price is devoted to offering hope and support during these difficult times. As a former financial adviser and pioneer in the field of money coaching, she has spent 25 years helping people deal with financial stress from a spiritual, emotional and practical perspective. She is the author of Money Magic: Unleashing Your Potential for Wealth and Prosperity.

Read Deborah's full biography.

You can find out more about Deborah at her website The Money Coaching Institute and Money Therapy.

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