Gospel Soundcheck

You might be a Christian music fan if ...

Wednesday December 3, 2008

Very funny Christian writer Matthew Paul Turner did a post this week on his blog, Jesus Needs New PR, in which he asks readers to finish the phrase, "You might be a Christian rock star if ..."

His suggestions range from ".. if during the middle of massive applause you've ever taken a step back from the microphone and then pointed toward ceiling (Extra credit if you join in the applause!)" to "... if you've ever played at an event that had the word 'Republican' in its name (Extra credit if you sent out a press release!)"

Spot on, Matthew!

Let's twist the joke around and ask: You might be a Christian music fan if ...

OK, I'll start!


You might be a Christian music fan if ...

... your knowledge of Christian music is limited only to the 10 artists played on your local Christian radio station.

... you burned all of your Ray Boltz CDs when you heard he came out of the closet.

... you didn't let your kids listen to the Jonas Brothers, until you found out they were Christians - but you did let your kids listen to David Archuleta, until you found out he was Mormon. [If you didn't get this one, here's an explanation of the joke.]

... you cried when the American Idol contestants sang "Shout To The Lord" on national television.

... you'll go see Third Day play at a mega-church but won't go see them at your local concert arena.

I thought of a few more:

... you're still not over Amy Grant's divorce.

... you'd never go see U2 in concert but you've been to a U2charist.

... you thought Third Day sold out when their tour was sponsored by Chevy.

... you preset all of your radio buttons to Christian stations before you leave your car with your mechanic.

OK, your turn! Fill in the blank. What are some of the Christian music stereotypes you've noticed?

Remember, it's OK to laugh at ourselves once in a while. In fact, I think it's the 11th commandment ... Thou shalt not take thyselves too seriously ... and honest, I'm poking fun at myself here, too (although I've never owned a Ray Boltz CD, but if I did I wouldn't burn it). There's a reason that outsiders look at Christian music and scratch their heads in puzzlement. We do weird, contradictory stuff sometimes.

And head over to Matthew Paul Turner's blog. He's funny and has a great take on the whole Christian community bubble.

RELATED POST
The Jonas Brothers/David Archuleta joke explained

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Comments
Joanne Brokaw
December 4, 2008 6:15 AM

Mark, are you serious? Really? Do you not understand the concept of irony? I'M NOT MOCKING DAVID ARCHULETA. The joke is about hypocritical Christians.

I'm not even going to explain the joke again. Clearly the point either went right over your head or you're just looking for a reason to argue.

Joanne
host of the GS blog

Gayle
December 4, 2008 8:23 AM

I thought everyone knew by now that Mormons ARE Christians. You're just perpetuating an old myth. By the way, David Archuleta is one of the finest people on earth and I hope that his new-found fame never changes him.

Joanne Brokaw
December 4, 2008 8:51 AM

Gayle, I'm beginning to wonder if Mormons understand the concept of irony.

Joanne
host of the GS blog

Joanne Brokaw
December 4, 2008 10:33 AM

In case you need it, and clearly most of you do, here's an explanation of the Jonas Brothers/David Archuleta joke:
http://blog.beliefnet.com/gospelsoundcheck/2008/12/you-might-be-a-christian-m.html

Joanne
host of the GS blog

Tim Smithpeters
December 11, 2008 10:40 AM

I am a fan of good ole Southern Country Gospel Music. I've been playing the guitar for a Southern Country Gospel band for quite
some time now, and it is a true blessing to see souls saved at singings.

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About Gospel Soundcheck

Award-winning freelance writer and columnist Joanne Brokaw covers entertainment for The Christian Examiner newspapers, The Minnesota Christian Chronicle, and The Ozarks Christian News. Her other writing credits include Breakaway and Brio Magazines, OnCourse Magazine, ChristianMusicPlanet.com, BuddyHollywood.com and AGreaterFreedom.com. Her humor column, A Big Slice of Life, appears monthly in the Christian Voice Magazine and she pens a regular humor column on The Writing Life for ByLine Magazine. Joanne lives in Western New York with her darling husband David, their Border collie Scout and their cat Murphy. Their almost adult daughter Cassie drops by often. Find out more about Joanne at JoanneBrokaw.com.

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